Share a funny govt/military story

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You're a bad storyteller

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Better than you, you didn't even tell a story ya fagget.

Trump repeatedly saying the generals dont know how to make money is humorous

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"Use it or lose" is not an administrative policy. It's a type of cancer bureaucracies catch.

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When I was in the Army National Guard (the supply section) the first Commandment of Government Service was drilled into our heads. "Thou shalt spend every penny they allot to you." Otherwise they only give you half as much money next year.

Now our Supply Sergeant (Sgt. Gutierrez) was a genius when it came to winging deals with other units. A skill he practiced with religious zeal since it meant at the end of the year he could blow money on things like the company dinner. He was even, at one point, plotting to get a hot tub installed at the armory until the First Sergeant forbade it.

I have little doubt there are hundreds, if not thousands, of Sgt Gutierrezes scattered throughout the military cheerfully gaming the system for all its worth.

At the other end of the spectrum you have my ex-girlfriend who works for the Forestry Service in Wyoming. The Forestry Service, I am sorry to say, is not held in particularly high regard by the locals due to them controlling who gets access to what land and the water resources on that land.

A few years back they decided to stop allowing the locals to graze their cattle in an area that had been used for decades. One of the ranchers, as it turned out, happened to be the mayor of the little town they were headquartered in. And his revenge was swift and stinky.

He "accidentally" had the water to their office shut off and then stonewalled the agency for months to keep it from getting turned back on. Not only was the Forestry Service forced to rent Porta-potties for their office but, since you cannot work with the public if you don't have a working bathroom, they would have to drive across town and meet private citizens at the local town hall.

After about 4 months of this they reviewed the new policy and decided that by golly people could graze their cattle on that piece of land after all. And they got their water back the very next day.

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I was at that unit for the next 3 years after that incident. All that toilet paper was stacked in pallets in a corner in the back of the aircraft hangar. I went to a support unit after that unit and went back there for tdy about 6 years after all this went down and they still had a pallet and a half left.

The best part of all of this is that fricker tried blaming me.

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Then what happened?

That EM3 had to clean all of the bathrooms on base by himself every Tuesday and Friday for 4 months.

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Use it or lose" is not an administrative policy. It's a type of cancer bureaucracies catch

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Yeah spending all the money on worthless crap just to show you spent it is the most asanine policy ever to rear its ugly head. In addition to govnt waste THROUGHOUT the year, they waste it one more time in September, and boy do they go big.

Here's a better idea. Put back in the treasury what you didn't spend and reward said department with a free lunch at the end of the fiscal year for operating UNDER budget. Taxpayer money is not to be played with.

This policy makes me mad.

A kinda? funny military story for me was a time that I went to a friends house in Yuba City, CA on a weekend from Camp Pendleton.

This has been years now, 10 actually. Anyways, my friend was from Yuba City, up north, towards Sacramento. Him, my other friend and myself were going up there for the weekend. This happened a bit before I was Married - Jan 20th 2008 (Got married in May).This will come into play in a min .

Anyways, iirc it was about a 10 hour drive up there. It was definitly out of bounds from the 300 mile radius that we were supposed to stay in. We were Nco's and were well respected. We make the drive up there, and before approaching, we were stopped at this 4 way with fields. I said to my friend, "I thought you said you lived in the hood?" He replies, were not there yet, but close. I am driving, and its us three in my 96 Prelude.

We pull up to the house and parked across the street on the side. Its quiet, and nothing really out of place. Next thing I know, there is this mob of kids chasing this one guy. This guy runs into this house - come to next hear my friend say, "What the frick, who is that?" It turned out to be his house. Remember, I said that we were across from it and he did not say which was his.

Next while seeing this crowd of kids, were standing in the front yard. All kinds of hispanic and AA kids that are coming from a party that supposedly a guy hit a girl. Well, the kid comes out of the house with a kitchen knife Proceeds to stab another and a kid standing next to me pulls out a gun. Thats when shite was going crazy! Shots fired, somehow we got into the house and everyone ran away. We called 911 to report the incident and cops showed up.

Well, next day, the front yard was pretty much the crime scene. So we decided to go to original plans and start drinking. We sat on the steps of his house watching the cops investigate. Cops ended up asking us who we were and my buddy like an idiot said that we were Marines. Well, they got our information and that was that.

Fast forward, get married in May. I come back from leave, my plane was delayed, so I was going to be late checking back in. Get back to pendleton from San Diego and go to change in the locker room. My buddy comes in and starts this hand shooting thing. I was like, "wtf are you doing?" He then next says, "Gunny knows about yall going to Yuba." Lmao. Ended up getting a page 11 for going out of bounds because Sutter County CA called us to testify. Got hooked up though with a free 10 days to go back up there and party on the governments per diem for TAD orders and money from the court.

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Yuba City, California ^inglecorjy^3^ax Teen dies in shooting at YC party High-schoolers in shock over slaying of popular youth By Nancy Pasternack Appeal-Democrat Marching to celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday Saturday did nothing to stop the flow of tears from teenagers who had known Alexander "Alex" Smith. Less than 12 hours after the 17-year-old Yuba City High School student died from a gunshot wound at Rideout Memorial Hospital, they clustered in the aisle and in a couple of pews at Bethel AME Church in Marysville, where the "Unity in the Community" celebration had just ended. Over and over, they expressed disbelief. They shared information and clutched their cell phones where dozens of text messages about Smith and the incident were stored. Police were called to the scene at Frederick Street and Hughes Avenue in Yuba City at 12:53 a.m. after a brawl involving more than 30 partygoers -young men, women, and teenagers from around the Mid-Valley Smith's shooting. Smith was taken to Rideout Memorial Hospital shortly after 1 a.m. with a gun- Alex Smith Yuba City High School student shot at party ended with shot wound to the back. He died at approximately 3 a.m. Another man, Gregory Wilson, 19, of Williams was shot in the buttocks during the melee and was taken to the UCD Medical Center in Sacramento. A female partygoer sustained a broken jaw in the fight. No arrests have been made. The party where the shooting occurred was attended by more than 100, many affiliated with the Norteno and Crips gangs. Representatives were present from at least one other gang, according to Yuba City police. "It was a pretty mixed crowd," said Sgt. Brian Bernardis. "They appear to Turn to SLAYING / A5 Nick Adams/Appeal-Democrat Cassandra Smith, 16, left, sister of Alex Smith, and Nicole Hedrick, right, a family friend, recall the 17-year-old, who was shot and later died on Saturday morning.

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Weird, dude. I live in Yuba City and drive to Camp Pendleton to vacation sometime.

Let me guess... you're one of those SJW phaggets? Get your Mizzou arse outta here.