What's Everyone's Lineage?

I'm Nazi/Huron Indian.

Half German, Quarter Swede, Eighth Scottish, Eighth English. Identify most with German because my last name is extremely German.

Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

My sister had her DNA done and got her results last week.
England, Wales, and Northwestern Europe, Ireland and Scotland, and Germanic Europe.

1/2 German
1/4 Scottish
1/4 English

Yea it’s crazy how they’re doing that now. Turns out your DNA is not private at all when you send it in.

Prost.

The German side is distinctly Bavarian.

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Congrats on your other relatives conviction for a crime from 20 years ago.

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Yeah, I told her it was a mistake.

Yep, the health and life insurance companies are next up to try to get it. This was a door of popular science that was better left closed. We really didn’t need a business just to tell every basic bitch white person that they’re not actually part Cherokee, I’m willing to do that for free.

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We really didn’t need a business just to tell every basic bitch white person that they’re not actually part Cherokee, I’m willing to do that for free.

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So fricking true.