re: My son came to my room while I was asleep, lifted up the sheets and saw my butt this morni

Stay focused on the boys and just be the best dad you can while they are with you, and communicate with them as much as you can when they are not.

Follow others advice on getting a lawyer involved. When you have the kids don't speak ill of your ex. Don't even let her become a topic of discussion if at all possible. Your relationship is with the kids and not the ex.

That is a normal occurrence in the life of any kid at some point or another. I wouldn't stress too much over her ramblings, but I again would involve a lawyer and start wearing a go pro for the entire visitation period (just kidding).