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re: Do you look down on an unmarried couple having a baby?
Posted on 1/26/14 at 3:33 pm to Dawggy_Style
Posted on 1/26/14 at 3:33 pm to Dawggy_Style
quote:
This is not a women's issue, this is a societal issue.
This is true. I have been careful to address it as an issue for society that is caused by some women.
quote:
It's rather insulting to pretend that women become pregnant by themselves.
While it takes a sperm and an egg to form a fetus, it's naive to think there aren't some women who are willing to accept a sperm donation without attaching any obligations for the donor. Don't you think?
quote:
It's also my belief that you are grossly overestimating the benefits that are available to these "women who make babies for a living."
Perhaps by your standards. However, it's obvious, based on the welfare numbers that many don't share your expectations for a proper living.
This post was edited on 1/26/14 at 3:35 pm
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Posted on 1/26/14 at 3:48 pm to Slippery Slope
1 kid, I don't look down on them, but I pity them.
More than 1 (assuming no divorces), I start to kind of judge them, though I try not to.
More than 1 (assuming no divorces), I start to kind of judge them, though I try not to.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 3:56 pm to CatFan81
quote:
Why should people get married just because they have a child? That's a horrible reason to get married and more than likely will end in divorce.
Because you have an obligation not to frick the child's life up, and everyone I've known whose parents never got married resented them for it. It's not always the case, I'm sure.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 3:58 pm to genro
quote:
A two parent household is the best thing for a child. If two people have a baby, they should commit to each other for 18 years. Regardless of their personal feelings for each other. For the child's sake.
This. There is no fighting and arguing about it. Just get over it and bottle your emotions up. Your kid takes priority over you, don't be selfish. Get divorced the second the kid is an adult, if that's what you want. Don't like it? Don't get knocked up. Just my opinion.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 4:15 pm to Slippery Slope
Depends on how tall they are.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 4:18 pm to Slippery Slope
Honestly, yeah. Plan effectively, but I also hate 19 year olds that get knocked up and married immediately. May be some hypocrisy, but 19 year olds shouldn't be having kids anyway.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 4:30 pm to AllBamaDoesIsWin
That's pretty stupid.
Like really stupid.
Like really stupid.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 4:56 pm to AllBamaDoesIsWin
I mean, if the parents can't stand each other, it will create a toxic environment at home,non matter how much they bottle their emotions. As a product of a divorced home, I can tell you that those fights are not fun.
Btw my parents waited a few years before they had me and my brother.
Btw my parents waited a few years before they had me and my brother.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 5:59 pm to Carolina Tide
Well then they need to grow up. It can be an almost professional relationship. You can be totally unaffectionate and businesslike. You can have separate social lives. You can sleep in separate rooms. But when it comes to raising the child, be a fricking adult and develop a cooperative partnership. Just for this one aspect.
People do this for their careers all the time - they spend every waking moment for years tolerating someone they can't stand. They do it for money. They can't do it for their developing child?
A developing, growing child NEEDS a mother and a father. Much more so than you need whatever it is you think you need from the other person based on emotion.
Suck it up and understand that this is your goddamn human creation; it is literally the most advanced, amazing, incredible, complex thing in the known universe. And it's fricking yours. Your flesh and blood. You can't put your feelings aside for that? Jesus Christ.
FYI, I didn't say all divorce was bad. If one of the parents is destructive to them self or others or most importantly the child, then divorce is entirely appropriate. If there are no young kids, then i dont give a shite. But parents with developing children, ripping the kids' lives apart only because they "don't get along"? Extremely selfish and shameful.
People do this for their careers all the time - they spend every waking moment for years tolerating someone they can't stand. They do it for money. They can't do it for their developing child?
A developing, growing child NEEDS a mother and a father. Much more so than you need whatever it is you think you need from the other person based on emotion.
Suck it up and understand that this is your goddamn human creation; it is literally the most advanced, amazing, incredible, complex thing in the known universe. And it's fricking yours. Your flesh and blood. You can't put your feelings aside for that? Jesus Christ.
FYI, I didn't say all divorce was bad. If one of the parents is destructive to them self or others or most importantly the child, then divorce is entirely appropriate. If there are no young kids, then i dont give a shite. But parents with developing children, ripping the kids' lives apart only because they "don't get along"? Extremely selfish and shameful.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 6:06 pm to Slippery Slope
I don't look down, but I think it's unfortunate for all involved.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 6:10 pm to Slippery Slope
quote:
Do you look down on an unmarried couple having a baby?
Sure doesn't the bible teach us too.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 7:28 pm to BarberitosDawg
My BiL and SiL got pregnant then married.
Still in a committed relationship to this day.
I look down a bit on one night stand parents that never gave it a chance.
I know it's old fashioned but I think it's a good idea not to sleep with somebody you can't see yourself raising a child with. I'd have that opinion if I wasn't a Christian.
Still in a committed relationship to this day.
I look down a bit on one night stand parents that never gave it a chance.
I know it's old fashioned but I think it's a good idea not to sleep with somebody you can't see yourself raising a child with. I'd have that opinion if I wasn't a Christian.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 7:30 pm to 3nOut
I'm not getting married.
Marriage totally kills my chances of getting laid by different chicks.
Marriage totally kills my chances of getting laid by different chicks.
Posted on 1/26/14 at 8:15 pm to Slippery Slope
quote:Yes, but not necessarily because of the baby situation by itself.
Do you look down on an unmarried couple having a baby?
It's just a symptom of a bigger problem we have of a society of perpetual children who don't understand that actions have consequences. Adults are very immature these days and everyone thinks they can do whatever they want and not have to live with the results. Abortion has propagated this idea, but the biggest contributor is a lack of good parenting and a nanny state that takes care of people for making stupid choices and doesn't encourage people to change their behavior and think before they act.
The entire culture we live in promotes doing what you want and ignoring consequences. It's ridiculous. People are coddled and stupid. They make stupid decisions and aren't allowed to suffer the consequences alone. They get money from the government to keep on living (yeah, the standard of living is pretty low, but it's a lot better than the same situation in Africa or other 3rd world countries), and then they elect representatives who will give them more money and benefits to support their bad decisions. Those people then go on to be bad parents whose children continue the same cycle.
Obviously this is a generalization, but it's more true than not. "Do what feels good" is the motto that will end in the eventual demise of this country. That and possibly "YOLO".
Posted on 1/26/14 at 8:25 pm to Slippery Slope
I think people should be married if having a baby.
Posted on 1/27/14 at 12:44 pm to Slippery Slope
I'm ok with it as long as they're not gay.
Posted on 1/27/14 at 12:56 pm to Slippery Slope
No. Being unmarried or married has no bearing on how good of a parent someone is. No doubt kids raised in a 2-parent home have a much better shot at succeeding in life, but that is not absolute. Plenty of successful people have come from single-parent homes, and plenty of failures have come from 2 parent homes. What matters is what those parents do once the child is born.
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