You know what… I read this post 3 years ago talking about Dan Mullen & “how hot he is” or whatever. I bookmarked it so that I can have enough time to sit back & reflect on what was said. To be honest, I have spent countless days pondering this hot take & I can honestly sit here & say with a straight face, that that person was 100% right. He ages like fine wine, & I feel so bad for him that he was relieved of his duties at Florida. That hunk of a man never stood a chance, wasn’t given a fair shot. If he ever needed someone to comfort him, I would be the first one on his door step, ready & willing, to do whatever he needed. He is a wonderful man who is full of life. To be honest I wouldn’t even need to take any blue chew if I got one night alone with him! I wish I was able to gaze into his eyes each & every night before bed… :(

But now with the recent news, I can’t believe I’m about to say this but I’m more excited about this then when I got down on one knee to ask my baby to marry me. One name… Brian Kelly. My God, how the Lord has blessed me with another hunk of a man for me to obsess over. We never needed Lincoln Riley! Wisdom comes with age, & good life experience also. I bet you Brian Kelly has way more moves he can pull on me in bed than that bum of a man Lincoln Riley! Big throbbing meat sticks can only take you so far, you need to have the experience to get the job done! And I am confident that Brian Kelly will leave me satisfied with this new role on AND off the field. Thank God I have a Tempur Pedic mattress cause I’m telling you I would let Brian Kelly beat the bricks off of me, he probably has a meat stick the size of a mule’s that’s ready to plow me down. Dan Mullen will always come 1st, but man Brian Kelly already holds a special place in my life… & hopefully in my bed soon! Coach O was never really that hot in my book, that’s why he couldn’t get the job done without GOAT Burreaux. He was just a puppet having his strings pulled. Okay yeah sure I would’ve let him kiss me or whatever, but that’s it. He doesn’t get special access to my glory hole like Dan & Brian do.

All in all it was a rough season this past year, but you know what? I like it rough. Brian will be rough. & my goal for the next 10 years of his contract is to please him however I can, on behalf of all us Tiger fans. He is 60 years old, & will be 70 if he finishes his contract out, I get that… he will probably leave in a wheelchair because he’s so old, but I just hope he leaves in a wheelchair because of the magical night I dream of having with him. Brian Kelly not only embodies what it means to be a true LSU Tiger at heart, he is living & breathing proof that Greek Gods still roam Earth. I set up an altar to channel his loving spirit to reign over me, in hopes that one day he will rain all over me… Golden shower is fine but I’d prefer some thick white flurries during this holiday season. You know what I mean? No I’m not on drugs posting this, so don’t even go there. These are my true feelings I have deep in my heart & have finally built up the courage to share them with you guys. I consider you guys family. Please no hate, I will report you to the police for hate crime. This is my 1st & probably last post I will ever make on here… My time is coming to an end now, it was nice knowing all of you… I am finally goin to end it all now, no more burden in my heart for holding in my feelings. I am finally free!!!

Geaux Tigers!