OT: Anyone ever been through a divorce here?

Its not just Arkansas, its everywhere. Family law makes divorce into "cash and prizes" for the woman.

There's no stigma to being a divorced woman or a single mom, so women really have no incentive to stay. I'm cynical for various reasons, lets just say.

No fault divorce means she can be fricking every guy on your street, file for divorce, and she's still coming out on top.

What I was afraid of.

I stand to lose a bit and I'd also like to have my little girl. She hasn't had an actual job in 4 years.

I've thought of selling everything and then buying things back later....but that may be dumb too.

I'm thoroughly convinced that the average woman doesn't love men in the way most men think. I don't know that they know how.

Based on my experience:

1. Women love children (most of the time).

2. Women love "to be loved".

Marriage and monogamy for women is about extracting resources. I don't blame them, necessarily, I think it is biology. Women are geared to seek the alpha, and that is about their need to be provided for.

Men, likewise, have an animal instinct, and that is to avoid monogamy and bang everything that walks.

The problem is that no-fault divorce, birth control, and lack of stigma of being divorced provide very little incentive for women to make good wives. The stigma remains for men who don't "do their duty", i.e. get married in the first place, "grow up", provide, etc.

Women often get divorced out of "boredom" in a marriage.

I'm veering misogynistic a bit here, but I don't mean to. I just believe that there are biological forces at work, and marriage used to stifle the base instincts of both genders. No fault divorce and to a lesser extent, the provision of govt assistance, and the family law system that screws men over most of the time, makes it possible for women to extract resources they need for survival without providing anything to men in return. Its a helluva set up.

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edit: Talk to a lawyer before you ever mention the idea to your wife, lawyer can help guide you to the best path. Most people frick up by rushing to get shite filed, once its filed, hands become tied. All I can say is start the preparations with the guidance of a good family atty.

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I've got 2 lawyers I consult with on a weekly basis

Genius

Those two attorneys should be able to help you, both right now and then help you find a good attorney. You'll want her to be one of the better divorce attorneys in NWA.

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The stigma remains for men who don't "do their duty", i.e. get married in the first place, "grow up", provide, etc

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I think that stigma is pretty well gone or nowhere near what it used to be with this younger generation.

I know so many people my age that have no desire to get married or even have kids. Both men and women.

Hell I still talk to and bang an ex from years ago that is like that, doesn't want to get married or have kids. She has the perfect view on it, too.

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I've thought of selling everything and then buying things back later....but that may be dumb too.

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It doesn't work like that anymore, in divorces, lawsuits, bankruptcy, etc. a judge can look at your financial transactions to see if you have attempted to hide assets.

If you have say a boat, classic car, etc. you can't do the buddy deal and sell it to him for $1 then "buy" it back when it is all done, you have to sale it at "fair market value" show proof (money hitting bank accounts, etc) a set amount of time before the legal procedure begins.

Also Arkansas does not have a limit on child support/alimony, it is based on your income at that time and can be protested for adjustment(to pay more) by the woman, but you will not have the option to protest to pay less in the future if your income decreases. (This is what caused Beck to get into trouble, his Child Support was based off the NBA checks he received for a little while, won't be surprised to see McFadden in similar trouble once his career ends.)

She has gone pretty crazy over the last two years. Yea, she said it.

I'm not sure what causes that in people. Is it money? Is it greed? Is it an inflated self worth?

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You'll want her to be one of the better divorce attorneys in NWA.

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If you really want to be a dick, get the phone book find all the divorce attorneys then go one by one and set up a consultation meeting with them in prospects of hiring them to handle this for you.

Once they consult with you, you tell them your side, they have to refuse her if she contacts them.

She will then have to find someone out of area to handle this which puts her having to travel to meet with them.

A buddy of mine had his ex-wife do this, he had to go four counties over to find a lawyer, the only one she didn't consult with local was the worst lawyer in the area (as far as his reputation goes) in these matters. Or he could just be a dumb arse and made up a story about this.