I am going in dry this off-season

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Your boyfriend is not going to appreciate that.

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Dont tell me what I appreciate!

Wut?

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I have downvoted your post and reported you. And the mods do NOTHING.

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Well that is a bald-faced lie. I scratched my arse like a dadgum champ after reading that insensitive post. Best scratch of the day, too.

And this is the thanks I get for it. Ingrates. Buncha ingrates on this boat

I'd threaten the cat o' nine tails, but some of you chucklefricks would enjoy it

I downvoted your post and reported you...but that's because I'm an a-hole.

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im the tallest one on the team so im taking the jump, didnt even come close to touching the ball. then, immediately with that first possession, i get just completely sonned with an alleyoop. it was.....enlightening

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I made Khris Middleton mad one time when my short arse canned a deep three over him. And by "over him," I mean he'd sagged deep off me in the post to go for what would have been a devastating block over my teammate. Teammate saw him coming at the last second and freaked out and threw a blind pass behind his head to me. I don't think he saw me at all, just reacted to the sledgehammer Khris was about to bring down. Ball kinda floats out to me straightaway between the circles. I'm not at Curry range, but definitely NBA range (I had been about to turn tail and try to defend an outlet pass after I saw the shot was gonna get swatted). So I grab the ball and Khris is recovering and sees me and I know he doesn't think I'll take the shot from that range. Little did he know, I have a knack for taking a couple of stupid shots a game But little did I know....that motherfricker can close distance like fricking magic. One millisecond I'm grabbing the ball and judging the distance. Next thing I know he is sprinting toward me as he realizes "this fool is actually gonna shoot." So I'm freaking out now and realizing I do not, in fact, have time to size up the shot well, and I'd better put some fricking air under it since I'm committed to the shooting motion. So I jump, and I rare it back....and back some more....and holy frick he's still gonna block it getridofitgetridofitgetridofit.....I shot that shite blind and felt the wind of his arm as he barely missed blocking it. I hung that shite HIGH, bruh. Felt like it took forever to come down.

SPLASH

Shot was so pure it tickled the damn box. And I turn around and Khris is just staring me the frick down with this cold look in his eyes while my teammates are strutting around like idiots and digging my grave deeper

I, uh, failed to score (or even get a shot off) the rest of the game. I also can neither confirm nor deny that I MIGHT have been sonned by 5 or 6 rim rattlers at my expense. Let's just leave it at that. :lol:

My favorite thing about this post is someone actually reported it

The Count