GMT

Today in History: March 4

1634 Samuel Cole opens the first tavern in Boston, Massachusetts.

1766 The British Parliament repeals the Stamp Act, the cause of bitter and violent opposition in the colonies

1789 The first Congress of the United States meets in New York and declares that the Constitution is in effect.

1791 Vermont is admitted as the 14th state. It is the first addition to the original 13 colonies.

1813 The Russians fighting against Napoleon reach Berlin. The French garrison evacuates the city without a fight.

1861 The Confederate States of America adopt the "Stars and Bars" flag.

1908 The New York board of education bans the act of whipping students in school.

1975 Queen Elizabeth II knights Charlie Chaplin.

1987 President Reagan takes full responsibility for the Iran-Contra affair in a national address.

1994 4 Arab terrorist founded guilty of bombing the World Trade Center

2020 Italian Prime Minister Giuseppe Conte announces all sport in Italy will be played behind closed doors for at least a month in an effort to contain COVID-19

2020 New study confirms human-caused climate change did make the 2020 Australian bushfire season worse, published by World Weather Attribution

Born on March 4

1888 Knute Rockne, football player and coach for Notre Dame.

1904 Ding Ling, Chinese writer and women's rights activist.


JOTD
A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday. She spends $15,000 and looks sensational. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”.

’About 32,’ is the reply.’
‘Nope! I’m exactly 50,’ the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald’s and asks the counter girl the very same question.
The girl replies, ‘I’d guess about 29.’ The woman replies with a big smile, ‘Nope, I’m 50.’
Now she’s feeling really good about herself. She stops at a candy shop on her way down the street.
She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the assistant the same burning question.
The clerk responds, ‘Oh, I’d say 30.’
Again she proudly responds, ‘I’m 50, but thank you!’
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replies, ‘Lady, I’m 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra Then, and only then I can tell you EXACTLY how old you are.’
They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the better of her. She finally blurts out, ‘What the hell, go ahead.’
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she says, ‘Okay, okay.....How old am I?’
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, ‘Madam, you are 50.’
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, ‘That was incredible, how could you tell?’
‘I was behind you at McDonalds’.