Application to become a Bama fan

Dear Bama fans,

I am applying to be a fan of Bama not because ya'll win, but because you wouldn't put up with getting raped nearly as bad as Auburn is right now. At least you put competitive teams on the field and that is something I can respect. Right now Auburn's team isn't playing, they are quitting, and allowing themselves to be raped.

Plus, I will put up with growing out my hair into a mullet just to be part of the team.

Thanks,

Junior Rose Green