I hope all of you lose gut wrenching ncaa tourney games

Lsu- up by 1 as time expires except the scoreboard shows you lost by 1, referees can’t review, black helicopter escorts scoretable folks out.

As a 2nd choice i hope you’re down 44-16 at any point of any game.

UK- i hope you get a technical foul for having the fattest arse fans on the planet ( and i’m from bama) and that T comes with lifetime bans from waffle house and mickey d’s and from the best italian restaurant in lexington- domino’s

Auburn- the committee f’d you guys good so not much more to ask for except to hope they put that shitty yella wood in bruce’s coaching box so everytime he gets out of that chair he trips and falls on his sweaty arse, creating the exact same effect as stomping on a giant sponge. Except the whole arena will smell 1000 times worse while pearl flops around like a carp.

Tennessee- i hope your whole team fouls out and that stupid smug grin your coach has turns to horror as you have to use vanderbilt’s players to avoid the forfeit.

Florida- i hope they sub in a directional school from some mullett- headed hellhole in the panhandle that doesn’t have a beach and they kick your arse, and all the divorced dads and ex cons take a victory lap while spooging wide angle over the 10 people from your school at the game as there was a 10% chance of rain.

State- wtf are you doing in the tourney??? You suck, you know you suck, you have the same chance of winning 2 games in the tourney as you would in the nba playoffs. I hope you ring those cowbells and some cow wanders in the arena, takes a huge dump at center court and the team loses the first slip and slide event in the history of the tourney.

Ole Miss- really??? Really???? What are the chances the black kids on the team all ask for asylum at the half to get the frick out of oxford. I hope you tailgate in your tacky tents with chandeliers and the kroger chicken fingers and week old potato salad get caught in the lights and the tents are scrapped forcing you to use those other white sheets y’all seem to have with you most of the time. I also hope some dumpy arse one legged male stripper named todd does the halftime show so that imbecilic greeting of hotty toddy will finally have meaning.

Bring leornard hamilton to tuscaloosa now!
We can’t get in a friggin 68 team tourney???
68 teams
68
Auuggggghhhhh!!!