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4 Archetypal Clemson Fans
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:19 pm
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:19 pm
By popular demand in the other Clemson thread:
The 4 Archetypal Clemson Fans
The Joel Osteen Clemson fan: he literally believes supporting Clemson and Saint Dabo will result in either a materialistic reward or an eternal afterlife. And you better not change the radio station from K-Love when you're in his car.
The Marty Smith Clemson fan: he loves Crossfit, attends the local megachurch and 90% of the words coming from his mouth are inspirational messages from Coach Swinney. Sneaking suspicion he's queer. He thinks Florida-Georgia Line is the greatest band of this generation.
The Todd Chrisley Clemson fan: everyone else knows he's queer, but he's still in the closet, so he clings to the thing he thinks will make him look straight, even though his "man" cave is a shrine to Trevor Lawrence. His favorite band is Rascal Flatts.
The Facebook Karen Clemson fan: her entire life revolves around social media and posting Christian inspirational memes. She supports a law outlawing the criticism of Dabo Swinney and believes anyone who visits Columbia worships Satan. She plays that Martina McBride cancer song on repeat and dares anyone to change it.
Dabo's speech to his followers when the veil is lifted and he's revealed to be the fraud and phony that he is:

The 4 Archetypal Clemson Fans
The Joel Osteen Clemson fan: he literally believes supporting Clemson and Saint Dabo will result in either a materialistic reward or an eternal afterlife. And you better not change the radio station from K-Love when you're in his car.

The Marty Smith Clemson fan: he loves Crossfit, attends the local megachurch and 90% of the words coming from his mouth are inspirational messages from Coach Swinney. Sneaking suspicion he's queer. He thinks Florida-Georgia Line is the greatest band of this generation.

The Todd Chrisley Clemson fan: everyone else knows he's queer, but he's still in the closet, so he clings to the thing he thinks will make him look straight, even though his "man" cave is a shrine to Trevor Lawrence. His favorite band is Rascal Flatts.

The Facebook Karen Clemson fan: her entire life revolves around social media and posting Christian inspirational memes. She supports a law outlawing the criticism of Dabo Swinney and believes anyone who visits Columbia worships Satan. She plays that Martina McBride cancer song on repeat and dares anyone to change it.
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Dabo's speech to his followers when the veil is lifted and he's revealed to be the fraud and phony that he is:

Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:20 pm to SCLibertarian
Dipshit is the only word needed to describe a Clemson fan.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:21 pm to gamecockman12
Were you trying to post this on the SC board?
This post was edited on 12/20/21 at 6:30 pm
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:24 pm to Mr Sausage
There was a thread posted on this board about a female Clemson fan threatening to shoot UGA or Gamecock fans who made fun of her. I posted this in that thread and was asked to make a separate thread about it (by a non-Gamecock fan).
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:32 pm to Wildcat1996
quote:
I chuckled.
As did I.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:36 pm to ScoggDog
This was funny!!
Especially the people used in the pics and the narrative. I literally LOL'd.
Especially the people used in the pics and the narrative. I literally LOL'd.
This post was edited on 12/20/21 at 6:38 pm
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:45 pm to SCLibertarian
Is Facebook Karen lesbian? That's all I really want to know.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:49 pm to Prole Drift
quote:
Is Facebook Karen lesbian?
No, but she named her vibrator Deshaun and swears every one of those 22 women are lying. You don't stand a chance baw.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:52 pm to SCLibertarian
The Clemson fan who needs Klean Strip to wash his face at night... when he even bothers to (in other words, most Clemson fans).


This post was edited on 12/20/21 at 6:53 pm
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:53 pm to SCLibertarian
Complains about Clemson fans posting...
Makes post about Clemson fans...
Makes post about Clemson fans...
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:54 pm to El_Tigre94
quote:
Complains about Clemson fans posting...
I love it when you cultists post. You show everyone else just how insufferable you are.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:57 pm to El_Tigre94
quote:Don't get mad; get Sherwin-Williams.
El_Tigre94

Posted on 12/20/21 at 6:59 pm to cyde
quote:
Don't get mad; get Sherwin-Williams.
Are you the fat or bald guy?
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:00 pm to El_Tigre94
quote:That's my diddy and my uncle. I'm the guy in the back with the cap and shades on.
Are you the fat or bald guy?

This post was edited on 12/20/21 at 7:01 pm
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:00 pm to El_Tigre94
Why do I feel like you’re probably both
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:03 pm to SCLibertarian
I don’t get how people follow Joel Osteen
I can look at him and tell he is a fraudulent sleazebag
I can look at him and tell he is a fraudulent sleazebag
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:08 pm to cyde
quote:
Don't get mad; get Sherwin-Williams.
It’s don’t get mad, get Glad.
The frick you get sherwin williams from?

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