re: Terrible jokes said among LSU/Bama fans lately

It takes a special kind of football fan to be a gump
To greet each breaking morning with "Roll Tide!"
To truly comprehend them we must peer inside their heads,
There's plenty room, so take a look inside.

In war the victor is the side that shoots more bullets,
It doesn't matter if they lose the battle though.
And their best farmer is the one who plants the most seeds
Inconsequential is if they all fail to grow

They win in basketball if their team is the tallest
Even if they miss on every single shot
The fastest car's the one that's got the biggest engine
Despite the fact it can't get out the parking lot.

To win debates there you need only scream the loudest
Even if gibberish is the only thing you say
They rate their movies on the number of explosions,
So best director in their minds is Michael Bay.

I hope this little ditty has been most enlightening,
I hope the Tide you may now better understand 
So when they say they really beat us in November
Just pat their heads, 'cause hey, they're just a Bama fan.