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Posted on 10/22/24 at 3:45 pm to Floki
A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “Hey bartender, I know a great Aggie joke. You want to hear it?” The bartender says, “Well, before you tell it I should probably tell you that I went to A&M. And you see those two big guys sitting next to you – they were linebackers for the A&M football team. And those two guys on your other side – they’re Marines, and they used to be in the Corps of Cadets at A&M. Now, are you sure you really want to tell that Aggie joke?” The guy thinks for a second. “I guess not,” he said. “I wouldn’t want to have to explain it five times.”
Posted on 10/22/24 at 3:56 pm to Dotarian
Couple of aggies were heading to watch a game at Kyle Field. Driving down the highway, they see a sign saying "College Station Left." So, they turned around & went home.
Posted on 10/22/24 at 3:57 pm to Dotarian
Texas A&M. That is the joke
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:01 pm to Lolathon234
quote:
Texas A&M. That is the joke
Welcome to the SEC, where even the jokes kick the Longhorns' arse.
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:05 pm to Lolathon234
quote:
Texas A&M. That is the joke
You sound like fun.
It’s football. Lighten up.
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:12 pm to FootballFrenzy
An Aggie who walks in to an appliance store and says "I would like to buy that TV." The clerk says "Sorry sir, we don't serve Aggies."
The next day the Aggie comes in dressed as his grandma and says, "Hi there sweety. I would like to buy that TV." The clerk says "Sorry ma'am, we don't serve Aggies."
The next day the same Aggie comes in dressed as his grandpa and says "Hey there sonny. I'd like to buy that TV." The clerk says "Sorry sir, we don't serve Aggies."
The Aggie takes off his wig and says, "I've come here the last three days. I dressed as my grandma, I dressed as my grandpa, and all I want to do is buy that TV! How in the world did you know it was me?" Well sir, that there is a microwave.
The next day the Aggie comes in dressed as his grandma and says, "Hi there sweety. I would like to buy that TV." The clerk says "Sorry ma'am, we don't serve Aggies."
The next day the same Aggie comes in dressed as his grandpa and says "Hey there sonny. I'd like to buy that TV." The clerk says "Sorry sir, we don't serve Aggies."
The Aggie takes off his wig and says, "I've come here the last three days. I dressed as my grandma, I dressed as my grandpa, and all I want to do is buy that TV! How in the world did you know it was me?" Well sir, that there is a microwave.
This post was edited on 10/22/24 at 4:13 pm
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:14 pm to Wellborn
A Texas fan walks in to an Aggie bar on game day to meet some friends. He then goes to the bar and orders a beer. The bartender looks at him sideways but serves him the frostymug anyway.
The UT fan gets a smile on his face and says "Hey, Bartender, I bet you a hundred bucks that if you slide a mug down the bar I can piss in it and fill it up before it gets to the end".
Intrigued, the bartender accepts the bet. The UT fan gets up on the bar, whips out his johnson and says "Let 'er fly!".
The bartender chucks the beer mug down the bar as fast as he can, and the UT fan completely misses it - he gets piss everwhere BUT in the mug.
Dejectedly, the UT fan whips out a $100 bill, plops it down on the bar and walks back to his friends.
While the bartender is enjoying his winnings and cleaning up the piss, he notices that the UT fan is laughing and giggling about something with his group of friends. He walks over and says 'you just lost $100 bucks on a stupid bet - what are you laughing about?"
The UT fan says "I bet my friends $1000 bucks that I could piss all over your stupid bar and you'd be happy about it!"
The UT fan gets a smile on his face and says "Hey, Bartender, I bet you a hundred bucks that if you slide a mug down the bar I can piss in it and fill it up before it gets to the end".
Intrigued, the bartender accepts the bet. The UT fan gets up on the bar, whips out his johnson and says "Let 'er fly!".
The bartender chucks the beer mug down the bar as fast as he can, and the UT fan completely misses it - he gets piss everwhere BUT in the mug.
Dejectedly, the UT fan whips out a $100 bill, plops it down on the bar and walks back to his friends.
While the bartender is enjoying his winnings and cleaning up the piss, he notices that the UT fan is laughing and giggling about something with his group of friends. He walks over and says 'you just lost $100 bucks on a stupid bet - what are you laughing about?"
The UT fan says "I bet my friends $1000 bucks that I could piss all over your stupid bar and you'd be happy about it!"
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:26 pm to Dotarian
Two Aggys checking the fences finds a nannie goat with her head caught in the fence Aggy#1 pulls down his pants and mounts the goat with the passion of a 1000 men.
Aggy#2 says I wish I could do that.
Aggy#1 says go ahead I wont tell
Aggy#2 but what if I cant get my head out of the fence
Aggy#2 says I wish I could do that.
Aggy#1 says go ahead I wont tell
Aggy#2 but what if I cant get my head out of the fence
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:56 pm to Dotarian
An old farmer was driving his pickup truck outside of College Station and saw a couple of aTm yell leaders walking on the side with a thumb out.
The farmer stops and says "Need a lift somewhere?" One of the yell leaders says, "yes, thanks, our car broke down and we need to get to Kyle Field for the game". "Jump in, I'll take you there." says the old farmer.
Not long after, one of the yell leaders sneaks up a leg and lets out a soft "pffft". They then both giggle and then keep on talking. Perturbed, the farmer doesn't say anything - he just rolls down his window.
A few minutes later the OTHER yell leader sneaks up a cheek and lets out a 'pffffft'. They then start giggleing again.
The farmer, having had enough finally says 'I'll show you children how its REALLY done!". He hikes up a leg and lets loose a cannon-blast fart that rips a hole in his jeans.
Both of the yell leaders start laughing hysterically. The farmer finally asks "What the HELL are you laughing at?".
One of the yell leaders says, softly, "it's just so easy to spot a virgin these days...."
The farmer stops and says "Need a lift somewhere?" One of the yell leaders says, "yes, thanks, our car broke down and we need to get to Kyle Field for the game". "Jump in, I'll take you there." says the old farmer.
Not long after, one of the yell leaders sneaks up a leg and lets out a soft "pffft". They then both giggle and then keep on talking. Perturbed, the farmer doesn't say anything - he just rolls down his window.
A few minutes later the OTHER yell leader sneaks up a cheek and lets out a 'pffffft'. They then start giggleing again.
The farmer, having had enough finally says 'I'll show you children how its REALLY done!". He hikes up a leg and lets loose a cannon-blast fart that rips a hole in his jeans.
Both of the yell leaders start laughing hysterically. The farmer finally asks "What the HELL are you laughing at?".
One of the yell leaders says, softly, "it's just so easy to spot a virgin these days...."
Posted on 10/22/24 at 4:59 pm to Dotarian
It’s really not the same when you take generic old jokes and just put the word Aggie into them
There are specific jokes, thousands of them that were written for this purpose
There are specific jokes, thousands of them that were written for this purpose
This post was edited on 10/22/24 at 4:59 pm
Posted on 10/22/24 at 5:00 pm to Old Sarge
quote:
Old Sarge
Biggest aggy joke of all time
Posted on 10/22/24 at 5:01 pm to swinetime
quote:
passion of a 1000 men.
Aggy#2 says I wish I could do that.
Aggy#1 says go ahead I wont tell
Aggy#2 but what if I cant get my head out of the fence
Posted on 10/22/24 at 5:04 pm to FootballFrenzy
It's funny because it's ghey
Posted on 10/22/24 at 5:05 pm to Old Sarge
There are some jokes that just BEG to be recast as Aggie jokes...
Posted on 10/22/24 at 5:06 pm to Dotarian
Meh, it’s just low energy
Posted on 10/22/24 at 6:24 pm to Wellborn
Most longhorns are liberal. Liberals can’t meme or tell jokes.
Posted on 10/22/24 at 7:44 pm to Corriente Kid
quote:
What did the Aggie do when he locked his keys in the car?......Broke the window and jumped out.
Posted on 10/22/24 at 7:52 pm to Dotarian
Keep them coming! We love Aggie jokes
Posted on 10/22/24 at 7:59 pm to Dotarian
Did you hear about the Aggie who played Russian roulette?
He played with an automatic
He played with an automatic
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