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I sought the Lord and He hath answered, and assured a Bama victory
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:34 pm
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:34 pm
I did beseech the Lord to ask what would become of His team, the Crimson Tide, in the face of this band of pagans they will battle tomorrow. This lot who commune with the devil to conjure a victory where defeat was sure. These Tigers of Auburn.
And He came to me in a vision and said, "Flesh, my son, seek out and behold the ancient metal tablet you obtained so long ago. For in that, I have already answered."
So I searched and found the tablet:
But I said "Lord, what are you saying? For lo, the great coach and prophet has been departed from us for over three decades."
And then I looked closer and beheld the creator of the artifact, and the Lord's message was revealed as like a sun coming from behind the clouds:
Auburn, prepare thy faces. For there shall be a plague of scrotums, the likes of which has never been seen before.
And He came to me in a vision and said, "Flesh, my son, seek out and behold the ancient metal tablet you obtained so long ago. For in that, I have already answered."
So I searched and found the tablet:
But I said "Lord, what are you saying? For lo, the great coach and prophet has been departed from us for over three decades."
And then I looked closer and beheld the creator of the artifact, and the Lord's message was revealed as like a sun coming from behind the clouds:
Auburn, prepare thy faces. For there shall be a plague of scrotums, the likes of which has never been seen before.
This post was edited on 11/29/13 at 11:01 pm
22
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:37 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
Lets just say Saban didn't sell his soul to G-d for your wins
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:38 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:40 pm to mwlewis
i just watched forrest gump and he went to alabama so the gumps win this one
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:40 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
Amen? 
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:41 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
So a Bama fan will teabag another victim at Krystal, or they will be teabagged?
The Lord sure does work in mysterious ways.
The Lord sure does work in mysterious ways.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:48 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
My mom and dad still have those same trays. I ate many a TV dinner off of them as a wee tot.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:48 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
praise Saban. all hail.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:50 pm to GRTiger
quote:
So a Bama fan will teabag another victim at Krystal, or they will be teabagged? The Lord sure does work in mysterious ways.
After what I experienced, don't be surprised if there is a tea bagging on the field. I'm not talking figuratively either. We may very well see AJ pull his nut sack from his pants and drop it on Carl Lawson's chin. And I'll bet his scrot has been tattooed.
This post was edited on 11/29/13 at 10:51 pm
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:56 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
quote:
FleshEatingSalsa
I don't know who will emerge victorious tomorrow - you never do in a true rivalry game. But that made me LOL IRL. So...
Posted on 11/29/13 at 10:57 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
quote:
And I'll bet his scrot has been tattooed.
BamaBoys?
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:09 pm to semotruman
I like to think he has named each of his testicles and has their name tattooed there.
His scrot probably reads "Pancho" and "Lefty".
His scrot probably reads "Pancho" and "Lefty".
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:13 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
Kristi just had an aneurysm.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:16 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
Yeah.
It probably reads from left nut to right nut "21-0".
Oh, and 'preciate your interest in our QB's crystal balls.
It probably reads from left nut to right nut "21-0".
Oh, and 'preciate your interest in our QB's crystal balls.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:17 pm to dbt_Geaux_Tigers_196
That was funny. Just remember we are the not the self righteous fan base.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:18 pm to PepaSpray
quote:Saban? Satan? confused
praise Saban. all hail.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:19 pm to Rbama13
That's what I mean.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:20 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
And God said unto thee: frick YOU. I created the Sky Orange and Blue.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:21 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
If I were still able to go, I'd teabag all the Aubie's if it didn't mean I'd contract any possible disease onto my Championship Scrotum.
Posted on 11/29/13 at 11:22 pm to FleshEatingSalsa
Nothing like combining God, bear, auburn, and nut sacks all in one OP.
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