re: Supplies needed for next week's game against Alabama:

I used to make cocaine cocktails every year.

High Tower Martini glass
Layer Kahlua
Bailey's Irish Cream
Bacardi 151 on top

Light it up and suck it down through a straw before the fire melts the plastic

But I went out after the 2009 Iron Bowl, and ended up almost getting arrested. I was so drunk I could barely walk, so I stopped to sit on a bench downtown.

I woke up with a cop shining a flashlight in my face. He was cool about it. He searched me and then gave me a ride home.

I still think I got lucky it was the day after Thanksgiving, or he might have taken me to the drunk tank.

I decided I would stick to mixed drinks after that night.