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re: OT: Anyone ever been through a divorce here?
Posted on 3/6/14 at 11:03 pm to Ole Geauxt
Posted on 3/6/14 at 11:03 pm to Ole Geauxt
No, I think sausage & cheese, tho. Seems like they had good corn dogs.
Posted on 3/6/14 at 11:09 pm to Arkla Missy
well, thinking about teddy bears Eggs is making me sleepy.
H e,, things will become clearer each day..
gnite boys and gulls.
H e,, things will become clearer each day..
gnite boys and gulls.
Posted on 3/6/14 at 11:13 pm to Ole Geauxt
Nitey nite then. In y'all's honor I'm taking a break from a project and enjoying eggs and cheese, bacon, grits, toast with grape jelly, coffee, and orange juice.
Posted on 3/6/14 at 11:15 pm to Litigator
I ont sum, but cut the jelly and coffee, add butter and cold milk..
Posted on 3/7/14 at 12:04 am to Hawgeye
With the exception of situations involving your kids, forget the ex. She's the next guy's problem.
Make sure you get the best lawyer you can afford.
If you don't have one already...get a dog.
Make sure you get the best lawyer you can afford.
If you don't have one already...get a dog.
This post was edited on 3/7/14 at 5:08 am
Posted on 3/7/14 at 8:54 am to Hawgeye
quote:
I was raised by very modest, wealthy parents and grand parents. As far back as I can remember, I was about 7 or 8....my dad said to me....Son, if someone is trying really hard to look wealthy, they're actually in a lot of debt and have no money. It may look like they have something, but they really don't.
This is so true.
My father comes from timber money through my grandfather's family, but my grandfather always drove a beat-up Chevrolet and refused to get the power door locks fixed because "why would I spend money on that, I didn't have power locks until the 1990s!" My wife's father is the same way -- makes *high* six figures and has for year, buys almost all of his clothes at Walmart and drives a 1998 Toyota Tacoma beater that looks like it's about to fall apart Blues Brothers style. His reasoning for never getting rid of it: "it pays me back every month. I'd rather have a car payment of $0 than a car payment at all - I'm not trying to impress anyone." He lives in a modest, paid off house and stocks money in savings like crazy.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:10 am to Hawgeye
quote:No, I don't think so. You should never ask yourself, "Am I spending enough money?" The only question that is valid is, "Am I saving and investing enough money?"
Maybe this is the problem....I don't spend enough? Who the hell knows....
That begs the question, what's enough? The answer depends on your goals regarding retirement age and income, and how much you need in liquid emergency savings to cover your immediate costs of living if you were to lose your ability to earn income for some reason (unforeseen loss of job, loss of business, disability, etc).
If you've got your financial bases covered, then how much you spend after that is totally up to you, and you should never feel bad about saving more than you think you'll need.
Living modestly is more virtuous and admirable than living extravagantly, IMO.
This post was edited on 3/7/14 at 9:17 am
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:33 am to Feral
This reminds me of my maternal grandfather. He had an extremely lucrative career, and invested very, very well, but growing up, I remember my grandparents having 2 vehicles, plus my grandfather's "work car" in 23 years. He was so "thrifty" that he even had the dealership find a car without a radio when he bought the second vehicle.
The local bank president, chairman of the credit union, and other "town dignitaries" would stop by my grandparents' usually monthly to visit (suck up), yet he would go out of his way to go to the grocery store that carried generic foods, not store brands, but the items that were so generic they were packaged in white boxes/containers with black letters.
We used to get a kick out of that considering he owned significant stock in many food companies, and was a pro at vegetable gardening, but it did not amuse my grandmother, who was an excellent cook, and wanted high quality ingredients when doing so. She finally put her foot down, and he was forbidden to grocery shop.
I have no doubt that if he was still alive today, he'd be one of those extreme couponers, clipping the Sunday paper, and printing out online coupons right after tuning in to the closing bell stock market report every afternoon.
The local bank president, chairman of the credit union, and other "town dignitaries" would stop by my grandparents' usually monthly to visit (suck up), yet he would go out of his way to go to the grocery store that carried generic foods, not store brands, but the items that were so generic they were packaged in white boxes/containers with black letters.
We used to get a kick out of that considering he owned significant stock in many food companies, and was a pro at vegetable gardening, but it did not amuse my grandmother, who was an excellent cook, and wanted high quality ingredients when doing so. She finally put her foot down, and he was forbidden to grocery shop.
I have no doubt that if he was still alive today, he'd be one of those extreme couponers, clipping the Sunday paper, and printing out online coupons right after tuning in to the closing bell stock market report every afternoon.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:38 am to wmr
quote:
Another great bit of advice. I'd strongly recommend against Christian or otherwise religious counseling.
Agreed, and I say that as a happily married Catholic.
Plus, my father is sort of in situation similar to that of Hawgeye's -- married to an unstable woman whom he needs to divorce ASAP -- but he started going to counseling sessions with his priest and was told (obviously) they needed to work it out despite her being unstable.
I'm a Catholic, but I'll be the first to tell you to never take marriage advice from someone who isn't married and can never get married. It's like taking deer hunting pointers from someone at PETA.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:43 am to Hog on the Hill
quote:
If you've got your financial bases covered, then how much you spend after that is totally up to you, and you should never feel bad about saving more than you think you'll need.
Living modestly is more virtuous and admirable than living extravagantly, IMO
This is so true. One thing I've always hated is going to someone's house and they take you through it talking about how much this rug cost or how expensive that chandelier was -- it's just dumb, transparent extravagance.
My wife and I prefer to go to people's houses and them say "oh you like that lamp? I got that lamp for $5 at HomeGoods!"
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:44 am to Feral
quote:
I'm a Catholic
me too- but i won't pretend i go to church regularly.
my only other comment than before is don't stay together for the kid. i don't mean that as callous as it sounds, in fact, i mean it the opposite. i grew up wishing my parents were divorced kids would rather you be happy than miserable in the long run.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:47 am to piggilicious
quote:
me too- but i won't pretend i go to church regularly.
my only other comment than before is don't stay together for the kid. i don't mean that as callous as it sounds, in fact, i mean it the opposite. i grew up wishing my parents were divorced kids would rather you be happy than miserable in the long run.
Oh I agree - I just threw out the "I'm Catholic" line as a way to show that I'm objectively going against the grain of the church in that I'm recommending Hawgeye to get divorced and the collective on here to avoid faith-based counseling. My dad is one of those "I'm Catholic, ergo I have to believe and do everything the church tells me" sort of people, and it's counter-intuitive and can often be harmful in circumstances like his. Catholics often tend to be that way.
This post was edited on 3/7/14 at 9:49 am
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:51 am to Feral
Buy a fire-proof safe.
Always get at least $40 extra at Walgreens, Wal-Mart, etc. Then also take out some at the ATM now and then. Bury that sucker in a barn or under a brushpile or somewhere you know its safe.
Do this for at least a year. At least you'll have a few thousand stuck back that she can't touch.
These are the things I think about. I'm damaged goods.
Always get at least $40 extra at Walgreens, Wal-Mart, etc. Then also take out some at the ATM now and then. Bury that sucker in a barn or under a brushpile or somewhere you know its safe.
Do this for at least a year. At least you'll have a few thousand stuck back that she can't touch.
These are the things I think about. I'm damaged goods.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 9:52 am to Arkla Missy
quote:
This reminds me of my maternal grandfather. He had an extremely lucrative career, and invested very, very well, but growing up, I remember my grandparents having 2 vehicles, plus my grandfather's "work car" in 23 years. He was so "thrifty" that he even had the dealership find a car without a radio when he bought the second vehicle.
The local bank president, chairman of the credit union, and other "town dignitaries" would stop by my grandparents' usually monthly to visit (suck up), yet he would go out of his way to go to the grocery store that carried generic foods, not store brands, but the items that were so generic they were packaged in white boxes/containers with black letters.
We used to get a kick out of that considering he owned significant stock in many food companies, and was a pro at vegetable gardening, but it did not amuse my grandmother, who was an excellent cook, and wanted high quality ingredients when doing so. She finally put her foot down, and he was forbidden to grocery shop.
I have no doubt that if he was still alive today, he'd be one of those extreme couponers, clipping the Sunday paper, and printing out online coupons right after tuning in to the closing bell stock market report every afternoon.
That's hilarious.
My father-in-law sort of borders on cheap at times, and it's been a running gag in our family and has sort of become his shtick (though "cheap" is sort of an undeserved reputation since he often pays for everyone's meals and foots the bill for trips and stuff).
His running joke is to repurpose birthday/Christmas/Father's Day cards and send them to my wife's grandmother. He'll send her a Father's Day card and mark out the word "Father's" and write "Birth" and white-out the written words underneath and say something like "I got this card a few months ago and figured I'd reuse it, Happy Birthday Mom!" My wife's grandmother gets an absolute kick out of it.
Sometimes he'll get a box of chocolates from one of his employees for Valentines Day, so he'll eat a few out of it and then send it to his mother. It's a hoot.
This post was edited on 3/7/14 at 9:53 am
Posted on 3/7/14 at 10:55 am to wmr
quote:
wmr
Thanks for your honest opinions regarding this matter. It's a different world these days.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 11:03 am to Hawgeye
Thanks for reminding me why I'll never get married.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 11:30 am to bpfergu
quote:
Thanks for reminding me why I'll never get married.
Quality companionship doesn't require a license from the county clerk. In the legal sense, marriage is a contract that has nothing to do with love and commitment.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 11:35 am to Porky
an upscale duplex type of thing with one maybe two 'community' rooms connecting one side with the other. that is the perfect ideal situation for man and woman, imo.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 11:42 am to piggilicious
quote:
an upscale duplex type of thing with one maybe two 'community' rooms connecting one side with the other. that is the perfect ideal situation for man and woman, imo.
Posted on 3/7/14 at 11:49 am to piggilicious
my granddaddy was a durt poar arse feller cuttin' trees and tryin' to grow cotton in the NELA red clay, hills.
my daddy was a durt poar arse feller.
imma durt poar arse feller.
undoubtedly, my kids are not durt poar arse, at least they think they're not.
my daddy was a durt poar arse feller.
imma durt poar arse feller.
undoubtedly, my kids are not durt poar arse, at least they think they're not.
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