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re: Got to have a job to get a car according to my father.
Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:11 pm to _Hurricane_
Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:11 pm to _Hurricane_
quote:
P.S. Don't give me crap, this is a stupid problem, I know, I'm just looking for any of the dads on here for a solution. Also I'm about to turn 17, and almost all of my classmates have vehicles. I'm getting left behind in almost every out of school social circle because my parents won't drive me anywhere, so even though I put all the effort into academics, I don't get to enjoy the outside part of high school. I live 40 minutes away from my school because I'm on transfer so it's not like I can realistically expect someone to waste gas money to come get me.
Have your parents given you a reason why they don't think you need a car right now?
You shouldn't bother comparing yourself to your classmates. You don't really want to be like them. This is the peak of most of their lives. They'll stay around home, marry each other and never experience anything outside that little bubble. Fitting in with them should not be your goal in life.
I think you'll find out soon enough how meaningless social life in HS is. All of your fun comes in college. Keep busting your butt and you'll be rewarded. I know that doesn't make you feel any better now but this is one part of life that's about delayed gratification.
This post was edited on 6/10/16 at 4:13 pm
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Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:22 pm to _Hurricane_
It sounds like he is giving you some advice that will serve you in the future. You have to get innovative about things like this. Best of luck. 
Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:44 pm to DanMullins4Life
quote:
Your Dad sounds like a jerk. Have you considered becoming gay and dating a black man to get back at him?
That's what I did.
I love this board sometimes
Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:45 pm to _Hurricane_
Become a backpage escort, doing in call work at your mom's. It'll show him how committed you are to getting a car.
Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:48 pm to _Hurricane_
I never let not having a car get in the way of me getting a job.
Posted on 6/10/16 at 4:52 pm to _Hurricane_
I walked to work at McDonalds when i was in high school. I saved up for my first $500 ride.
Having said that times have changed depending on where you live. My daughter is in 7th grade. I got her a phone this year finally. She had been asking for one since the 5th grade. IMO that's retarded giving a phone to a kid in middle school.
My daughter said her and 1 other kid were the only ones without phones at her school. I thought to myself "that is total bullshite."
One night i texted a friend who is the PE teacher at her school. She told me that my daughter was actually telling the truth. I was floored. Got her a phone that week.
Times have changed. I call it "white people problems"
Having said that times have changed depending on where you live. My daughter is in 7th grade. I got her a phone this year finally. She had been asking for one since the 5th grade. IMO that's retarded giving a phone to a kid in middle school.
My daughter said her and 1 other kid were the only ones without phones at her school. I thought to myself "that is total bullshite."
One night i texted a friend who is the PE teacher at her school. She told me that my daughter was actually telling the truth. I was floored. Got her a phone that week.
Times have changed. I call it "white people problems"
Posted on 6/10/16 at 5:59 pm to _Hurricane_
I'm sorry that you're in the middle of your parents' tug of war. When kids are involved, people can't get completely divorced.
The result is that the tensions that were responsible for the divorce in the first place stay in effect and the kid usually suffers. Most often the parents can't see the harm they're doing because they're so engrossed in the struggle with their ex-spouse.
It doesn't seem that either of your parents is interested in "giving in" to the other even though both seem to think that a car would benefit you. You should probably reconcile yourself to being carless in high school.
Someone mentioned that college is much more fun than high school. That is very true.
It sounds like you're making the best of a bad situation regarding your parents. Set your goal for getting help from them then for a car.
Their irrational squabbling will subside over time. I hope they see what a great kid you are and how lucky they are to have you as a son.
The result is that the tensions that were responsible for the divorce in the first place stay in effect and the kid usually suffers. Most often the parents can't see the harm they're doing because they're so engrossed in the struggle with their ex-spouse.
It doesn't seem that either of your parents is interested in "giving in" to the other even though both seem to think that a car would benefit you. You should probably reconcile yourself to being carless in high school.
Someone mentioned that college is much more fun than high school. That is very true.
It sounds like you're making the best of a bad situation regarding your parents. Set your goal for getting help from them then for a car.
Their irrational squabbling will subside over time. I hope they see what a great kid you are and how lucky they are to have you as a son.
Posted on 6/10/16 at 6:38 pm to _Hurricane_
Congrats on having a good father.
Posted on 6/10/16 at 7:03 pm to _Hurricane_
quote:
don't live with him and the car is a point of contention between him and my mother. She is of the mind that he should buy it right now but he's pushing back.
This has nothing to do with you building character or having a job for a car, and everything to do with him trying to spite your mother because they don't get along. They're putting you in the middle of their petty arguments
Posted on 6/10/16 at 8:23 pm to _Hurricane_
If you live in a city then the job comes before the car. You can walk/bike/taxi/uber/lyft to work.
If you live in a rural area and live 10 miles from town then a vehicle is kind of a necessity.
Maybe your Dad is looking for you to prove yourself a little bit before surprising you with a ride?
Just do what he asks, in a couple short years you won't have to deal w/ that. Get creative and find odd jobs around the neighborhood or write some code, create a derivative app delivering cat food to cat ladys and sell that shite to google and tell Dad to get on deez nuts.
anyways keep on right path, find a job, get your car, play with some titties.
eta: upon reading further, if your Dad is making child support payments and has been consistently, then your mom can frick off and do what she's supposed to do w/ those checks and take care of you. Sounds like she's unwilling to make any sacrifices to her lifestyle and again is attempting to fleece your Dad.
If she has re-married or is keeping a boyfriend on the sly to keep those checks as big as she can she can doubly frick off.
Sorry your stuck in the middle of your parents tug-o-war, use the experience in your relationships in the future and make sure you have kids with the right person that you can have a nice future with.
If you live in a rural area and live 10 miles from town then a vehicle is kind of a necessity.
Maybe your Dad is looking for you to prove yourself a little bit before surprising you with a ride?
Just do what he asks, in a couple short years you won't have to deal w/ that. Get creative and find odd jobs around the neighborhood or write some code, create a derivative app delivering cat food to cat ladys and sell that shite to google and tell Dad to get on deez nuts.
anyways keep on right path, find a job, get your car, play with some titties.
eta: upon reading further, if your Dad is making child support payments and has been consistently, then your mom can frick off and do what she's supposed to do w/ those checks and take care of you. Sounds like she's unwilling to make any sacrifices to her lifestyle and again is attempting to fleece your Dad.
If she has re-married or is keeping a boyfriend on the sly to keep those checks as big as she can she can doubly frick off.
Sorry your stuck in the middle of your parents tug-o-war, use the experience in your relationships in the future and make sure you have kids with the right person that you can have a nice future with.
This post was edited on 6/10/16 at 8:29 pm
Posted on 6/10/16 at 10:20 pm to CtotheVrzrbck
Start cutting the grass of the people who live within walking distance. 20 bucks a yard.
Posted on 6/10/16 at 11:03 pm to _Hurricane_
If your parents don't want to help you get back and forth to and from work, then they should buy you a cheap car and then you pay them back. If you don't pay the money back before a set time then you lose the car.
Posted on 6/11/16 at 6:15 am to Cobrasize
1. amazon mechanical turk.
2. tutoring: either online or in person
3. odd jobs: cleaning, landscape, babysitting, elder care
4. Caddy
5. sell your old clothes and toys on Ebay
2. tutoring: either online or in person
3. odd jobs: cleaning, landscape, babysitting, elder care
4. Caddy
5. sell your old clothes and toys on Ebay
Posted on 6/11/16 at 7:47 am to _Hurricane_
Look kid,there is a simple solution.
Start fricking one of your teachers (pick one that,your buddies aren't already fricking),get her to buy a car for you.
Your Dad will think you are the coolest son ever,then upgrade your ride to a Shelby.
Seriously though,do your school work and everything you need to do. In a year,when you are at college,none of this will matter. Most of those friends with cars,they will probably be stuck there at home forever.
That High School Social Life,I know it seems important now,but it really isn't.IMHO,you are better off staying detached from it.You will have less baggage later.
Start fricking one of your teachers (pick one that,your buddies aren't already fricking),get her to buy a car for you.
Your Dad will think you are the coolest son ever,then upgrade your ride to a Shelby.
Seriously though,do your school work and everything you need to do. In a year,when you are at college,none of this will matter. Most of those friends with cars,they will probably be stuck there at home forever.
That High School Social Life,I know it seems important now,but it really isn't.IMHO,you are better off staying detached from it.You will have less baggage later.
Posted on 6/11/16 at 10:19 pm to skrayper
quote:
Times have changed
bullshite. This want that long ago.
My dad forced me to earn anything of value. Yeah I lived a somewhat spoiled life but I still worked my arse off.
My daughter will have a car but only because I already own it already. I built it, she will be forced to love it and drive it. If she doesn't like it, she can buy her own.
I asked a coworker recently if his son(12) would be interested in laying some pin straw for money while his dad was over at my house. He laughed. Said his son thinks he can make $100 washing cars even though he hasn't yet.
This is what is wrong with kids. My family had lots of money. But I was always forced to work to buy anything of value. I didn't do chores etc... I worked.
Posted on 6/12/16 at 12:34 am to _Hurricane_
Assuming you are honest about having good grades, playing many sports and being involved in a ton of extra curricular activities, I think it is retarded for your parents to not get you a vehicle. That would be a type of reward for your hard work. Assuming everything listed is true, I'll assume you also don't get into any trouble...yet another reason in your favor.
IMO, your mom and dad should put the same amount of money forward for your vehicle, and let you pay them back through a side job or summer job. (at very least)
Coming from someone that went through the same in high school, a vehicle helps. Luckily, my parents bought my first vehicle so I could be at all of my sporting events and such. I was blessed. They also bought the exact vehicle I wanted and my little brother now drives it. They had no problem doing so considering my accomplishments in the classroom and on the field.
IMO, your mom and dad should put the same amount of money forward for your vehicle, and let you pay them back through a side job or summer job. (at very least)
Coming from someone that went through the same in high school, a vehicle helps. Luckily, my parents bought my first vehicle so I could be at all of my sporting events and such. I was blessed. They also bought the exact vehicle I wanted and my little brother now drives it. They had no problem doing so considering my accomplishments in the classroom and on the field.
Posted on 6/12/16 at 1:18 am to TTsTowel
TIL my parents spoiled me. Thanks SECOT.
Posted on 6/12/16 at 10:39 am to _Hurricane_
Sit down with both parents together and state your case. Come prepared with a business plan so to speak. Have a list of potential jobs you will apply for and need a car for. Also have an idea of what you can earn from said jobs and a proposal to help with car payments, insurance etc. if your parents can't respect your case at this point then you're out of luck. I can't think of a sane business man that can't figure ROI on this proposition, that is if you're giving us all the story.
Posted on 6/12/16 at 12:03 pm to _Hurricane_
I bet your not a spoiled little bitch, are you? Get a job slick.
Posted on 6/12/16 at 5:13 pm to CtotheVrzrbck
quote:
If she has re-married or is keeping a boyfriend on the sly to keep those checks as big as she can she can doubly frick off.
I'd agree with this about alimony, but you only mentioned child support so I have to completely disagree. Child support shouldn't be affected by a parent's social life. Getting remarried doesn't absolve the other party of parental responsibility.
This post was edited on 6/12/16 at 5:15 pm
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