SEC teams as bands

georgia- jouney :Both are extremely relevant and popular in each of their respective categories. Both have strung together a respectable career with above average successes. However, when you really think about it neither has accomplished anything since 1980.

Alabama- the beatles: Both are perennially mentioned as one of the greatest of all time. Both are deeply rooted in history and have, for the most part, maintained their relevance and popularity throughout the years. There are iconic images with both like Abbey Road and the houndstooth hat.

However, there are also some blemishes that fan bases from each wish could be forgotten. For every mention of 15 national titles and “Let it Be” there is also the embarrassment of the Shula and Dubose years as well as “Love Me Do.”

Auburn-Ashlee Simpson: I was going to go with Milli Vanilli here, but it just seemed too spiteful. I chose Ashlee Simpson, and it fits perfectly for a number of reasons. First, neither can be mentioned without the mention of their “big brother/ sister” in the same sentence.

Both have only had a short period of time in the limelight of relevance in the past decade and said relevance Also, both have had their fair share of cheating allegations, and by allegations I mean blatantly obvious incidents of deception. Auburn with Cam Newton, and Ashlee Simpson with her wildly uncomfortable lip syncing mishap on Saturday Night Live and the Orange Bowl.

Arkansas-Def Leppard: This may be the best comparison on the board. For a short period of time each seemed like they were on the doorstep of stardom and success. Then a terrible vehicular accident maimed one of their members in each respective group.

Arkansas had the motorcycle crash of Bobby Petrino and a car crash infamously left drummer Rick Allen without an arm.

Now, instead of being thought of as a member of any top five discussion they are cheered for with the same enthusiasm and sympathy as someone in the Special Olympics.

LSU-Black Sabbath: Both have a fairly illustrious career that is riddled with highlights and achievements. Both also are synonymous with terrifying images and memories that are the cornerstone for their respective legacies. LSU has the intimidating and imposing football cathedral that is known as Death Valley, and at night there is no other stadium in the country that is as feared.

Sabbath has the notoriety of front man Ozzy Osbourne biting the head of a bat as well as peeing on the Alamo. I guess those aren’t as revered.

But each time Les Miles or Ozzy speak you are left with a confused look on your face thinking, “What the frick is he talking about.”

Texas A&M-Justin Beiber: Oh man, it was cute and endearing when we first were introduced to these two. Who’s this charismatic teen that looks like a lesbian, but is driving preteens wild with his dancing and singing? And, who is this wildly talented white kid who is a master of improvisation on the football field and evading responsibility off of it?

Fans and media across the country couldn’t get enough of either, but now that new star smell has worn off most are sick of the overexposure we’ve been inundated with from each. They’ve both shed their innocent images and embraced a bad boy persona of rebellion and indifference to authority.

Manziel has damn near turned Sportscenter into an episode of TMZ. Also, Bieber recently peed in a janitor’s bucket after a concert and Johnny Drama will probably do that next.

Mizzou-98 Degrees: Both exploded on the scene out of nowhere finding their niche in comfortable surroundings. For Mizzou it was in the high-octane offense laden Big 12 conference, and for 98 Degrees it was in the abomination of the late ‘90s known as the boy band craze.

Kentucky-Nickleback: I dont need to explain much here.

Vanderbuilt-Miley Cyrus: Both were long-considered a cute, non-threatening member to the college football and music society. They were fun to cheer for and not take seriously. Then over the last few years both have taken a complete 180 turn.

Ignited by James Franklin and raging hormones, respectively of course, each has morphed into an uncomfortable transformation that demands to be taken seriously.

Also, it would be impossible not to make this comparison without mentioning the unsettling and uncomfortable recent events with the rape allegations at Vandy and Miley dancing too close to that baseball stadium souvenir at the VMAs.

Mississippi State-MGMT: A few years ago each were emerging stars. MGMT burst on the scene with their album Oracular Spectacular and was dubbed as the top artist to watch in 2008 by Rolling Stone magazine.

Around the same time, Mississippi State hired Dan Mullen who was highly sought out after his success with Tim Tebow as the offensive coordinator at Florida.

Now it’s 2013, and many are left wondering what the hell happened to each? Also, much like the whereabouts of MGMT there’s no way I could point out where the frick Starkville is on a map.

South Carolina-Kenny Chesney: Much like the many patrons that attend a Chesney in droves, Steve Spurrier also dislikes having to wear a shirt when he doesn’t have to. While Carolina hasn’t had the illustrious career that Chesney has there is still something to be said for the commitment and dedication of each of their fan bases.

I’ve also always considered Chesney to be a poor man’s Jimmy Buffet (despite me abhorring Buffet), and in the same way it will be difficult for Kenny to match his longevity of relevance, South Carolina will most likely never reach the heights that Spurrier reached while overseeing the Fun N’ Gun at Florida in the ‘90s.

Ole Miss-Phillip Phillips: There is a lot of excitement and buzz around both. Ole Miss had a top victory against LSU, and Phillip Phillips has already had a top 25 hit after winning american Idol.

Florida-Justin Timberlake: Both were equally dislikable in the ‘90s unless you were a member of their fan base because if there’s anything people hate more than Poppy boy bands is success, and no other team in the SEC had as much success as Florida in the ‘90s.

The two also spent a few years out of the limelight in the early 2000s as JT embarked on his solo career and Florida tried to make Ron Zook a thing.

However, both are back at the forefront of relevance now, and are back at the top of their games

Tennessee-I got tired. I couldnt think of anyone