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Posted on 5/6/16 at 9:06 pm to Walker_Abel
Yes but I don't remember them
Posted on 5/6/16 at 9:55 pm to alphaandomega
quote:
Sidetrack
quote:
Harry's

Posted on 5/6/16 at 11:44 pm to Walker_Abel
Anybody else ever wake up on a ship headed to Puerto Rico?
Posted on 5/7/16 at 2:09 am to Walker_Abel
Yeah I have some good stories
Posted on 5/7/16 at 2:14 am to Walker_Abel
quote:
good
Interesting, sure. Good, not really.
Posted on 5/7/16 at 9:32 am to TeLeFaWx
quote:
That story was pretty boring.
I probably should've OT'd it up a little bit. But I wanted to tell an honest one.

Posted on 5/7/16 at 1:55 pm to Walker_Abel
I could write a novel. It's amazing I'm still alive honestly
Posted on 5/7/16 at 2:06 pm to Walker_Abel
My worst is waking up with a broken leg on a friend's couch sophomore year. He lived on the second floor and so I had to have climbed up, fell down and landed on the neighbors 2inch wire fence for their little shitty dog. So I basically impaled myself and broke my leg in one smooth motion and apparently got back up and climbed up again, just to pass out on their couch.
Next morning, buddy woke me up all pissed off. Their bottom floor neighbors were like "wtf happened to my fence." I was still absolutely hammered, so of course I said "frick your fence." Buddy looked at me like wtf dude, come on. I looked him square in the face and said "frick you too." He said say "frick you" one more time Benny. I think I got the first letter out before he belted me in the face. So then I got to walk home with a broken leg (I thought I had just rolled my ankle or something) and two massive lacerations..one to my side from that fricking stupid fence and one from a very large fist to my face.
Got home, passed out and one of my roommates woke me up like 3 hours later. My leg right above the ankle was about the size of a watermelon, so he took me to the hospital where thankfully one of my buddy's was the nurse on duty at the ER. Got a shot in the butt for the pain, then did the oh so fun x-rays. Had to have a plate put in about a week later, broke it pretty badly.
Basically my most retarded moments all in one night. Not fun. Not exactly a "good drunk story" but we all laugh about it when it gets brought up now.
Next morning, buddy woke me up all pissed off. Their bottom floor neighbors were like "wtf happened to my fence." I was still absolutely hammered, so of course I said "frick your fence." Buddy looked at me like wtf dude, come on. I looked him square in the face and said "frick you too." He said say "frick you" one more time Benny. I think I got the first letter out before he belted me in the face. So then I got to walk home with a broken leg (I thought I had just rolled my ankle or something) and two massive lacerations..one to my side from that fricking stupid fence and one from a very large fist to my face.
Got home, passed out and one of my roommates woke me up like 3 hours later. My leg right above the ankle was about the size of a watermelon, so he took me to the hospital where thankfully one of my buddy's was the nurse on duty at the ER. Got a shot in the butt for the pain, then did the oh so fun x-rays. Had to have a plate put in about a week later, broke it pretty badly.
Basically my most retarded moments all in one night. Not fun. Not exactly a "good drunk story" but we all laugh about it when it gets brought up now.
Posted on 5/7/16 at 2:24 pm to bamabenny
My best story is a combo drunk/sexual conquest story. Meet the Manager the "haute couture" department of The Barney's of NY store in Chicago at a bar down the street. I got her drunk as a skunk and got her to tell me what her one unfulfilled sexual fantasy was....getting banged in the dressing room of her department. Walked her home later that, was the perfect gentleman and set a date for lunch the following day. Had a great lunch where she proceeded to tell me it was time to make her fantasy come true....truly a great day!
Edit: this was all over a decade ago immediate post divorce and resigning my commission from the military....and definitely way prior to meeting Mrs ABears
Edit: this was all over a decade ago immediate post divorce and resigning my commission from the military....and definitely way prior to meeting Mrs ABears
This post was edited on 5/7/16 at 2:38 pm
Posted on 5/7/16 at 3:06 pm to jangalang
Got so drunk trying to drive home I was hallucinating and swerved to miss a grain bin that looked like it was in the middle of the road, ran into a deep ditch, water was coming into the drivers side window. Called my friend and woke him up (don't remember the conversation he told me about it later) but apparently I was asking him to come pull me out. Then he said I started screaming "you can't stop a fricking Chevrolet" and he heard my engine redlining and said I got all jacked up cause the truck drove out and hung up the phone.
I got drunk at the strip club once and this fat ugly black chick gets on stage and we started throwing pennies on stage and the bouncers went to kick us out and discovered we had snuck in a bottle of whiskey and were mixing drinks under the table. They tried to hold us waiting on the cops and I punched one in the throat and pushed the other one over a table and ran, jumped in the truck and hailed arse.
Then there was a time we ran from the cops and got on a gravel road...lost the cops then my buddy lost control and drove off into a lake sunk his truck.
I got so drunk at the bars in Starkville one weekend I couldn't find my way off campus just kept driving in circles. Finally got off campus, couldn't find the house we were staying at so I parked in someone's yard, woke up at 7 am all my doors open with 3 of my friends and 4 girls all passed out asleep in my truck
Was at Mardi gras for a bachelor party and we had done 1500 dollars worth of coke that day, tried to hit on a girl and her boyfriend tried to fight me. Punched him in the face, then hit his friend, then tackled the bouncer on my way out and a cop walks in the door and I punch him in the throat while at a dead sprint and hit bourbon st and get lost in the crowd
I got drunk at the strip club once and this fat ugly black chick gets on stage and we started throwing pennies on stage and the bouncers went to kick us out and discovered we had snuck in a bottle of whiskey and were mixing drinks under the table. They tried to hold us waiting on the cops and I punched one in the throat and pushed the other one over a table and ran, jumped in the truck and hailed arse.
Then there was a time we ran from the cops and got on a gravel road...lost the cops then my buddy lost control and drove off into a lake sunk his truck.
I got so drunk at the bars in Starkville one weekend I couldn't find my way off campus just kept driving in circles. Finally got off campus, couldn't find the house we were staying at so I parked in someone's yard, woke up at 7 am all my doors open with 3 of my friends and 4 girls all passed out asleep in my truck
Was at Mardi gras for a bachelor party and we had done 1500 dollars worth of coke that day, tried to hit on a girl and her boyfriend tried to fight me. Punched him in the face, then hit his friend, then tackled the bouncer on my way out and a cop walks in the door and I punch him in the throat while at a dead sprint and hit bourbon st and get lost in the crowd
Posted on 5/7/16 at 3:14 pm to Vols&Shaft83
quote:
Anybody else ever wake up on a ship headed to Puerto Rico?
Woke up in New Orleans once 5 hours away from where I started that night. No clue how I got there.
One night started in oxford, ms then went to Beale in Memphis, then blacked out and came to sitting at a blackjack table the next morning at 10 o clock in tunica with 2k worth of chips in front of me.
Posted on 5/7/16 at 3:48 pm to deltaland
So much bullshite in this thread.
Posted on 5/7/16 at 7:07 pm to JacketFan77
I wish mine was bullshite. I really do.
Posted on 5/7/16 at 8:55 pm to Walker_Abel
Do I have a few drunk stories? Probably a couple hundred but I don't have enough battery to list them all
Posted on 5/7/16 at 11:00 pm to Walker_Abel
The summer following my college graduation was filled with a ton of drunken stupidity. One weekend, I fished an alligator gar tournament with a couple of friends. The best time to fish for them is at night, so we loaded the boat with Miller Lite and headed out a few hours before the sun went down to our spot under a bridge, and set out our lines. About an hour after sunset, we were all pretty lit, but completely out of Copenhagen. The douchebags didn't want to pull anchor and drive me to shore about a couple hundred yards away, so I told them frick it, I'll swim to shore and go get some cans of dip. Placed my shoes and money in a gallon ziploc, tied it to my beltloop and swam for it. Once I hit shore, I put my shoes on and jogged a mile down the road to the store, which unfortunately had just closed for the night before I arrived. Decided that I already came this far and the next store was two miles away, so I took off. I made it ok and got my snuff, but by that time, the mix of running and drunkenness had me pouring sweat and breathing hard. I walked most of the way back, hit the water, and was about thirty feet from the boat when a big gar rolled between me and the boat. By this point I was too tired to be scared, but my fishing buddies were freaking out. Got in the boat, reloaded on Miller Lites and proceeded to not catch a got damn thing all night. 

Posted on 5/7/16 at 11:01 pm to Walker_Abel
dp
This post was edited on 5/7/16 at 11:03 pm
Posted on 5/8/16 at 12:42 am to Walker_Abel
was at a night club, one too many 100% proof vodka screwdrivers, pulled out 300 dollars and handed it to a dude and told him to let me have sex with his girlfriend who he was with.
next morning woke up in motel 6 parking lot, don't know how i got there. i decided then maybe drinking isn't my thing.
next morning woke up in motel 6 parking lot, don't know how i got there. i decided then maybe drinking isn't my thing.
Posted on 5/8/16 at 2:14 pm to deltaland
quote:
I could write a novel. It's amazing I'm still alive honestly
I feel ya
Posted on 5/10/16 at 3:51 pm to Walker_Abel
got drunk for the first time when i was 15 with my brother and his frat brothers at a NASCAR Race pregaming at Atlanta Motor Speedway and i motorboat some mom's titties at the other side of the camping grounds called Titty City. what a weekend that was
This post was edited on 5/10/16 at 3:53 pm
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