bad experience last year in columbia missouri

i dont no if yall no me but i been here a long time so with mizzou comin to starkville this week i figure i come by and tell why i dont trust nobody from columbia if yall no me i went up there for the game last year and lotta scary stuff happen to me so i swore off that place but they comin here now so imma warn yall

now dont get me wrong its nice town but lotta people theres not nice if ur not in a frat or drivin a subaru plus they got more round abouts then a nascar track and my truck dont turn that good since i hit the deer so i spent first day just goin in circles on providence road

anyways week before the trip i been lookin on facebook marketplace for bass boat cause mine sunk at lake washington after my cousin tater used it as a dock so i seen one listed in columbia 2011 tracker 17 foot with trailer 2800 obo and guy say it run good just needs "a little love" so i figure i knock out two birds with one stone and go see it after the game

his name randy from hallsville he say meet him at the casey's cause he dont like people knowin were he live which is not a red flag cause i dont like that neither

when i get there randy already there sittin on the tailgate of a 98 silverado with no tags eatin a breakfast pizza at 6 at night and the boat hooked up behind it and i seen right away the boat got a mizzou tiger painted on the side look like garfield got hit by a riding mower and the trolling motor held on with zip ties and a bungee

now being from greenville i done bought more junk off marketplace then the salvation army but i ask randy can i see it run so he say follow him to the pond at his uncles

so we drive out 20 minutes past were the gravel start and pull up to a pond with a sign say NO TRESPASSIN THIS MEANS U RANDY and i ask about the sign and he say his uncle got a sense of humor

we back the boat in and she start right up and i take it out a lap and its runnin good but i notice smell like somebody deep fried a tire so i ask randy and he say thats normal for trackers and i believe him cause 4 natty daddys

about the middle of the pond the motor start smokin and a goose come out the reeds and it the biggest goose i ever seen like a goose that been takin creatine and it start honkin and flappin at me so i go to swat it with the paddle but i miss and hit the throttle and run the boat up on the bank right into a deer stand

thats when the lights come on at the house

a old man come out in his draws with a shotgun and a flashlight yellin RANDY I TOLD U and randy already in his silverado haulin arse down the gravel with my 2800 dollars cash i gave him for "gas money down payment" and the trailer

so now its me the goose the old man and a boat in a deer stand

this all the time i got right now i gotta pipe fittin class i gotta teach but imma tell the rest before kickoff saturday

frick u columbia and frick u randy i want my money back hail state