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Portraits

Posted on 4/2/14 at 8:13 pm
Posted by Vols&Shaft83
Throbbing Member
Member since Dec 2012
69912 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 8:13 pm
There was a hunter in the woods, who, after a long day hunting, was in the middle of an immense forest. It was getting dark, and having lost his bearings, he decided to head in one direction until he was clear of the increasingly oppressive foliage. After what seemed like hours, he came across a cabin in a small clearing. Realizing how dark it had grown, he decided to see if he could stay there for the night. He approached, and found the door ajar. Nobody was inside. The hunter flopped down on the single bed, deciding to explain himself to the owner in the morning.

As he looked around the inside of the cabin, he was surprised to see the walls adorned by several portraits, all painted in incredible detail. Without exception, they appeared to be staring down at him, their features twisted into looks of hatred and malice. Staring back, he grew increasingly uncomfortable. Making a concerted effort to ignore the many hateful faces, he turned to face the wall, and exhausted, he fell into a restless sleep.

The next morning, the hunter awoke — he turned, blinking in unexpected sunlight. Looking up, he discovered that the cabin had no portraits, only windows.





Posted by Landmass
Member since Jun 2013
18147 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 9:01 pm to
That was a complete waste of time.
Posted by MouseHouseReb
Member since Mar 2014
231 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 9:03 pm to
ok campfire story i guess
This post was edited on 4/2/14 at 9:04 pm
Posted by Cheese Grits
Wherever I lay my hat is my home
Member since Apr 2012
54719 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 9:10 pm to
hunter = goldilocks
portraits = 3 bears
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:31 pm to
Where are the accompanying gifs?
Posted by MIZ_COU
I'm right here
Member since Oct 2013
13771 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:32 pm to
So when was the orgy?
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:35 pm to
It's my birthday. No time for orgies today.
Posted by DirtyDawg
President of the East Cobb Snobs
Member since Aug 2013
15539 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:41 pm to
quote:

It's my birthday.


Do something you might regret
Posted by MIZ_COU
I'm right here
Member since Oct 2013
13771 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:42 pm to
Like a birthday orgy
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:43 pm to
Well, I am half drunk at the bar....
Posted by MIZ_COU
I'm right here
Member since Oct 2013
13771 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:46 pm to
Well do the other half and start talking to the laaaadies...
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:49 pm to
Umm,yeah, I'm a chick, but thanks for playing.
Posted by Patton
Principality of Sealand
Member since Apr 2011
32652 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:51 pm to
So?
Posted by MIZ_COU
I'm right here
Member since Oct 2013
13771 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:52 pm to
quote:

Umm,yeah, I'm a chick, but thanks for playing.
Pic
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:54 pm to
No. Drunk, not stupid.
Posted by Patton
Principality of Sealand
Member since Apr 2011
32652 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 10:56 pm to
Well happy birthday. 40 is the new 30
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 11:02 pm to
frick off. frick 40. I'm nowhere close to 40. Not THAT close anyway
Posted by Patton
Principality of Sealand
Member since Apr 2011
32652 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 11:08 pm to
just giving you shite
Posted by MIZ_COU
I'm right here
Member since Oct 2013
13771 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 11:14 pm to
35 is the new 34
Posted by Dawggy_Style
Member since Oct 2013
558 posts
Posted on 4/2/14 at 11:15 pm to
Yeah, well, obviously I can glimpse 40 from here or I wouldn't be defensive.
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