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re: Weddings are out of control
Posted on 1/19/16 at 1:08 pm to Jon Ham
Posted on 1/19/16 at 1:08 pm to Jon Ham
My wife and I got married on her dad's farm. I built a deck on the side of a bank overlooking the creek where we walked out on and said our vows, cut up trees to use as the base to seats, and lagged 2x12s to the logs for seating. We then sewed together old coffee sacks to use as runners and my mom and mother-in-law cooked for everyone. The only thing we hired outside for was the reception tent and the band (unkown lyric). At the end of the day, everything was done for under 2k and we couldn't have been happier with how it turned out. Some might view it as "redneck" due to the venue, but it was classy and well done. Simple is almost always better IMO.
This post was edited on 1/19/16 at 1:09 pm
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Posted on 1/19/16 at 1:54 pm to Jon Ham
quote:Be happy its only a grand. A couple years ago I had to go to a wedding in the freaking Hamptons during football season. Steep price to be apart of that wedding.
My girlfriend is getting ready to drop over $1,000 on her friend's wedding. She has to buy a dress, get professionally done makeup on the wedding day, help throw an engagement party, help throw a bridal shower, and there's a weekend vacation for the bachelorette party. When did getting married entitle the couple to demand such money and time investments from their friends?
But they did have a completely open bar at the rehearsal dinner and reception, and a cigar bar. I like to think I made back several hundred dollars via consumption
Posted on 1/19/16 at 2:07 pm to Jon Ham
Dang. It cost each person in our wedding about $100 to be in it. No way we were going to make people break the bank for us. Here's the problem, your wedding party should only be responsible for paying for their tuxes (or dresses). Not shoes, not ties, etc. I wanted my groomsmen in some inexpensive, casual shoes that I liked, so I bought them myself.. I also paid for their ties. All in all, my groomsmen set me back about $250 total, and they paid ~$100 each. My wife has a similar story with her bridesmaids. And every talked about how great the wedding was and how everything/everyone looked amazing. My brother even put together a legit bachelor party that only cost guys $20 to attend. We all had a blast. Point is, I have no idea how you can have no remorse for it costing each person in your wedding party $1,000 to be in your wedding. Horrible.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 4:29 pm to Jon Ham
I've been a best man once, an usher 2 times, and a groomsman 2 times as well with one more coming next year. As much as I hate spending the money that these require, if they're truly your close friends it's something I could never say no to.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 4:54 pm to Jon Ham
quote:
My girlfriend is getting ready to drop over $1,000 on her friend's wedding
A real friend wouldn't let her bridesmaids pay for more than the dress (and if it's too pricey, maybe not even that).
Things that bother me about weddings these days:
1) The markup of wedding shite has gotten as out of hand as the people planning them. When you start calling around to find out how much some of these venues, caterers, etc charge it's pretty damn outrageous.
2) If you start a GoFundMe to pay for your honeymoon, my contribution to that is your gift.
3) If you're willing to plan your wedding during a sports season, Derby/Mardi Gras, etc then don't get shitty when people don't come.
4) To add to #3 if you decide on a destination wedding, don't be pissed when I'm not gonna a few grand at attending it.
It really does make me want to elope. I'd prefer a small, small wedding with close family and friends then just have a big arse reception for everyone else.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 4:56 pm to BluegrassBelle
quote:
2) If you start a GoFundMe to pay for your honeymoon, my contribution to that is your gift.
This is a thing? How tacky.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 4:57 pm to BluegrassBelle
Oh and frick the mentality of a gift for the engagement party, a gift for the bachelor/bachelorette party, and a gift for the wedding too.
And the expectation to attend all of the above.
And the expectation to attend all of the above.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 5:01 pm to BluegrassBelle
quote:
Oh and frick the mentality of a gift for the engagement party, a gift for the bachelor/bachelorette party, and a gift for the wedding too.
And the expectation to attend all of the above.
This right here pisses me off and I usually go George Kostanza on them and make a donation in their name to a charity.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 6:28 pm to BluegrassBelle
quote:
Oh and frick the mentality of a gift for the engagement party, a gift for the bachelor/bachelorette party, and a gift for the wedding too.
shite, I gave gifts for all of those during my wedding
Between my family and I, we paid for the entire bachelor weekend, of course the rehearsal dinner, gave gifts to the wedding party including covering the tux rentals, AND made sure to have an open bar (my family is far from wealthy and it was a financial burden but it was also the right thing to do)
Seriously, unless you have some religious thing against alcohol, you had better find the money to have an open bar at your wedding. If that means cutting your guest list by 25 people then so fricking be it. You spend money on a good photographer and an open bar and let everything else fall into place
ETA: I should point out, though, that we did not have an engagement party. Your wedding is your fricking engagement party as far as I'm concerned. We just went out for dinner and drinks with the friends that were with us the night I proposed.
This post was edited on 1/19/16 at 6:41 pm
Posted on 1/19/16 at 6:34 pm to tylerdurden24
Also, do NOT ask for things other than household items that might be used in the kitchen, general upkeep of the house, or for small scale decorating if you do a registry.
Knew some people that put X Boxes and games and TVs on their wedding registry. Not surprisingly, they didn't even make it to the wedding date.
And know your guest list; if you're inviting all of your friends 5 years or less removed from college, don't go hit up the registry counter at Bloomingdales and Williams-Sonoma and Crate and Barrel. Go to fricking Bed, Bath, and Beyond or Macys like a normal person and just be happy someone cares enough to wish you well.
Knew some people that put X Boxes and games and TVs on their wedding registry. Not surprisingly, they didn't even make it to the wedding date.
And know your guest list; if you're inviting all of your friends 5 years or less removed from college, don't go hit up the registry counter at Bloomingdales and Williams-Sonoma and Crate and Barrel. Go to fricking Bed, Bath, and Beyond or Macys like a normal person and just be happy someone cares enough to wish you well.
This post was edited on 1/19/16 at 6:40 pm
Posted on 1/19/16 at 6:41 pm to Jon Ham
I don't want to hear it! My daughter lives in Great Britain and is getting married in October...see where this is going?
Bachelor party in in Vegas in April. Wedding in GB in October and then a reception back in the states in November so the poor fools who didn't make the GB trip can swing by and hand over an envelope.
Do you think I will see any of those envelopes? Here's a clue, I get one and it's marked pay in full.
Weddings are a big waste of cash. I offered big bucks if they would elope, can't have that!!! Grrrr
Bachelor party in in Vegas in April. Wedding in GB in October and then a reception back in the states in November so the poor fools who didn't make the GB trip can swing by and hand over an envelope.
Do you think I will see any of those envelopes? Here's a clue, I get one and it's marked pay in full.
Weddings are a big waste of cash. I offered big bucks if they would elope, can't have that!!! Grrrr
Posted on 1/19/16 at 6:47 pm to Numberwang
quote:
I'm of the opinion that the avg American woman wants a wedding, but not so much a marriage.
It's more basic than that. They want the attention and admiration that is bestowed on them.
Posted on 1/19/16 at 10:56 pm to tylerdurden24
quote:That is sooooo dumb.
This more than anything. It's the 21st century. If you can't bring yourself to live with the person you claim to want to marry before you're married, you're either not really that invested in marrying them or you're not mature enough to get married. You don't have to sleep with your future wife before your wedding but at least get used to how she operates behind closed doors before you commit yourself to her.
Posted on 1/20/16 at 7:17 am to tylerdurden24
quote:
Also, do NOT ask for things other than household items that might be used in the kitchen, general upkeep of the house, or for small scale decorating if you do a registry.
Not everyone needs that stuff. Me and my wife lived together for a few years before we got married. We didn't need anymore house hold items. No one is forcing you to buy anything on the registry and they have every right to ask for whatever they want.
Posted on 1/20/16 at 7:35 am to tylerdurden24
quote:
IN THE MIDDLE OF MOTHERfrickING FOOTBALL SEASON
Ha..my wedding to my ex-tater-husband was initially set on a Saturday that was Carolina's first game. I had inserts made for the invites announcing the change of date and location (changed the venue out of necessity as well) bc I was not missing the football game to get married.
First clue should have been him being a tater..second clue should have been that football was far more important than my wedding day. Though the second has not changed. If I ever took that plunge again, it would not be on a day that Carolina ball was happening. I have my priorities in order.
Posted on 1/20/16 at 7:37 am to thesoccerfanjax
Yep, and all their friends have a tight to make fun of them and not bring a present.
Posted on 1/20/16 at 7:52 am to Sneaky__Sally
quote:
Yep, and all their friends have a tight to make fun of them and not bring a present.
Exactly.
Posted on 1/20/16 at 8:11 am to Jon Ham
My wife asked her bridesmaids to spend $150 for their dresses. We had a beach wedding and we paid for their rooms. I think they got a great deal.
Sounds like your GF's friend is a bitch
Sounds like your GF's friend is a bitch
Posted on 1/20/16 at 8:13 am to airfernando
The fact that you think that is dumb astounds me
Posted on 1/20/16 at 9:08 am to Supravol22
My wife is in the wedding industry. We appreciate your business.
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