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11 Playground Essentials They Don't Make Like They Used To

Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:30 pm
Posted by pioneerbasketball
Team Bunchie
Member since Oct 2005
132299 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:30 pm

quote:

The object here was to get the thing spinning so fast that kids began flying off, one by one. The last one holding on for dear life was the “winner.” And to really test your mettle, you didn’t sit placidly in one of the “slots”—you stood up, or climbed astride the bars, or assumed some other death-defying position.



quote:

Whether you call them see-saws or teeter-totters, they just don’t make ‘em like they used to. The ones at my elementary school and neighborhood park were wooden, with splinters and chipped paint. They were also pretty tall, and installed on blacktop. A girl in my second grade class broke her collarbone when her fellow teeterer pulled the old “I’ll get off of my side while you’re up in the air” trick.



quote:

Those towering metal slides of yesteryear are being replaced with molded plastic models, and in order to conform to Consumer Product Safety Commission standards, the height and slope of those slides are far more restrictive. There was nothing quite like scooting down a metal slide in a skirt or pair of shorts after it had been baking in the hot sun all day. The sharp metal edges sometimes nicked you in a tender area when the surface seams began to separate, and since there were virtually no protective side rails, it wasn’t too difficult to accidentally flip over the side on your way down (say, if the heel of your sneaker accidentally caught and tossed you like a car skidding on the ice). Savvy kids brought a length of wax paper with them from home to sit on for extra-fast descents.




quote:

Yet another piece of equipment that taught us Fun With G-Forces. Kids gathered around the outside of the ring and grasped it. Then they ran around and around, faster and faster, until the thing spun so fast your body was lifted off of the ground and you were (hopefully) flying almost horizontally. It was all good, clean fun—until someone barfed.





quote:

Swing seats today must be made of vandal-proof rubber or some similar protectively coated material. It’s hard to find those thick steel or wooden seats that chipped many a tooth when they were thrown just so. The chains no longer have open S loops, and are quite often coated in vinyl … no more going home with orange palms from grasping rusty chains. And the swingsets aren’t nearly as tall, which takes a lot of the fun out of jumping from the seat when you’re at the highest point in your arc.




quote:

Similar to the Witch’s Hat, but with individual hanging pieces, so that the slower kids got rammed into, or perhaps smashed into, the center pole.



quote:

At my school the horizontal ladder was made of metal and perched over asphalt. Blistered hands were the natural result of crossing, especially in warm weather. When the safety monitor wasn’t looking, we engaged in “dog fights”—one person started from each end, met near the middle, and kicked and flailed their feet, trying to knock each other off the bars.



quote:

Truly adventurous kids climbed on the inside of this structure, so that they were upside-down at the top, then continued that way to end up head-first on the other side. And when the bell rang to signal the end of recess, if you happened to be on or near the top, you saved time by simply jumping down to the ground. Because only wussies bothered to carefully climb down when time was of the essence.




quote:

Thanks to the danger of getting smacked in the face, plus the steady stream of broken/jammed fingers as a result of kids hitting the pole instead of the ball, this game is slowly becoming extinct on public playgrounds.


quote:

Metal rings hanging on long chains are also now considered a safety hazard. Maybe that’s partly because kids used to do things like sit on top of the ring and swing and bash into one another, or hang upside down from their feet.




quote:

Or whatever they’re properly called. Today they’re all lightweight plastic with coated springs. But the real deal was made of solid steel, as was the coil beneath it. Heavy duty fun for all!
This post was edited on 7/29/15 at 11:42 pm
Posted by blue_morrison
Member since Jan 2013
5124 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:40 pm to
My old elementary school had this wall made of monster truck tires (or maybe regular truck tires? i dunno everyone was <10 ) strung up between 2 trees. We used to climb up them and chill out or play king of the hill.

We also had single ropes tied between trees that you were supposed to balance on. 1 too many idiot kids cracked their skulls from falling on the ground too hard and they made everything rubber ground and plastic jungle gyms.
Posted by pioneerbasketball
Team Bunchie
Member since Oct 2005
132299 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:45 pm to
We had something similar to this. Later on, we couldnt ride this after lunch.

Posted by VagueMessage
Fayetteville, AR
Member since Jun 2013
3902 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:46 pm to
From my experience, people just plain didn't like tetherball. I think that's more responsible for its declined. If it HAS declined. I can't be sure, since I struggle with being the adult and backing down from the challenges of small children, I'm not allowed to be near playgrounds anymore.

Well, that and the other thing.
Posted by pioneerbasketball
Team Bunchie
Member since Oct 2005
132299 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:47 pm to
quote:

I'm not allowed to be near playgrounds anymore. 

Pedo?
Posted by VagueMessage
Fayetteville, AR
Member since Jun 2013
3902 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:48 pm to
I'm pretty sure those were monster truck tires. I remember we had several sort of stuck in the ground that we'd crawl inside and on top of. They absolutely towered over us, and two people could fit comfortably inside one.
Posted by DirtyDawg
President of the East Cobb Snobs
Member since Aug 2013
15539 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:48 pm to
Monkey bars were God's gift to children
Posted by VagueMessage
Fayetteville, AR
Member since Jun 2013
3902 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:50 pm to
quote:

Pedo?


The rest of the joke was both before and after the quoted part, you know.
Posted by Robert Goulet
Member since Jan 2013
9999 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:52 pm to
The skin-melting slide and monkey bars were my shite when I wasn't dominating in basketball or playing smear the queer.

SN: what do kids call smear the queer these days?
Posted by DirtyDawg
President of the East Cobb Snobs
Member since Aug 2013
15539 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:54 pm to
quote:

SN: what do kids call smear the queer these days?


It was smear the queer as of 7 years ago for me
Posted by Robert Goulet
Member since Jan 2013
9999 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:56 pm to
quote:

It was smear the queer as of 7 years ago for me



It's good to know that these colors still don't run in some places.
Posted by DirtyDawg
President of the East Cobb Snobs
Member since Aug 2013
15539 posts
Posted on 7/29/15 at 11:58 pm to
Praise be to Deep South culture
Posted by pioneerbasketball
Team Bunchie
Member since Oct 2005
132299 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 12:00 am to
We also had these minus the holes. These were always cool in the hot weather.

Posted by CtotheVrzrbck
WeWaCo
Member since Dec 2007
37538 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 12:07 am to
quote:

smear the queer.


This game dominated my elementary school years.





Better than any video game ever made.
Posted by pioneerbasketball
Team Bunchie
Member since Oct 2005
132299 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 12:15 am to
Just did a google search of banned playground equipment.







This post was edited on 7/30/15 at 12:18 am
Posted by Robert Goulet
Member since Jan 2013
9999 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 12:24 am to
As much as I liked Rad Racer, I agree. It tested he mettle of a boy and helped prepare him for manhood. im sure it's but a memory of yesteryear at this point.
Posted by hawgfaninc
https://youtu.be/torc9P4-k5A
Member since Nov 2011
46419 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 12:34 am to
quote:

Pedo?


The rest of the joke was both before and after the quoted part, you know.

Posted by Landmass
Member since Jun 2013
18096 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 12:47 am to
Thanks for that. I laughed.
Posted by Magic City Rambler
Member since Jul 2015
21 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 1:18 am to
quote:

My old elementary school had this wall made of monster truck tires


My childhood church's playground had a couple of these with off road tires. They also had a pile of monster truck tires you could climb on and get in like a fort. Anytime it would rain there would be water inside the tires for days, those things are breeding grounds for mosquitoes.
Posted by Montezuma
Member since Apr 2013
3629 posts
Posted on 7/30/15 at 1:53 am to
quote:

smear the queer.



I will add Wall Ball, where you and a bunch of kids threw a tennis ball at a school wall and if it hit someone (they didn't catch it), they would have to run and try to touch the wall before someone threw the ball to the wall. Didn't make it? Face the wall and take a tennis ball to the back of your body.

Simpler times.
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