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re: How do you deal with a insecure/jealous person in a relationship?
Posted on 3/30/14 at 6:33 pm to MsGarrison
Posted on 3/30/14 at 6:33 pm to MsGarrison
Sounds like you can only get laid by deadbeats.
1
Posted on 3/30/14 at 9:50 pm to MsGarrison
Easy: Break up with her/him
Posted on 3/31/14 at 10:55 am to MsGarrison
I'd like to say that there are more options than just "getting out". You may have an opportunity to change her life for the better.
An intimate relationship is more than just "what's in it for me?" It is give and take, not just take. So many relationships end these days because at least one of the two persons go into it always asking what the other person can do for them, not what they can do for them. Once their negative features or characteristics outweigh the positives, they leave. Anyone who thinks that way will be destined to be in and out of relationships over the rest of their lives until they learn patience, tolerance, and humility.
With that said, you can leave, or you can try to help her. She might actually be bipolar. It's pretty common and it is treatable. With the right medication, she could be completely normal and a majority of the roadblocks in your relationships could be removed right away. If she's not bipolar, she might benefit from some therapy to address abandonment issues and her insecurities that she is projecting on to you. Perhaps a combination of individual as well as couples' therapy could help you two.
Finally, you could simply ask her what you could do to help her trust issues and come up with a plan to deal with them. That might mean you losing a lot of your freedom to do whatever you want for a while as her trust is built, but that might not be much different than your current situation if you have to "pay the price" for you doing what you'd like.
I don't know if you're dating, cohabiting (long-term, not married), or married, but you'll first have to look to yourself and what you want out of your relationship; you won't be successful if either of you is only taking and not giving. Then, plot a course that you believe is best for both of you. Just remember that it takes two people to make it work, and I hope you aren't the only one working at it. She'll have to see that, as well.
An intimate relationship is more than just "what's in it for me?" It is give and take, not just take. So many relationships end these days because at least one of the two persons go into it always asking what the other person can do for them, not what they can do for them. Once their negative features or characteristics outweigh the positives, they leave. Anyone who thinks that way will be destined to be in and out of relationships over the rest of their lives until they learn patience, tolerance, and humility.
With that said, you can leave, or you can try to help her. She might actually be bipolar. It's pretty common and it is treatable. With the right medication, she could be completely normal and a majority of the roadblocks in your relationships could be removed right away. If she's not bipolar, she might benefit from some therapy to address abandonment issues and her insecurities that she is projecting on to you. Perhaps a combination of individual as well as couples' therapy could help you two.
Finally, you could simply ask her what you could do to help her trust issues and come up with a plan to deal with them. That might mean you losing a lot of your freedom to do whatever you want for a while as her trust is built, but that might not be much different than your current situation if you have to "pay the price" for you doing what you'd like.
I don't know if you're dating, cohabiting (long-term, not married), or married, but you'll first have to look to yourself and what you want out of your relationship; you won't be successful if either of you is only taking and not giving. Then, plot a course that you believe is best for both of you. Just remember that it takes two people to make it work, and I hope you aren't the only one working at it. She'll have to see that, as well.
Posted on 3/31/14 at 3:35 pm to MsGarrison
Leave. Jealousy is a poison. A little bit of it is natural for everyone but there is a limit to where it will destroy your relationship from within.
Posted on 3/31/14 at 3:36 pm to MsGarrison
quote:
Jealousy, envious.. I cannot do anything without being questioned or constantly bothered.
HELP!
sounds like my issues on the SECr
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