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My worst fear came true today
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:42 pm
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:42 pm
My honest to God worst nightmare in the world is that I would walk out the door and have a snake sitting right there. I don't care if it's a cancer curing rat snake, they all freak me the hell out. I had steaks in hand ready to grill with a starving family inside. No choice. I laid down man meet side stepped the serpent and dashed to the shed.
A shovel was all I had. I went behind him and cried the battle cry of a 4 year old girl peeing her pants. I brought down my shovel like the gods of old and struck the head of the serpent.
Glancing blow. Now the effer knows.
Without thinking of my body or life I start slinging the shovel face down to club him to death till my hands are raw.
In his death throws I strike the final blow, severing head from.... Whatever the rest of the snake is.
Victory is mine
And
Were my prizes for the evening.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:48 pm to Phat Phil
quote:
kill it with fire
A regular garden hoe works pretty well too, even faster.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:51 pm to KajunGator
quote:
It was just a damn snake...
No such thing.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:52 pm to 3nOut
You coulda just picked it up and let it go in the woods.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:54 pm to Alahunter
I live in the middle of downtown in a metropolitan area. There aren't woods near here. Normally I'd have tossed it over the fence but my kids play back here a lot.
I killed a 2 foot copperhead 2 years ago in my back yard.
I killed a 2 foot copperhead 2 years ago in my back yard.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:56 pm to 3nOut
quote:
copperhead
Those get the hell killed out of em.
I had a friend got struck twice in the hand by one, pulling lumber out of the back of his truck after sitting overnight. His arm swelled as large as his leg and thought he was gonna lose a couple fingers. Them things pack some mean venom.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:56 pm to 3nOut
quote:
2 foot copperhead
Just a baby
Did you, at least, plant skittles and tea on him?
Posted on 3/21/14 at 6:57 pm to 3nOut
quote:
No such thing
Yeah frick snakes
Posted on 3/21/14 at 7:00 pm to Alahunter
quote:
friend got struck twice in the hand by one, pulling lumber out of the back of his truck after sitting overnight.
Snakes can climb into the back of a truck? Oh frickkkkkk no
Posted on 3/21/14 at 7:02 pm to Phat Phil
quote:
kill it with fire
Done.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 7:06 pm to UMRealist
He was parked under a tree, probably fell out of it. It was able to strike him twice though, by the time he could pull away. They're fast.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 7:07 pm to 3nOut
reptiles carry salmonella. Now you're going to poison your family with a dead snake.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 7:08 pm to 3nOut
If that's your worst fear you are a very simple man. Mine would be finding out my little nephews, my brother, one of my close friends (or one of their children), or myself finding out they had a terminal illness.
Posted on 3/21/14 at 7:21 pm to Alahunter
quote:
reptiles carry salmonella. Now you're going to poison your family with a dead snake
Note the raging bacteria killing fire.
We've survived raw bacteria infested deer, cow, dove, feral hog, turkey and chicken.
This post was edited on 3/21/14 at 7:27 pm
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