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RollBanaRoll: Meltdown - Iron Bowl Edition

Posted on 12/3/19 at 11:54 am
Posted by WilliamTaylor21
2720 Arse Whipping Avenue
Member since Dec 2013
35936 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 11:54 am
LINK

There are quite a few - so I will sort some of my favorites:

Funny Melts:
quote:

- WHICH ONE OF YOU COWARDS shite MY PANTS


- For the 6th straight year Alabama doesn’t have to stress about being picked for the playoff


- I don’t know guys. Can we really leave out the team with the 2 best quality loses out of the CFP? I still got Bama at #4


- Tennessee has won at Jordan-Hare more recently than Alabama has. This has been fun facts time, I’m gonna go jump balls first into a stack of unsterilized needles.


- I think we played it smart. Why risk another kick six when you can just hit it off the upright, thus preventing the possibility of a return?



Mad Melts:
quote:

- The ol’ constant PI until you get a pick six strategy. fricking classic barn


- According to Bill Connelly Auburn had a six percent chance to win the game. A SIX frickING PERCENT CHANCE WHAT IN THE EAGLE frickING A TIGER DEVIL MAGIC IS THIS shite??!?!?


- Unbelievable. I’ve been crucified for saying that coach Nick Saban is in over his head, but that guy does not deserve to coach my crimson tide anymore.


- What an awful coaching performance by Nick Saban! Giving up 48 points to a horrific Auburn offense and he STILL hasn’t found a kicker. HE MUST GO! #FireSaban


- This is enough!! Saban has lost this team and doesn’t know what he’s doing anymore! 48 POINTS AGAINST AUBURN! It’s time to move on before the program is lost! #FireSaban


- If this scenario was flipped and bama got a free field goal we’d have to shut down the whole goddamn internet


*these don't compare to the melts found ITT



Chernobyl:
quote:

- Eventually the AUburn bullshite has to run out… right? Like the devil is past due on collecting some goddamn barner souls. I swear in the next 5 years the devil say to himself “Alright Gus you motherfricker you’re past due,” Half the auburn players will start shitting themselves as Malzahn slowly walks to midfield in the middle of a play. Everyone stops and watches as his eyes turn the brightest shade of green the earth has ever seen. Fans and players watch on in horror as Gus makes noises too horrible to come from a human body. The players on the field run back to their sidelines as the noises grow louder and louder and Gus begins to levitate off the ground. Below him the ground starts to rumble, then splits open as Gus Malzahn starts descending slowly into the depths of hell while screaming “NO DON’T TAKE ME, IT WASN’T WORTH IT PLEASE TAKE CHIZIK INSTEAD!!!” His pleas fall on deaf ears as the ground closes up and swallows him whole. All the spectators watch on in stunned silence, then slowly the teams and fans walk out of the stadium, unable to ever forget what they saw. Auburn immediately shuts down the university and the town is permanently evacuated. The army launches a nuclear bomb into the permanently vacated town formerly known as auburn just for good measure. A governmental blockade is permanently placed around the area and a metal dome forever covers the area to dissuade any from visiting the relics left from that time. Legend says the only things remaining after the nuclear blast were a waffle house sign, charred bits of an auburn visor, and a few feathers from an eagle.


Posted by VolsOut4Harambe
Atlanta, GA
Member since Sep 2017
12856 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 11:55 am to
Inbreeding does bad things to the brain.
Posted by labamafan
Prairieville
Member since Jan 2007
24267 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 11:58 am to
First few are funny the last group was pathetic.
Posted by thatguy45
Your alter's mom's basement
Member since Sep 2017
18897 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:01 pm to
quote:

This has been fun facts time, I’m gonna go jump balls first into a stack of unsterilized needles.

Do all Bama fans aim to castrate themselves after a loss?
Posted by biclops
Member since Oct 2011
6149 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:05 pm to
quote:

Do all Bama fans aim to castrate themselves after a loss?


If we did, we'd just hit the uprights.
Posted by BamaTide126728
Member since Oct 2019
317 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:06 pm to
Best joke I’ve heard all day
Posted by skrayper
21-0 Asterisk Drive
Member since Nov 2012
31014 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:07 pm to
Surely you could have found about 24.5 worth copying.
Posted by Rougarou13
Brookhaven MS
Member since Feb 2015
6839 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:07 pm to
quote:

Do we have a kicker that can make a FG of > 30 yards today?
Might need it.


A little foreshadowing on the second page...
Posted by deaux
Member since Oct 2018
20267 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:08 pm to
quote:

WHICH ONE OF YOU COWARDS shite MY PANTS


Posted by jvilletiger25
jacksonville, fl
Member since Jan 2014
17039 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:09 pm to
quote:

- Unbelievable. I’ve been crucified for saying that coach Nick Saban is in over his head, but that guy does not deserve to coach my crimson tide anymore.


Posted by BamaTide126728
Member since Oct 2019
317 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:10 pm to
Just extend Gus already. Oh and make you he gets an extra large buyout
Posted by biclops
Member since Oct 2011
6149 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:13 pm to
Every once in a while, meltdown time is pure gold. This is one of those times.
Posted by CaptSpaulding
Member since Feb 2012
6533 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:14 pm to
quote:

If this scenario was flipped and bama got a free field goal we’d have to shut down the whole goddamn internet


Posted by DonaldDuckworth
Florida
Member since Jul 2017
1508 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:18 pm to
This, and UGA’s meteoric rise to epic, unmatched douchebaggery, is why I hate UGA far more than Bama. I’m not even sure I can say I hate Bama anymore. The fan base as a whole has improved in leaps and bounds over the last few years.
Posted by jvilletiger25
jacksonville, fl
Member since Jan 2014
17039 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:18 pm to
quote:

Just extend Gus already. Oh and make you he gets an extra large buyout



It's not going to happen, but why would any Bama fan want that? Gus biannually owns Saban.
Posted by biclops
Member since Oct 2011
6149 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:19 pm to
quote:

This, and UGA’s meteoric rise to epic, unmatched douchebaggery, is why I hate UGA far more than Bama. I’m not even sure I can say I hate Bama anymore. The fan base as a whole has improved in leaps and bounds over the last few years.


Not many here will agree with you, but I appreciate the kind words anyway.
Posted by LSURulzSEC
Lake Charles via Oakdale
Member since Aug 2004
77436 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:23 pm to
quote:

- I don’t know guys. Can we really leave out the team with the 2 best quality loses out of the CFP? I still got Bama at #4


This person just needs to be curb stomped...

Yes Gumptard, quality losses supersede quality wins...gotdamn!!!!
Posted by biclops
Member since Oct 2011
6149 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:24 pm to
quote:

This person just needs to be curb stomped...

Yes Gumptard, quality losses supersede quality wins...gotdamn!!!!


Sarcasm. Do you speak it?
Posted by LSURulzSEC
Lake Charles via Oakdale
Member since Aug 2004
77436 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:28 pm to
Ok Bama!
Posted by BrerTiger
Valley of the Long Grey Cloud
Member since Sep 2011
21506 posts
Posted on 12/3/19 at 12:31 pm to
quote:

I think we played it smart. Why risk another kick six when you can just hit it off the upright, thus preventing the possibility of a return?


Gold, Jerry.

quote:

The ol’ constant PI until you get a pick six strategy. fricking classic barn


I actually thought this to myself when it happened. It was fantastic Steele-tegery.

quote:

WHAT IN THE EAGLE frickING A TIGER DEVIL MAGIC IS THIS shite


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