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thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
quote:

Just the thought of my body parts being near her pee or poop holes at some point in the evening was enough to turn me off of even trying to see the bewbs.



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KSGamecock
UAB Fan
Dragon Lair
Member since May 2012
21140 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
It’s disrespectful to poop on a first date.


DownSouthJukin
UAB Fan
Terra pericolosa
Member since Jan 2014
14678 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
It's also disrespectful to loudly announce in a bar full of people, "I've got to take a shit!"

Here's the whole story:

So I worked with a good-looking country gal who was always trying to set me up with her friends because she and I were in the friend zone. Whatever.

She showed me a picture of this girl and I said, "why not?"

The girl insisted on driving to my apartment to meet me. OK. Fine. She did.

When she arrived, I asked her where she wanted to eat. She said, "Red Lobster." She had obviously already been thinking about it. I'm not a fan, and this should have been a sign, but I was going to take this country girl with big hooters tucked into a fuzzy sweater to her chosen restaurant.

We went the the Lobster. She plowed through the cheese biscuits and her meal like she didn't know when her next meal would be. I was impressed because she wasn't a big gal.

Then we went the bar to meet some friends. It was a nice place. We're all hanging out at the bar, drinking, talking, etc., and she grabbed me and said, "I have to use the bathroom."

I pointed toward the restrooms and told her, "The bathroom is over there."

She stood there.

A couple minutes later she grabbed me again and said the same thing. I told her the same thing. And then she said that we needed to go so she can use the bathroom. I asked her to hold on while I finished my drink.

About two minutes later, we go through the same process, and then she got a stern look on her face and announced in an extremely loud voice, "I've got to take a shit!" There was a lull in the conversation when she did it, so everyone in the place heard it.

The record stopped and you could hear a pin drop. The bartenders start dying laughing as did my friends. I asked for my check and we hauled ass.

We got to my apartment and she bee-lined to the bathroom and absolutely destroyed it. She was in there for 10 minutes. When she came out, the turd smell was all over her.

She asked me if I wanted to go back out to meet my friends, and I was like, "nah." Then she grabbed me and started trying to make out with me. I told her I didn't feel well and that she probably needed to go home, so I walked her out to her car.

I never talked to her again.
This post was edited on 2/10 at 10:51 pm


thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
Hey, she was a woman of action


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KSGamecock
UAB Fan
Dragon Lair
Member since May 2012
21140 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
Your face must have been priceless.


thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
DSJ post poo comment


DownSouthJukin
UAB Fan
Terra pericolosa
Member since Jan 2014
14678 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
That's a good representation of me after she left.


KSGamecock
UAB Fan
Dragon Lair
Member since May 2012
21140 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
That’s a very relatable picture for me in general.


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thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
quote:

She plows through the cheese biscuits and her meal like she doesn't know when her next meal will be



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KSGamecock
UAB Fan
Dragon Lair
Member since May 2012
21140 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
She owed you at least a BJ after that ordeal.


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DownSouthJukin
UAB Fan
Terra pericolosa
Member since Jan 2014
14678 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
Yeah, well, all she gave me was a BM.
This post was edited on 2/10 at 9:10 pm


KSGamecock
UAB Fan
Dragon Lair
Member since May 2012
21140 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
:rotflmao:


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thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
Lesson learned, when the woman is driving to your apartment before dinner make the cheddar bay biscuits yourself


thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
quote:

all she gave me was a BM.



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KSGamecock
UAB Fan
Dragon Lair
Member since May 2012
21140 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
I can make those. Been snacking on them all week. So good. Gonna give some to Ms.3K


thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
quote:

Gonna give some to Ms.3K

If she eats them without destroying your bathroom you know you've done good


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DownSouthJukin
UAB Fan
Terra pericolosa
Member since Jan 2014
14678 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
quote:

Gonna give some to Ms.3K


Better stock up on TP and Febreze.


Harry Rex Vonner
Arkansas Fan
Gumps, who is the Rounders boy?
Member since Nov 2013
9502 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
looks like a really good thread right here


DownSouthJukin
UAB Fan
Terra pericolosa
Member since Jan 2014
14678 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
'Tis.


thatguy45
Kentucky Fan
Your Mom
Member since Sep 2017
9020 posts

re: Hey all you OT pussies-get the frick up and get on the board
This thread has taken some turns
We've covered
-drinking
-sonic
-music
-musicians
-choosing usernames
-choosing kids' names
-England vs Germany
-WW1
-WW2
-Manifest Destiny
-Shia Lebeauf
-Restauruants/Food
-Poor dates
-cheddar biscuits from red lobster
-the necessity for tp and Febreze to avoid the biohazard that your date may leave in your apartment after announcing to a bar full of people she's gotta go
Good thread


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