Why Louisiana is a terrible place: A pictoral annotation

Upon entering this shitehole from any direction, one will instantly look back in regret as to why they did not spring for the extra hazard package:









With 90% of its population living well below the poverty line, it is not uncommon to see shanty towns littered along the countryside on I-10 and I-49.

See Lafayette(pronounced: laugh ee yet):





They love their "swamp culture," and will take every opportunity to throw it in your face(as if you actually care). By ancient tradition, on their first birthday, every child must catch his/her own alligator, and must care for it. Forever!:














And before you ask... yes, even birds get their own alligator:


Which sometimes ends badly:




Since English is their second language, and the few who do speak it will pretend they don't and try to take advantage of you(assume all are no good tricksters), you should study up on your French before visiting.

Even their signs are all in French:





Their penal code comes directly from the Emperor Napolean II of France; therefore, this gives them to right to detain anyone for several weeks with no charge, and they will publicly decapitate you.

Downtown New Orleans circa 1984:





Their governor is an amiable man, but will turn upon you in a moments notice. If you make fun of his hair, fail to complement his choice of tie and swear fielty, or appear to be amused in any way about the irony of an Indian guy with a thick Southern accent, he will shoot you:





Northern Louisiana is rife with violence and terrorism. Bossier city is a veritable war zone, and Shreveport is home to the American branch of Al Qaeda:




But it isn't wholly without its merits, they don't call it "Sportsman's Paradise" for nothing. With its ancient swamps and teeming with wildlife, Caddo Lake is one one of the most picturesque, beautiful places on earth:





Oops, That's the Texas side, sorry. Here's Louisiana:


Get it together, people!