re: SECRant March Madness Bracket: Final 4 (VOTE HERE) (WALKING DEAD SPOILERS PAGE 23-END)

Holy shite! That's it!

Diddly is Lew's illegitimate bastard child.

SummerOfGeorge vs WilliamTaylor21 

momentoftruth87 vs Ted2010 

SECRant Tournament results and Summary of Games from Friday, 20 March 2020

Final: DiddlyDawg7 15 - SummerOfGeorge 43
In the first match up of the night, the first of the two favorites to win the SECRant Tournament was defeated. The BullPups of Diddlydawg7 were the early season favorites to take home the crown, but the team played last night as though they had run out of toilet paper at the team hotel and in the locker room. Watching the game, DD7's players ran from end to end of the court with butt-cheeks squinched and were often seen tugging on their shorts as if to keep them from sticking. The SummerOfGeorge Bloody Mammoths showed no mercy as the SOG team erupted in multiple scoring runs to defeat the Bull Pups by nearly tripling the opponent's score. (There is some question, however, about the Red Mammoth Club having made a few phone calls to mafia bosses and bookies. Suspected RMC enforcer, Uncle Vito, was seen sitting in the stands near the BullPup bench and whispering to the DD7 coach during several points in the action while handing him what appeared to be US currency.)

Final: BoarEd 16 - WilliamTaylor21 39
The rivalry between the states of Arkansas and Louisiana saw tempers flare on the court yesterday evening as the WilliamTaylor21 Wampus Cats hosted the Warthogs of BoarEd. Both teams were seeded highly in the first round and it's no surprise to anyone that both teams had made it this far.
The score was close early and the lead exchanged hands throughout the first half, but WT21 pulled ahead and ran away with the game in the second half as players from BoarEd appeared to have trouble even seeing the basket from the floor after emerging from the locker room at the end of the half.

The BoarEd players appeared to be weeping and it was clear to the folks in the stands that their eyes were watering heavily. The players and coaches have been mum about whether any bad news was relayed to the team during the half. The team manager did, however, mention that they had noticed a light red power on their towels at halftime and that the team's eyes started burning and their noses running shortly before the beginning of the second half. It was also noted that the full container of cayenne pepper that had been sitting near the WT21 bench was more than half empty during the second half.

The BoarEd Athletic Director has called for an investigation into whether there were any halftime shenanigans played by fans or staff from the WilliamTaylor21 team. It remains to be seen whether such an investigation will take place since word from SECR offices is that they saw nothing warranting a review. BoarEd fans have been noted as saying that it's unfair and that the only reason there is no SECR probe is because SECR offices are headquartered in Baton Rouge. Some Warthog fans are calling for the erection of billboards along I-40, I-20, and I-10, as well as inside Baton Rouge city limits in order to call attention to perceived favoritism toward the Wampus Cats. Wampus Cat fans responded by calling Warthog fans "copy cats."

Final: momentoftruth87 30 HailState15 25
In the closest game of the evening, the momentoftruth87 Shoats defeated the Cinderella team of the tournament in double overtime. HailState87, a team that held the university's hopes and dreams for its first championship ever, fought valiantly but came up short when mot87 came alive with new energy and determination in the second overtime period.
Prior to tip off, the teams' respective mascots got into a scuffle on the floor. "Piglet," the live Shoat mascot from mot87 got his newly grown tusks hooked in the maroon sweats worn by HS15's young bulldog mascot, "Cowbell."

Although a little bit rattled by the perceived aggression on the part of Piglet, Cowbell shook it off and proceeded to walk over and urinate on the supports of the goal on the left side of the coliseum. A second scuffle between Cowbell and Piglet ended with Piglet suffering a torn ear while Cowbell's upper lip was pierced by Piglet's new, and very sharp, tusks. The game proceeded slowly due to many official time outs being called to mop the floor where Cowbell could not contain the his slobber, for which bulldogs are typically known, due to the injury to his mouth.

After the game, there were no hard feeling between the teams as they met for slow-cooked BBQ before settling down to watch the final game of the night. True sportsmanship abounds even in this day and age despite tiffs between mascots.

Final: Ted2010 27 - LewDawg 20
In the final match-up of the night, surprise was in store for the eleven fans that packed the 22,000 seat coliseum as they watched second seeded LewDawg fall to a very respectable Ted2010 team. Along with Diddlydawg7, LewDawg was considered a favorite to win the tournament, but it was not to be. LewDawg's "Silver Britches" team had enjoyed a great regular season fulfilling all the predictions that they would win the East Division of the SECRant, but the "Pachyderms" of Ted2010, feeling disrespected, would not be denied - even without their head coach, Gump Sanders, who had fallen ill after being unable to obtain toilet paper or hand sanitizer after the previous day's matchup. Former (now retired) Pachyderm head coach, Limp Sanderson, filled in for Gump and coached the Ted2010 team to a victory fueled by pure emotion as the Pachyderms defeated the Silver Britches in a game that was decided by a dominating and unprecedented offensive and defensive rebounding effort by the Ted2010 team.

During player interviews after the game, Pachyderm players cited their determination as being the result of hearing the insults hurled at their fill-in coach regarding the 1970s-style polyester double knit plaid jacket he was wearing, along with shouts of, "Sit down, Limp!" being made from the stands.

Tonight's Final Four can be followed on the SECRant Network.



And now for my picks tonight:

SummerOfGeorge vs WilliamTaylor21

momentoftruth87 vs Ted2010

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If anyone wants to provide a 2 or 3 sentence synopsis of that novel it would be greatly appreciated.

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Ted cheated

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summer of George punching a 3 year old

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For a package of paper towels. So disappointed, thought you were better than that

SummerOfGeorge vs WilliamTaylor21

momentoftruth87 vs Ted2010

I live near Atlanta and was hoping to get inside to watch the Final Four of the SEC Rant this weekend, but Mayor Keisha Lance Bottoms has forbidden any gatherings of more than 50 people within city limits.

Might there be a play-by-play broadcast of the games on the SECR Network?

Of course, I'm hoping to see the Wampus Cats bring home the trophy, but the competition at this point looks tough. Still, it might be fun to see the Bloody Mammoths face off against their in state rivals, the Pachyderms.

I really need to follow these games closely since the Chattahoochee River NRA is now shut down from Buford Dam all the way to Sandy Springs and there's no trout fishing to be had without driving up to Helen.

If someone has credentials to sneak into the games, whether real or nicely Photoshopped, I'd be willing to pay in real toilet paper to have them to get in!

Yeah. It was mentioned on NGTO.org this morning. Photos showed McGinnis Ferry ramp already blocked off. I usually head out from the ramp at Jones Bridge, but I'm sure it's locked up now as well. No biggie, though. Corps of Engineers is running a constant release from Buford Dam until further notice, so even with DNR stocking trout there yesterday it doesn't look like it's going to be fishable for a while longer.

If you were thinking of heading that way, do you hit the river for trout often? I may have some room in the boat later this spring and summer when my wife doesn't feel like going to the river. I'll save the front seat for you.

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he did it in the Sweet 16 because he was losing big time and couldn't handle not winning an internet message board bracket.

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So I'm the one that was losing big time in the 2and round and so I changed the voting method and started over again so I could win? Wait, that wasn't me, that was you.