Started By
Message
So I served on jury duty last week
Posted on 3/21/16 at 1:18 am
Posted on 3/21/16 at 1:18 am
After being summoned ~10 times since I've lived here, I was finally selected. The DA said in his opening remarks, "If a crime is committed in Hell, there won't be angels for witnesses." And boy, was that true.
A meth-addict couple broke into the home of an elderly woman living alone, hoping to steal money and whatever they could find of value. For some reason I've not been able to figure out, they woke her up some time between 2 and 4 AM and proceeded to beat the absolute hell out of her. Cut her up with a knife. Swung a shotgun like a baseball bat on her head hard enough to break the shotgun in half and expose her skull. Covered (and I do mean covered) in blood they left her to die. How this woman survived is nothing short of a miracle.
We convicted the son of a bitch, but I'm haunted by the pictures of the victim. I can't let it go. I can't sleep, and I can be doing innocent things like eating lunch with the family at a restaurant or watching A&M baseball when I bust into pussy tears over this. This is eating me up. I drove out into the county today to find her home but didn't stop because I had others with me. But I feel compelled to go out there tomorrow to... I actually don't know. Hug her? Offer rides to wherever, I dunno. I do know I need to do something to get past this, but I don't want to freak out the victim. So there's a quandary. What sayeth OTB? I definitely don't want to make things worse for her, but at the same time I *think* this might do her as much good as it does me.
A meth-addict couple broke into the home of an elderly woman living alone, hoping to steal money and whatever they could find of value. For some reason I've not been able to figure out, they woke her up some time between 2 and 4 AM and proceeded to beat the absolute hell out of her. Cut her up with a knife. Swung a shotgun like a baseball bat on her head hard enough to break the shotgun in half and expose her skull. Covered (and I do mean covered) in blood they left her to die. How this woman survived is nothing short of a miracle.
We convicted the son of a bitch, but I'm haunted by the pictures of the victim. I can't let it go. I can't sleep, and I can be doing innocent things like eating lunch with the family at a restaurant or watching A&M baseball when I bust into pussy tears over this. This is eating me up. I drove out into the county today to find her home but didn't stop because I had others with me. But I feel compelled to go out there tomorrow to... I actually don't know. Hug her? Offer rides to wherever, I dunno. I do know I need to do something to get past this, but I don't want to freak out the victim. So there's a quandary. What sayeth OTB? I definitely don't want to make things worse for her, but at the same time I *think* this might do her as much good as it does me.
21
Posted on 3/21/16 at 2:34 am to finestfirst79
I wouldn't go talk to her but that's just me. Not sure how much good that would do for her. Talk to your wife or go to a professional. shite sounds terrible what happened. I can't imagine the pictures you had to see. Drink a couple beers and just try to relax man 
Posted on 3/21/16 at 2:39 am to finestfirst79
Physical recovery at that age is a long, long, hard road. If you feel led to do so, offer to try to help put right what the addicts have done.
ETA - Make the offer of help through her family or church or some other means. It might not be wise to show up on her front porch.
ETA - Make the offer of help through her family or church or some other means. It might not be wise to show up on her front porch.
This post was edited on 3/21/16 at 2:43 am
Posted on 3/21/16 at 5:13 am to finestfirst79
I am not a mental health professional, but I would call the DA or courthouse and see if they have a counselor for this.
also many clergy have counseling training.
If you are ex-military call the VA.
Talk to somebody.
also many clergy have counseling training.
If you are ex-military call the VA.
Talk to somebody.
This post was edited on 3/21/16 at 5:14 am
Posted on 3/21/16 at 7:50 am to finestfirst79
Maybe write her a letter? Old people love getting letters and it would give her time to process it on her own time without having you in front of her to digest it all.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 8:24 am to finestfirst79
I would call the DA and ask if they have counseling services for Jury members, I would imagine that exists at some level.
I would probably not contact the lady directly, but work thru some other means to offer her support. Not sure if that would have any bearing on the conviction of the savages that did that to her.
Sorry for what you are dealing with. I've been on a jury twice, but nothing like what you describe.
I would probably not contact the lady directly, but work thru some other means to offer her support. Not sure if that would have any bearing on the conviction of the savages that did that to her.
Sorry for what you are dealing with. I've been on a jury twice, but nothing like what you describe.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 8:29 am to The Spleen
quote:
Maybe write her a letter? Old people love getting letters and it would give her time to process it on her own time without having you in front of her to digest it all.
Really good suggestion. Not only will it let her process it at her own pace, it may also prove cathartic to you. The time you take to translate your thoughts to written word will likely help you work through your own turmoil.
One suggestion I'll make - stop trying to figure out why they did what they did. Tweekers are crazy, simple as that. Try to grab hold of what positives are out there. First, she didn't die and will hopefully recover. Second, you got to play a part in keeping the scum from hurting someone else.
Be really, really PROUD of the second part. Somewhere right now there's someone that won't be robbed and murdered because you were willing to endure your own emotional trauma. That person will never know it, but you helped save their life last week. Think about that and sleep well because of it.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 8:43 am to finestfirst79
Try to focus on the fact that you did your part to make the world a better place. Definitely seek some good counseling. Meeting the victim can oftentimes not live up to expectations.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 9:21 am to finestfirst79
Evil is real and when we see it it can definitely be overwhelming. Thank you for doing your part in our justice system and making sure that animal is put away...hopefully forever.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 9:31 am to JustGetItRight
quote:
The time you take to translate your thoughts to written word will likely help you work through your own turmoil.
This is the most important part, and I left it off my post. I started keeping a journal back in high school and college, and it is amazing how soul cleansing it can be to sort through your feelings by putting pen to paper. Even if you don't mail the letter, writing it all down can unload some of that burden you're carrying.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 9:52 am to Radiojones
Addiction is evil. There are so many fricked up stories of meth addicts doing terrible things. I'll never understand how someone can be so addicted to a substance that they are willing to kill over a few bucks that will likely only get them through a fix or 2.
OP, sorry you had to go through that. That's just awful. I wouldn't reach out directly as she may not be in the best of conditions anyways and even if she is, this is still a delicate situation. I like Spleen's idea of writing a letter, and you definitely need to seek professional help from a trauma counselor.
OP, sorry you had to go through that. That's just awful. I wouldn't reach out directly as she may not be in the best of conditions anyways and even if she is, this is still a delicate situation. I like Spleen's idea of writing a letter, and you definitely need to seek professional help from a trauma counselor.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 9:56 am to finestfirst79
Damn.
Counseling would be the best course of action. Maybe the letter idea posted earlier, but definitely talk to someone about it.
Counseling would be the best course of action. Maybe the letter idea posted earlier, but definitely talk to someone about it.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 11:36 am to The Spleen
quote:
Maybe write her a letter? Old people love getting letters and it would give her time to process it on her own time without having you in front of her to digest it all.
Excellent suggestion. Thanks very much. And thanks to all.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 2:39 pm to finestfirst79
Start a GoFundMe account for her recovery. Maybe there's already one existing. If so, donate to it.
Don't contact her directly. You'd be personalizing her pain. I'm positive she's grateful to all the jurors for putting that human flotsam away.
Oh, and thank you for serving. So many people try to escape jury duty. Probably the same ones who are too damn special to go to a voting booth.
Don't contact her directly. You'd be personalizing her pain. I'm positive she's grateful to all the jurors for putting that human flotsam away.
Oh, and thank you for serving. So many people try to escape jury duty. Probably the same ones who are too damn special to go to a voting booth.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 2:49 pm to Kentucker
Thanks for the service to your community. Not enough citizens do this dirty work. You sir, are to be honored. 
Maybe your church has a counselor or pastor that can help you?
Even if you have to pay for it yourself, get some help now. Not later.
Blessings from Missourah.
Maybe your church has a counselor or pastor that can help you?
Even if you have to pay for it yourself, get some help now. Not later.
Blessings from Missourah.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 3:28 pm to finestfirst79
I would avoid contacting her directly for legal purposes. The last thing you'd want is for the guy to appeal, find out as a juror you have "bias" towards the victim, and so on.
The GoFundMe might be a nice idea. But you probably want someone else to set it up.
Definitely talk to someone though about your own feelings/emotions. My Mom sat on a jury where a Girl Scout going door to door was kidnapped and raped. I was about the same age as the girl. She went to therapy for awhile to deal with the emotional fall out from serving on that jury.
The GoFundMe might be a nice idea. But you probably want someone else to set it up.
Definitely talk to someone though about your own feelings/emotions. My Mom sat on a jury where a Girl Scout going door to door was kidnapped and raped. I was about the same age as the girl. She went to therapy for awhile to deal with the emotional fall out from serving on that jury.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 3:40 pm to BluegrassBelle
quote:
I would avoid contacting her directly for legal purposes. The last thing you'd want is for the guy to appeal, find out as a juror you have "bias" towards the victim, and so on.
Any appeal would have to be based on errors that happened during the trial. Since the trial's over, any contact he has now wouldn't matter.
It is pretty easy to find examples of jurors having contact with defendants, victims, and prosecutors after a trial. Rodney King was even engaged to a woman that had been a juror in his civil case against the LAPD but Darwin finally got him before they married.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 5:17 pm to finestfirst79
I DEFINATELY wouldn't go by and see her un-announced. Think about it, if that was me I would have a gun REAL handy from now on- and myself or whomever is staying with me wouldn't hesitate a second to blow some stranger who popped by un-announced off my front porch before they even got a "hi" outta their mouth. Just write her a letter and ask if u can come by at a specific time and day if you feel compelled to talk to her face to face.
Posted on 3/21/16 at 5:29 pm to JustGetItRight
quote:
Second, you got to play a part in keeping the scum from hurting someone else.
Be really, really PROUD of the second part. Somewhere right now there's someone that won't be robbed and murdered because you were willing to endure your own emotional trauma. That person will never know it, but you helped save their life last week. Think about that and sleep well because of it.
Damn good advise right here OP.My wife endured similar but with child rape involved.It will take time to process but you're on your way by expressing your thoughts.
This post was edited on 3/21/16 at 5:31 pm
Posted on 3/21/16 at 5:58 pm to finestfirst79
Let it go. Doing anything just keeps the images fresh. Let it fade away
Page 1 of 2
Popular
Back to top
Follow SECRant for SEC Football News