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Gumpy Haiku, Poem, Limerick and general Wordsmith Thread

Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:24 am
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:24 am
All Hail Tommy Rees
Trailers ablaze and dogs kicked
You hate to see it.




This post was edited on 1/3/24 at 9:57 am
Posted by TheTideMustRoll
Birmingham, AL
Member since Dec 2009
8906 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:27 am to
Milroe, what are you-
McLaughlin, why is the snap-
For frick's sake, you guys.
Posted by Debacle Grand Isle
Buffet line w Crystal
Member since Dec 2023
68 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:30 am to
Milroe the Dildoe
4th and three let’s dive two feet
BoB was right
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:33 am to
That last play was shite
From the Les Miles playbook
It made me giggle.

Posted by geauxnavybeatbama
Member since Jul 2013
25134 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:35 am to
Tommy Rees please pass!
Milroe is next years heisman!
Rees makes Epsteins list
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:37 am to
Milroe and dildo
Are inexorably linked
Thanks to Tommy Rees
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:40 am to
Call a damn roll out
Like every other team would
In the entire world

Posted by geauxnavybeatbama
Member since Jul 2013
25134 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:42 am to

In the heart of Pasadena, 'neath the California sun,
Alabama clashed with Michigan, a battle just begun.
The Rose Bowl, a theater of dreams and might,
Where two giants collided in the soft, golden light.

Crimson Tide, fierce and proud, a storied football tale,
But Michigan's Wolverines sought to set their sail.
On the field of roses, where legends are born,
A poetic battle, from dusk until dawn.

The whistle blew, and the clash did commence,
Alabama's offense, a formidable offense.
But Michigan's defense stood tall and strong,
A wall of resistance, where hopes did throng.

Through the air and on the ground, Alabama fought,
Yet Michigan's defense, their dreams it sought.
In the shadow of the mountains, beneath the azure sky,
A Wolverine roar echoed, reaching heights so high.

The clock ticked away, each moment a test,
In the Rose Bowl arena, where champions invest.
Michigan's spirit, resilient and true,
Found cracks in the armor of the Crimson and the Blue.

And when the final whistle sang its song,
A victor emerged, triumphant and strong.
Michigan's maize and blue waved in the breeze,
A Rose Bowl triumph, echoing through the trees.

Alabama, valiant in defeat, with heads held high,
For in the Rose Bowl's embrace, the brave never die.
A chapter concluded, but the tale marches on,
In the grand symphony of football, where heroes are drawn.
Posted by Violent Hip Swivel
Member since Aug 2023
2657 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:50 am to
Poor Jalen Milroe
Tries to dive into end zone
From the 5 yard line
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:52 am to


There once was a coach named Rees
Who in the big moments would freeze
He was planted by Kelly
To make the Gumps jelly
And turn them into championship absentees.

Posted by Dingbag
Member since Dec 2023
545 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 9:57 am to
From a Gump’s point of view:

Lost the only thing
That made our lives suck less, so
We banged our sisters
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:01 am to
Gump Apocalypse
Reality setting in
Dynasty long gone
Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 10:50 am to
Nick retirement
Nap time for sad Tiny Nick
Early bird special
Posted by Wulfgar
Member since Jan 2013
1214 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 11:29 am to
Did you just see what Jim Harbaugh did?
In Overtime, Bama did lose their bid.
Seth couldn’t snap and the defense was crap.
But unlike Kelly, Saban didn’t kill a kid.


Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 12:01 pm to
Whatever helps heal
Michigan greasing your arse
And making you cry.

Posted by Wulfgar
Member since Jan 2013
1214 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 12:09 pm to
Mettenberger limped
Daniels opted like a bitch
Dallas owned his arse

Posted by Lsupimp
Ersatz Amerika-97.6% phony & fake
Member since Nov 2003
78924 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 1:26 pm to
We heard Harbaugh say
Who has it as good as us
The process is dead
Posted by BlindedMeWithScience
Member since Jun 2023
2302 posts
Posted on 1/3/24 at 1:32 pm to
Bama had the lead
Feels like 2017
Oh shite they got beat
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