Ranking the SEC's Nicknames (Revisited?)

A good nickname for a college team is important for exposure, marketing, and overall school image both athletically and academically. So, here is how I graded the SEC teams, based on the following criteria:
1. Distinguishing uniqueness in both (a)originality and (b)locality
a. Unmistakable. No other or few other college teams with the same or similar nicknames. (Example: Without question, when we say "Fighting Irish" we all know we are talking about Notre Dame. ...And frick Notre Dame.)
b. highlights the qualities and features of state in which the school is located
2. Traditional/Historic reference to the school, state, or region.

14-12 (tie). Tigers—

Everybody (including Auburn, LSU, and Missouri) is nicknamed "Tigers" from peewee to high school to lingerie league. At least for LSU, the term has historical reference to the Louisiana Militia. Auburn should give up the moniker all together and go with "War Eagles." It's not really unique or historical, but better than "Tigers." Missouri should change to the Show Mes or something. "Tigers" has no reference to any qualities or history of the State of Missouri. I vote "The Ruffians" or "The Josey Waleseses".

11-10 (tie). Bulldogs –

Another high school favorite that has no uniqueness or reference to the state. When I think of Georgia or Mississippi, I don't think of a slobbering English mutt.

9. Aggies –

Taking off the homer hat here. There was a time when every state ag college was nicknamed the Aggies, so it's not original and does not distinguish A&M or highlight unique features or history of the State of Texas. (It's the national TV nut grabbing that distinguishes A&M. I know, I know. Save the jokes). It's not original, but like the university itself, the moniker is an ode to tradition and there aren’t that many "Aggies" left out there.

8. Rebel Black Bears –

There was NOTHING wrong with Rebels!!! I would have put "Rebels" near the top. It's totally original, distinguishing, and traditional/historic. Black Bears, while it does highlight the State of Mississippi, is still the "Bears" like other teams. Go back to Rebels.

7. Wildcats –

High school. Not unique. I don't associate wildcats with the State of Kentucky outside the university itself.

6. Crimson Tide –

It's certainly unique and distinguishing. WTF is a "crimson tide" anyway? Red algae? The problem is it has NOTHING to do with the State of Alabama or the region. Did the Gulf of Mexico have some serious outbreak of algae poising when the Tide picked that name? I don't get it.

Pre-University of Alabama word association game: Say the first word that comes to mind as fast as you can.
Ready?
ALABAMA...RED ALGAE!!!

No, it doesn’t work.


5. Gamecocks –

I picked Gamecocks ahead of Crimson Tide SOLELY because I have seen pictures of cheerleaders holding up a sign that says "COCKS" on it. Serious bonus points there. But, like "Crimson Tide" it does nothing to highlight the state (unless I am seriously lacking in SC State history).

4. Gators --

It's a unique name that highlights the features of the State of Florida. The only reason I ranked "Gators" at 4 is because when I think of Louisiana, I think about how screwed up and backwards the world can be at times, and how much I hate that fricked up Napoleonic Code bullshite, but I also think of gators. So, it's not TOTALLY unique to the State of Florida, but it's pretty close. I like it.

3. Razorbacks --

"Razorbacks" is, without question, one the most distinguishing and unmistakable nicknames in the SEC. Everybody knows that a razorback is a wild Ozarkan feral pig. Like the "Gators," however, the animal is not completely unique to Arkansas. In fact, according to Wikipedia, the State of Texas has more razorbacks than any other state, but when most people hear "razorback", they immediately think of...

...Ned Beatty and banjos picking!!! (I keeed, I keeed.)

2. Commodores --

"Commodores" is unique and historic in that the name comes from its founding and history. According to Wikipedia, the university is named in honor of shipping and rail magnate "Commodore" Cornelius Vanderbilt, who provided the school its initial $1 million endowment despite having never been to the South. The "Commodore" hoped that his gift and the greater work of the university would help to heal the sectional wounds inflicted by the Civil War in Tennessee. The only reason I put this one at #3 is that, mostly, around the nation, when you say "Commodores", everybody thinks of....

....Lionel Richie.

1. Volunteers –

UT has a very unique, historic, state-specific nickname that is unmistakably used in reference to the university. According to Wikipedia, Tennessee is known as the "Volunteer State," a nickname earned during the War of 1812 because of the prominent role played by volunteer soldiers from Tennessee, especially during the Battle of New Orleans.

(Note to Louisianans: You're welcome, Boudreaux. Love, The Vols.)



...and -- :nb4a&mshouldchangetojizzjars:


ETA: Didn't know that about SC and the Gamecock. That should get you a bump, but I have never heard that before. SC should market that more.