re: GMT

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Worked on a spreader

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This kind of spreader?

Today in History: April 12

1204 The Fourth Crusade sacks Constantinople.

1606 England adopts the Union Jack as its flag.

1811 1st US colonists on Pacific coast arrive at Cape Disappointment, Washington

1872 Jesse James' gang robs a bank of $1,500 in Columbia, Kentucky, 1 dead

1861 Fort Sumter is shelled by the Confederacy, starting America's Civil War.

1864 Confederate Gen. Nathan Bedford Forrest captures Fort Pillow, in Tennessee.

1954 Bill Haley records "Rock Around the Clock."

1961 Russian cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin becomes the first person to orbit Earth (Vostok 1)

1990 1st meeting of East German democratically elected parliament, acknowledges responsibility for the Holocaust and asks for forgiveness

2021 Great Britain loosens its COVID-19 restrictions, opening pubs and shops after 175 days, the world's longest period of restrictions

2022 UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson apologies and is fined for attending parties during COVID-19 lockdown - first premier to be sanctioned for breaking the law

2023 New York City appoints it first-ever rat czar as Kathleen Corradi becomes the city's first-ever director of rat mitigation

Born on April 12

1777 Henry Clay, the "Great Compromiser", American politician and statesman who ran unsuccessfully for president three times.

1838 John Shaw Billings, American librarian, army physician.

1979 Claire Danes, American actress (Angela-My So Called Life, Romeo & Juliet), born in NYC, New York

JOTD
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just as it's going by. As he gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Impeccable timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was really something special."
Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right.”
Passenger: "Wow, what a guy!"
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger: "How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his wife."

Morning all

Morning All

Nice day here but the winds supposed to pick up.

Today in History: April 13

1598 The Edict of Nantes grants political rights to French Huguenots.

1860 1st Pony Express rider reaches Sacramento, California

1861 After 34 hours of bombardment, Union-held Fort Sumter surrenders to Confederates.

1902 J.C. Penny opens his first store in Kemmerer, Wyoming.

1919 British forces kill hundreds of Indian nationalists in the Amritsar Massacre.

1943 Franklin D. Roosevelt dedicates the Jefferson Memorial.

1960 The first navigational satellite is launched into Earth's orbit.

1970 An oxygen tank explodes on Apollo 13, preventing a planned moon landing and jeopardizing the lives of the three-man crew.

1976 The U.S. Federal Reserve begins issuing $2 bicentennial notes.

1979 The world's longest doubles ping-pong match ends after 101 hours.

1997Tiger Woods first person of color to win Masters

2009 US record producer Phil Spector is found guilty of second-degree murder of actress Lana Clarkson in 2003

2020 NY Governor Andrew Cuomo says “I believe the worst is over if we continue to be smart,” about the COVID-19 pandemic in New York as death toll passes 10,000

2021 US, South Africa and the EU authorities temporarily stop administrating Johnson & Johnson COVID-19 vaccines after six women developed blood clots

2023 American F.B.I. arrests 21-year-old member of Massachusetts Air National Guard for leaking classified documents, including national security secrets, on an online gaming chat group

Born on April 13

1743 Thomas Jefferson, third President of the United States (1801-09)

1852 Frank W. Woolworth, American retailer.

1866 Butch Cassidy [Robert LeRoy Parker], American outlaw and leader of the Wild Bunch.

JOTD
Why did I get divorced?

Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

Good morning

Good morning

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Morning all

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Morning Wildcat. How are things up in your neck of the woods? I know Kentucky has been hammered with bad weather recently.

Like, seriously, did your state desecrate the burial place of an ancient weather god?

He was masturbating!

He was mastur—bating!!


HE WAS MASTURBATING!!!