re: OT: Anyone ever been through a divorce here?

Never been through one but have dealt with lots of people who have. To the extent you can work out everything or most things prior to filing certainly that makes the process and stress that goes with it more manageable.

Where custody of children is concerned we now have a law favoring joint custody LINK but at this point I don't think it has caused much of a change in the way judges decide cases. What is in the child's best interest is and always has been paramount and the judge has great discretion in making that determination. I think it accurate to say that the mother gets custody unless father has solid evidence that mother is bad. Historically it has always been that way. You generally see joint custody in cases where the parties agree to it.