Have this issues been brought up?

I was visiting some friends who are black. While chatting with their grandson and just shooting the shite. Out of the blue he asked me if I know what his uncle called me. Not really thinking I said I don’t. He said he calls you cracker arse cracker. Admittedly I was caught of guard and kindly said that he should not say that because the connotation is wrong. It just made realize that racism is prevalent in society. Now if I turned and around and said a racist word then I’d be no better than the other person. But it did strike me as strange.

Has the issue been brought up about blacks calling themselves the N word? It’s more prevalent for them to say it than white people. How should we address it when it happens.

If there are some black people on here who could explain the subtle nuances to the word and if there are various meanings I’d like to know.

I have friends that I can say the word around and I never directly call them that. They always call me that or even themselves.

I’d that something that is being addressed and I haven’t seen it ? Or just still a hush hush thing.

I’d really like to understand the difference in the term just because someone says it who isn’t black.

I hope this question is taken serious as that’s my exact intention. Just clarification. TIA.