Started By
Message
re: Do you realize? . .
Posted on 9/29/21 at 9:32 am to FinleyStreet
Posted on 9/29/21 at 9:32 am to FinleyStreet
quote:
If you fart 15 times evenly throughout the day that's .625 farts per hour.
Early this morning I had a crop duster type fart that sounded like my arse was speaking in morse code. Woke the dog up he was barking like we were being attacked by terrorists. So does this count as one fart or a bunch of little farts
1
Posted on 9/29/21 at 2:00 pm to Buddy2012
quote:
Early this morning I had a crop duster type fart that sounded like my arse was speaking in morse code. Woke the dog up he was barking like we were being attacked by terrorists. So does this count as one fart or a bunch of little farts
I don't know the answer to this, but in googling things about farts I found out that farts have been clocked at a speed of 10 feet per second. Wonder who has the fastest farts on this board.
Posted on 9/29/21 at 2:06 pm to FinleyStreet
quote:
Wonder who has the fastest farts on this board.
I've got strong toots, especially after a Saturday football bender.
I'd throw my hat into the GSB fart off
Posted on 9/29/21 at 2:59 pm to Jefferson Dawg
quote:
Again, just picture a small microphone taped to every ticket holders arse cheek, and the mics are all connected to one giant bluetooth speaker. That speaker would hum with continuous fart sounds for the entire 4 hours. There'd never be one single moment of silence.
Do you see what you've reduced us to in a world with no HGMF?
This post was edited on 9/29/21 at 3:00 pm
Posted on 9/29/21 at 3:16 pm to VoxDawg
I accidentally grabbed some of that poop yogurt in the Marriott lounge and proceeded to destroy the entire cabin of an Airbus 321 from SEA-ATL later that day. My speed was 500 knots at 34,000 feet. Masks did nothing to stop it.
Posted on 9/30/21 at 7:38 am to Bleudawg
quote:
Who only farts for a 1/2 second? You should lose your Dad card if you can’t carry that thang at least 8 sec.
I doubt I've ever hit 8 seconds. Only because at about the 3 or 4 second mark I start laughing uncontrollably which immediately somehow disengages the fart control muscles and disrupts everything
Finley Street is a lady though. And societal stigmas over thousands of years have programmed women to fart in quick 1/2 second bursts. The next time you're watching a movie with your wife or girlfriend and a loud action sequence like a car chase or something begins, make immediate eye contact. Chances are she'll get really uncomfortable, because she was about to use the opportunity of the loudness to camouflage and drown out a few half-second sneak farts
Posted on 9/30/21 at 8:51 am to Peter Buck
quote:
. My speed was 500 knots at 34,000 feet. Masks did nothing to stop it.
Not to mention the circulation of airborne particles allowed those on the opposite side of the plane t appreciate it.
Posted on 9/30/21 at 6:59 pm to Jefferson Dawg
Jefferson…I’m going to try that ish and catch her in the act. 30 years of marriage….she’s so busted
Posted on 10/1/21 at 1:59 pm to Peter Buck
I was thinking on a short hop from SNA to LAS the other day - With masks on people are a bit more bold with their fart releases as long as they can pinch the noise off...Planes must really stank these days and none of us get to enjoy it. #shameful
Posted on 10/1/21 at 2:08 pm to DanaPointDawg
quote:
Do you realize?
That the reason farts are so funny is because this whole thing is just a simulation. And some programmer bot wrote it into the code as a joke.
Page 2 of 2
Latest Georgia News
Back to top
Follow SECRant for SEC Football News