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Swamp Crotch prevention (Alahunter, help has come)

Posted on 8/16/13 at 10:38 am
Posted by FleshEatingSalsa
Floating down the Anduin
Member since Dec 2009
12293 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 10:38 am
quote:

It’s a problem that has plagued men ever since Western society decided the male of our species had to wear pants instead of breezy togas or kilts. I’m talking about swamp crotch: an uncomfortably moist nether region in which irritating chafing and stickage become commonplace and a distinct vinegar odor permeates from your groin.

Outbreaks of swamp crotch typically occur during hot and humid summers. Men who spend hours working hard in hot conditions — like soldiers and construction workers — are most susceptible to swamp crotch, though it can also strike men who spend a lot of time sitting — like motorcyclists, delivery truck drivers, and even office workers.

As a lifelong resident of perpetually hot and humid Oklahoma, I’ve had to battle swamp crotch every summer for most of my life. And I know that there are millions of men out there who are suffering silently from this summertime plague. The problem is that while there are plenty of products out there designed to prevent swamp crotch, nobody has really taken the time to test how effective each one is. As a result, men end up wasting money on products that offer sub-par results.

So this summer as a service to men everywhere, I decided I would scientifically test various swamp crotch prevention products and offer my unbiased findings. And by “scientifically” I mean I applied all of these products to my balls.


LINK






quote:

and a distinct vinegar odor permeates from your groin
Posted by Kentucker
Cincinnati, KY
Member since Apr 2013
19351 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 11:02 am to
Gold Bond.
Posted by Alahunter
Member since Jan 2008
90739 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 11:09 am to
Personalized pocket fan, ftw.



































Posted by Hugo Stiglitz
Member since Oct 2010
72937 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 11:26 am to
Back when I was working in the kitchens, we used good old corn starch.

One handful, two good pats, no hand relief.

Worked every time.
Posted by Bellabama
Omnipotent, Omniscient, Omnipresent
Member since Nov 2009
30878 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 11:31 am to
Dreadful visual images. I don't think guys would like a thread about swamp twat.
Posted by lsu480
Downtown Scottsdale
Member since Oct 2007
92877 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 12:50 pm to
Gold Bond Medicated powder FTMFW!!!!
Posted by MagillaGuerilla
Nick Fairley Fan Club, Founder
Member since Nov 2009
35448 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 2:58 pm to
I was sweating this problem for my upcoming weekend costumed excursion to Dragon Con, now a proud owner of a tube of "Fresh Balls".

Unfortunately, under the tab "Where did you here about us?", FleshEatingSalsa was not an option. So no royalties to you I'm afraid.

They've also got "Fresh Feet" and "Fresh Breast"
Posted by CatFan81
Decatur, GA
Member since May 2009
47188 posts
Posted on 8/16/13 at 7:49 pm to
This thread is weird. Really weird.

Not quite as weird as GTHTSUN though. He's in his own special category of weird.
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