Started By
Message
re: Potential FIL
Posted on 6/16/16 at 9:01 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
Posted on 6/16/16 at 9:01 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
Honestly, I kinda think you should meet him on his terms. Establish respect. I'm meeting you on your home turf and I don't give a shite is a strong message to him.
Obviously you have to consider exactly how far he'll take things but 99% of people won't take it past a point you can't handle. Especially when it's their daughters boyfriend.
Obviously you have to consider exactly how far he'll take things but 99% of people won't take it past a point you can't handle. Especially when it's their daughters boyfriend.
1
Posted on 6/16/16 at 9:06 pm to Weagle25
I appreciate the perspectives. I see it a lot less like I used to. I just informed her we are going to dinner at the spot he chose originally.
Posted on 6/16/16 at 9:30 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
Just go along and be kind and considerate but don't crawl to him. If things escalate, don't be afraid to respectfully excuse yourself from the situation. I would be willing to bet things will be fine.
Posted on 6/16/16 at 9:44 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
quote:
I appreciate the perspectives. I see it a lot less like I used to. I just informed her we are going to dinner at the s
Right call. If he acts an arse, that will be on him. Your agreeing to do it makes a big statement about your level of commitment and that should make a big impression on her entire family.
Posted on 6/16/16 at 9:47 pm to DocHoliday11
quote:
Crazy how small the world is. You from there?
No. Used to work there a good bit, and in some other small places like Tift, Crisp, Colquitt, Lowndes, Thomas Counties.
South Georgia and north Georgia are different worlds.
Posted on 6/16/16 at 11:06 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
she likes that bbc
Posted on 6/16/16 at 11:32 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
Your willingness to respect her dad despite his childish behavior tells me all I need to know. Make a reservation at a restaurant and say you wish to buy dinner. If he refuses to show up then you've done all you can do.
And if it doesn't work out I've got a 22 year old daughter who could use to meet a young man like you
And if it doesn't work out I've got a 22 year old daughter who could use to meet a young man like you
Posted on 6/17/16 at 4:07 am to dwgsfrlife7673
As the father of two daughters, I think your Gf may have made poor choices of dates/boyfriends before you. Her reluctance to tell the family about you may be because of that rather than blatant racism. He realizes that at her age anyone she sees more than a month becomes a potential future husband and it isn't his job to make you comfortable. It's his job to scare the shite out of you and make sure you are worthy of becoming the new man in her life. You are taking the most important thing in his entire life, and if you don't have the stones to go to his turf and prove yourself worthy, you aren't ready to marry his daughter. If you marry her anyway, you deserve a lifetime of him making you miserable. The old fairy tale of the knight going to slay the dragon to marry the princess wasn't really referring to an actual dragon...
Posted on 6/17/16 at 6:42 am to Old Sarge
I appreciate the compliment! In actually decided to meet on his terms so I'm going to the house this evening. Hopefully nothing explosive happens and I can get in and out still showing him regardless my color I'm not a bad guy.
I don't expect him to like me during, after, or any time after this dinner however lol.
I don't expect him to like me during, after, or any time after this dinner however lol.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 6:58 am to dwgsfrlife7673
Best of luck tonight - and I know I suggested meeting out but maybe this is for the best I really don't know honestly. It's just one of those awkward situations. You could let us know you made it out unscathed tho, that would be nice.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 7:11 am to dwgsfrlife7673
It would probably be best to meet at an agreeable restaurant for all of you the first time.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 7:33 am to dwgsfrlife7673
Good luck!
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:07 am to Old Sarge
quote:
And if it doesn't work out I've got a 22 year old daughter who could use to meet a young man like you
Pics?
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:09 am to dwgsfrlife7673
Go and kill him with kindness and respect, even if you don't get it in return. If things get heated or confrontational, grab your stuff and politely walk out. And in that event don't put your gf in a position where she has to choose to leave with you, or stay with her family. That's unfair to her.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:14 am to dwgsfrlife7673
quote:
He now believes she is a disgrace to the family
frick him.
i wouldn't meet him anywhere.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:17 am to pvilleguru
But she's easily an OT 10
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:39 am to dwgsfrlife7673
in my personal experience with racist family members - they tend to be all bark and no bite. It's as if they use it as an intimidation factor but play the intimidation really strong because they know that it would never escalate to more than that. in this case - i highly doubt he wants to subject himself nor his family to the onslaught of ridicule if anything bad were to happen. The news headlines would be crazy. best of luck and as far as the dad goes i think he is just trying to scare the shite out of you because its his baby girl and once you establish respect with the old man i would expect it to be ok.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:43 am to dwgsfrlife7673
I think this is the best way. It's not the 40s or 50s anymore, even for the most ardent racist. I'm not saying he might not say some racist shite, he could even take a swing. But he isn't going to have a shotgun on his lap. But I wouldn't expect more than him being passive aggressive.
It'll be uncomfortable, no doubt. But with your fiance and oil on your side, that will probably be the worst. He wants to make you out to be the a-hole, not him. Just don't let him bait you. He says something, just try to be the bigger man. Good manners will also make it harder for him to bait you, without coming off like a dick.
Find out what he likes to drink, if he does. Bring something to enjoy at dinner. If they don't drink, bring a dessert. If he's very racist, the nicer you are, the more it'll mess with his head. You probably won't get a hug or approval that night. But it'll make him think, and possibly make future encounters easier.
It'll be uncomfortable, no doubt. But with your fiance and oil on your side, that will probably be the worst. He wants to make you out to be the a-hole, not him. Just don't let him bait you. He says something, just try to be the bigger man. Good manners will also make it harder for him to bait you, without coming off like a dick.
Find out what he likes to drink, if he does. Bring something to enjoy at dinner. If they don't drink, bring a dessert. If he's very racist, the nicer you are, the more it'll mess with his head. You probably won't get a hug or approval that night. But it'll make him think, and possibly make future encounters easier.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:53 am to dwgsfrlife7673
quote:
He wants to do dinner. I want to do lunch. I feel it's less formal and stuffy.
Well, maybe that can be your hook on a compromise. Agree to supper but at a 'regular' restaurant.
Good luck,Bud.
Posted on 6/17/16 at 8:55 am to Stacked
quote:
Stacked
You sound like a complete horse's arse. Shut up.
Page 4 of 14
Popular
Back to top
Follow SECRant for SEC Football News