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re: Potential FIL
Posted on 6/30/16 at 12:52 pm to TbirdSpur2010
Posted on 6/30/16 at 12:52 pm to TbirdSpur2010
quote:
You're goddamned right I'm intolerant of someone's opinion that anyone shouldn't be together based upon their melanin levels.
You just defined yourself as a bigot. And what if the OP thinks he's too good to be with a black woman, or he's not attracted to them? It'd be ok?
3
Posted on 6/30/16 at 12:56 pm to TbirdSpur2010
I'm alive!
Lol sorry for the absence guys I'm alive. Pretty much I am still waiting for his schedule to free up for us to go eat. He has to be halfway ok with it because we just got back from a 7 night cruise in the carribean with my family. Either way I believe the initial shock is wearing off. He's become more inquisitive about who I am along with her grandma.
They apparently "knew all along" but never said anything because of denial I assume. Either way I'm just ready to go meet him. Her mom wants it to be a family affair and a big dinner though so we will see how it goes.
When we went on vacation he only texted one snarky remark too. He asked if I would sell her to the sex trade for money. I laughed at that one lol. Either way thanks for the advice guys and I'll update when the big night comes.
Lol sorry for the absence guys I'm alive. Pretty much I am still waiting for his schedule to free up for us to go eat. He has to be halfway ok with it because we just got back from a 7 night cruise in the carribean with my family. Either way I believe the initial shock is wearing off. He's become more inquisitive about who I am along with her grandma.
They apparently "knew all along" but never said anything because of denial I assume. Either way I'm just ready to go meet him. Her mom wants it to be a family affair and a big dinner though so we will see how it goes.
When we went on vacation he only texted one snarky remark too. He asked if I would sell her to the sex trade for money. I laughed at that one lol. Either way thanks for the advice guys and I'll update when the big night comes.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 12:58 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
quote:
Either way I believe the initial shock is wearing off.
Its amazing what a little patience can bring.
Sounds like you are on the path, good luck!
Posted on 6/30/16 at 12:59 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
You expect him to respect that you love his daughter, but you don't respect that he doesn't want you with his daughter that he has known all her life? If you truly loved her and this is giving her anxiety, you should let her go. Just my 2 cents and probably not what you want to hear.
Speaking as a father of two daughters and one son, I'd NEVER jeopardize seeing my children again for ANY reason. As a matter of fact, if my children took a stand and held his/her ground, I'd think I would have raised them right. I may not like the decision, but I respect my children. If they're in love, they should dig their heels in regardless of anxiety. I have some news, life is full of things that cause anxiety - learn to deal with it, especially with the one you love.
My guess is, FIL will come around. It may take him some time as he's working from a place of ignorance. Just my 2 cents.
To the OP - keep on keeping on. I wish nothing but the best for you and your fiáncé.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:16 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
quote:Nice. A lot of it is just ignorance because they go off of what they hear from others and what they see on Fox News. Personal experience is the best way to judge any individual.
I'm alive!
Lol sorry for the absence guys I'm alive. Pretty much I am still waiting for his schedule to free up for us to go eat. He has to be halfway ok with it because we just got back from a 7 night cruise in the carribean with my family. Either way I believe the initial shock is wearing off. He's become more inquisitive about who I am along with her grandma.
They apparently "knew all along" but never said anything because of denial I assume. Either way I'm just ready to go meet him. Her mom wants it to be a family affair and a big dinner though so we will see how it goes.
When we went on vacation he only texted one snarky remark too. He asked if I would sell her to the sex trade for money. I laughed at that one lol. Either way thanks for the advice guys and I'll update when the big night comes.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:16 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
You just defined yourself as a bigot. And what if the OP thinks he's too good to be with a black woman, or he's not attracted to them? It'd be ok?
Dude, just stop. Your stated an absolutely ridiculous opinion, and youre just heaping on the BS pile with in these straw-man arguments.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:20 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
And what if the OP thinks he's too good to be with a black woman, or he's not attracted to them? It'd be ok?
people are attracted to who they are attracted to and as long as it's another consenting adult who gives a pooh.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:25 pm to CrimsonTideMD
quote:
Your stated an absolutely ridiculous opinion
Just because you don't agree doesn't make it ridiculous.
quote:
youre just heaping on the BS pile with in these straw-man arguments
I'm just creating discussion. People are quick to scream racist one way but overlook the other side.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:27 pm to piggilicious
quote:
people are attracted to who they are attracted to and as long as it's another consenting adult who gives a pooh.
Parents, that's who.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:31 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
You just defined yourself as a bigot.
By stating that I don't tolerate the ridiculous stance that it's ok to oppose a marriage based upon skin color. Amazing that you're trying to spin that as a negative
quote:
what if the OP thinks he's too good to be with a black woman, or he's not attracted to them? It'd be ok?
He would be egregiously wrong. That's not what he's discussing or has implied at all, though.
Nice little strawman you got there.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:32 pm to dwgsfrlife7673
Sounds awesome man
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:36 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
Just because you don't agree doesn't make it ridiculous.
That's not why it's ridiculous.
quote:
I'm just creating discussion. People are quick to scream racist one way but overlook the other side.
You're being wilfully obtuse and purposefully apologetic of an indefensible stance. When the "other side" warrants discussion, I'm more than happy to call it out, too. That's not what was being discussed here, however.
Nice little deflection you've got going on
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:38 pm to Stacked
quote:
You can't know that, hahahaha. God you're young. I change my mind. Get married. Have fun explaining to your 27 year-old self what the frick you were thinking. This will work out perfect. The apprehension from her family will only add character to the relationship.
You need to stop providing advice to people. He shouldn't cater to someone's racist ways. If he loves this girl and she loves him, then what her father thinks is irrelevant. Plenty of people are married at 22 and live wonderful lives. You quite literally don't know anything about this poster other than what you've read on the internet.
This post was edited on 6/30/16 at 1:40 pm
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:39 pm to TbirdSpur2010
quote:That has been the move of racists and luke-warm racist for a while now. Call them out on their bigotry and they will turn it around on you as being the racist. It is quite fascinating actually
By stating that I don't tolerate the ridiculous stance that it's ok to oppose a marriage based upon skin color. Amazing that you're trying to spin that as a negative
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:41 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
There's more to it than that. But you just keep on believing that it's all her father. And you calling her father an a-hole when you don't even know the guy is pretty bigoted yourself. Pot meet kettle
what an insanely dumb post. Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:44 pm to MontyFranklyn
quote:
That has been the move of racists and luke-warm racist for a while now. Call them out on their bigotry and they will turn it around on you as being the racist. It is quite fascinating actually
If mental gymnastics were a sport, that guy would be competing in Rio this summer
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:45 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
But I do know that if she was 100% all in, she wouldn't be having anxiety about it
quote:
She's the one that kept it from her father for so long. Why is that? It's based on what the girl feels herself.
quote:
If I truly love someone, I'd want what is going to make her happy whether that means being with me or not.
quote:
ridiculous adjective ri·dic·u·lous \r?-'di-ky?-l?s\ causing or deserving ridicule; causing or worthy of mockery or derision; absurd; preposterous; laughable
In summary, your 2 assumptions and 1 trite platitude are indeed ridiculous. Not because I disagree with you-which I do--but because I understand the meaning of the word. I am mocking the ignorance of your message.
This post was edited on 6/30/16 at 1:48 pm
Posted on 6/30/16 at 1:57 pm to TbirdSpur2010
quote:
By stating that I don't tolerate the ridiculous stance that it's ok to oppose a marriage based upon skin color
You don't agree with anyone's opinion that is not your own. That is the very definition of bigotry. In fact, you think anyone's opinion that doesn't mirror yours is ridiculous.
quote:
He would be egregiously wrong
Yet, here you are white knighting for the OP when you have zero idea of his own character.
Posted on 6/30/16 at 2:08 pm to jvilletiger25
This thread has gotten out of hand. 
Posted on 6/30/16 at 2:15 pm to jvilletiger25
jvilletiger25's idea of bigot: one who insists 2+2=4 and contests those who say otherwise.
Youre ignoring the prejudicial and intolerant and hateful aspects of true "bigotry."
Swing and a miss again. We can read what he has written. We can observe that he's seeking advice on a difficult situation. Those things speak to his character. They're not the end-all be-all, but theyre an introduction and a glimpse of his character.
Youre ignoring the prejudicial and intolerant and hateful aspects of true "bigotry."
quote:
when you have zero idea of his own character.
Swing and a miss again. We can read what he has written. We can observe that he's seeking advice on a difficult situation. Those things speak to his character. They're not the end-all be-all, but theyre an introduction and a glimpse of his character.
This post was edited on 6/30/16 at 2:16 pm
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