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re: Make the 4th Great Again.
Posted on 7/6/19 at 12:41 am to Whiznot
Posted on 7/6/19 at 12:41 am to Whiznot
There was this one feller standing at a podium . Mm hmmm
A fart was let and a teleprompter malfunctioned.
Trump said the water was deep. And the teleprompter said it was cold too
I believe one feller came from Arkansas
A fart was let and a teleprompter malfunctioned.
Trump said the water was deep. And the teleprompter said it was cold too
I believe one feller came from Arkansas
1
Posted on 7/6/19 at 5:12 pm to Jefferson Dawg
HOW I IMAGINE THIS HAPPENING: AN ESSAY
It's 10pm on a Friday night. And Whiznot sits on a couch in a darkened room. The air heavy and thick with a pungent odor, like a weird warm cheese.
As the lights from the TV flicker across his blank stare, Rachel Maddow's shrill voice yaps on about the 5-hour boner that Trump's teleprompter gaffe had given her.
And then. Ever so slowly. Whiznot's blank stare grows a little less blank. And the Heinz-Mayochup-encrusted corners of his mouth start to lift... higher and higher....as a smile, a terrifying serial-killer smile, twists and contorts onto his pale face....
"I've got it!!", he cries aloud. Startling his pet ferret that was in the corner hiding a terd with a Filet o' Fish wrapper it had gnawed into tiny shreds.
Rat a tat!, plink, plack!, chk! chk!, click......his fingers dance across the keyboard and in no time at all he's logged into SEC rant and on to the GSB. And it's as if the words were flowing effortlessly and directly from some other enlightened world in outerspace and through his fingers and magically on to the screen!!!.......
"He said that the teleprompter malfunctioned.
There was also a bad smell but Trump said that the teleprompter farted."
....Poetry, he thought to himself as he clicked 'submit'. Sheer poetry.
And that night he slept the best sleep he'd had in years. The dreams were vivid and bright and in one he was invited to Gettysburg in the year 1864 and was asked to read his post to a large gathering on a hillside and his favorite teacher from 7th grade was there, Misses Grozenowski, who he still masterbates to, and she had tears of pride streaming down here cheeks as he read..... and the applause from the crowd went on and on and on and felt like it would never end until suddenly he was awakened by the pet ferret crawling on his face. But, he didn;t swat it away like normal. He let Mr. FluffyTail finish gnawing the Mayochup crust out his mouth corners this time, trying not to giggle because it kind of tickled. Then cradled him gently in his arms. Said a quick prayer of thanks to Grimtock. And drifted back to sleep.
It's 10pm on a Friday night. And Whiznot sits on a couch in a darkened room. The air heavy and thick with a pungent odor, like a weird warm cheese.
As the lights from the TV flicker across his blank stare, Rachel Maddow's shrill voice yaps on about the 5-hour boner that Trump's teleprompter gaffe had given her.
And then. Ever so slowly. Whiznot's blank stare grows a little less blank. And the Heinz-Mayochup-encrusted corners of his mouth start to lift... higher and higher....as a smile, a terrifying serial-killer smile, twists and contorts onto his pale face....
"I've got it!!", he cries aloud. Startling his pet ferret that was in the corner hiding a terd with a Filet o' Fish wrapper it had gnawed into tiny shreds.
Rat a tat!, plink, plack!, chk! chk!, click......his fingers dance across the keyboard and in no time at all he's logged into SEC rant and on to the GSB. And it's as if the words were flowing effortlessly and directly from some other enlightened world in outerspace and through his fingers and magically on to the screen!!!.......
"He said that the teleprompter malfunctioned.
There was also a bad smell but Trump said that the teleprompter farted."
....Poetry, he thought to himself as he clicked 'submit'. Sheer poetry.
And that night he slept the best sleep he'd had in years. The dreams were vivid and bright and in one he was invited to Gettysburg in the year 1864 and was asked to read his post to a large gathering on a hillside and his favorite teacher from 7th grade was there, Misses Grozenowski, who he still masterbates to, and she had tears of pride streaming down here cheeks as he read..... and the applause from the crowd went on and on and on and felt like it would never end until suddenly he was awakened by the pet ferret crawling on his face. But, he didn;t swat it away like normal. He let Mr. FluffyTail finish gnawing the Mayochup crust out his mouth corners this time, trying not to giggle because it kind of tickled. Then cradled him gently in his arms. Said a quick prayer of thanks to Grimtock. And drifted back to sleep.
This post was edited on 7/6/19 at 5:13 pm
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