re: Why do Arkansas fans feel

The first step in correcting your problem is admitting you have one. It's painfully obvious to all readers that you have a burning desire to dump LSU and climb aboard the flagship. We understand. All who know, yearn to be a part of the greatness that is the Arkansas Razorbacks.

The best first step for you would be to create a funeral pyre for all of that queer purple and yellow garb you wear. It will be like a weight being lifted off your shoulders. Find a sporting goods store, and start off slowly, maybe just a cardinal hat with a white Razorback on the front. When you've accomplished this, come back and let us know how much better this makes you feel. We will then impart further instructions, and possibly coordinates to the flagship.