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re: WWYD, If You Found a Friends Probably Stolen Nude Photos Were Posted Online?
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:10 am to RaleighTiger
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:10 am to RaleighTiger
quote:
If this ever happens again, you'll just have to suck it up and tell her in person.
The anonymous email was not a terrible idea, but I'm also not surprised that she got pissed. At least the photos are down now.
THIS
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:11 am to Pinche Cabron
quote:
I am saying that you are a pussy for not telling her yourself - for emailing her anonymously
These things only lead to two things awkward situations and loss of friendships, sorry I am not an a-hole
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:12 am to NYCAuburn
You asked what we would do. I would go to the person. That's my answer
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:36 am to Pinche Cabron
quote:
You asked what we would do. I would go to the person. That's my answer
I think he did the right thing not going to her personally. Given her reaction to the email she would be incredibly embarrassed and probably avoid him going forward to avoid that embarrassment.
I might have put in the email something like "I am someone you know in real life who cares about you but I don't want to you feel ashamed around me so I am telling you this anonymously."
This post was edited on 6/23/16 at 11:37 am
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:46 am to cardboardboxer
Except now she is going to feel ashamed around everybody because it could be anybody she knows.
Posted on 6/23/16 at 11:58 am to Aggie Fishfinder
quote:
Except now she is going to feel ashamed around everybody because it could be anybody she knows.
Oooo good point. OP did it the best way then.
Posted on 6/23/16 at 12:45 pm to NYCAuburn
quote:
Pretty much.
I saw a non nude photo in a thread with other women as well.
Recognized her, sourced the photo to Reddit
Reddit contained many more photos, including many nudes. I am not that familiar with reddit but it was a Milf section
I talked to a female coworker on her thoughts if I should inform her, since the photos looked to posted without her knowledge.
I emailed from a burner account and she has responded about 10 times with comments like, "I am going to the FBI they will find you" "You anonymous people make me sick", "Not man enough to tell me who you are" etc...
My original email states I randomly came across them and wanted to tell her so she could get them removed if they were against her consent. I linked her what appeared to be the original post and linked the user and told her to track him down.
My original email was pretty clear that I didnt post them
Me informing her of who I am would only make the situation even more awkward.
She is pretty much on the offensive with me because I saw the photos.
Your heart's in the right place but I think you went about it in the wrong way. No matter how you phrased it, the anon e-mail is going to come across as threatening.
IMO, how I'd handle it would depend on how close my relationship is to the person in the photos. If it is someone I'm close to and have known for a long time, I'd contact them directly. While that might be uncomfortable , I think it would be better to hear the news straight from a close friend. Along those same lines, if it is someone I know but don't consider a particularly close friend, I'd probably first seek out someone in our mutual circle (almost certainly another female) that's closer and ask them to help break the news. Don't show the photos, just 'this is what I found, I need help telling her'. Again, hearing it from people you know is far better than getting an anon e-mail.
There's another reason to avoid the anon approach. Most states have laws against revenge porn. If she goes to LE, that anon e-mail is going to immediately attract their interest. When the e-mail host gives up subscriber information based a subpoena, that interest could be directed your way.
Posted on 6/23/16 at 1:00 pm to JustGetItRight
quote:
Most states have laws against revenge porn.
I seriously hope and pray my ex is well aware of this. Should have included the return of all such photos in the divorce settlement. I was way too naive in believing the whole "forever and ever" BS along with trusting him without question.
I would love to believe that he'd destroyed them but I know that he hasn't. It's such a reassuring, comforting feeling knowing that someone of his ethical and moral standards is in possession of those items.
My fault, though. I should've known better, I guess. I can, however, definitely say emphatically that it will never happen again.
Posted on 6/23/16 at 1:25 pm to NYCAuburn
So you posted her pics, emailed her to make sure she was aware lest it not have the desired impact. Then she threatens to find out who you are and take some sort of legal action.
So you come here to establish a digital alibi in hopes that investigators stumble upon this before they find anything else....or you could even subtly tip them off to this thread in some manner as proof/diversion. You look like a nice guy:)
I am just busting your balls a little.
Given that she is pissed with your burner and may have the ability to find out who it belongs to I would recommend the following if you are innocent:
Contact her and let her know who you are and how you came across them. Explain you contacted her anonymously to try and save her from being embarrassed should you guys ever cross paths again. You're sorry this has happened to her.....Parlay that into a meeting for you to provide the details of the entire thing. Meet over drinks. Console, console, console,
Profit
So you come here to establish a digital alibi in hopes that investigators stumble upon this before they find anything else....or you could even subtly tip them off to this thread in some manner as proof/diversion. You look like a nice guy:)
I am just busting your balls a little.
Given that she is pissed with your burner and may have the ability to find out who it belongs to I would recommend the following if you are innocent:
Contact her and let her know who you are and how you came across them. Explain you contacted her anonymously to try and save her from being embarrassed should you guys ever cross paths again. You're sorry this has happened to her.....Parlay that into a meeting for you to provide the details of the entire thing. Meet over drinks. Console, console, console,
Profit
Posted on 6/23/16 at 2:12 pm to NYCAuburn
can you tell me where to find these?
Posted on 6/23/16 at 2:52 pm to Sneaky__Sally
OP is really a fan of r/milf, but just doesn't want to come clean about it.
Posted on 6/23/16 at 2:54 pm to NYCAuburn
You saw the nudes and fapped. I know it.
Posted on 6/23/16 at 3:00 pm to Rounder1
quote:
Contact her and let her know who you are and how you came across them. Explain you contacted her anonymously to try and save her from being embarrassed should you guys ever cross paths again. You're sorry this has happened to her.....Parlay that into a meeting for you to provide the details of the entire thing. Meet over drinks. Console, console, console,
^^^^^This...
Then PIIHB
Posted on 6/24/16 at 6:12 am to NYCAuburn
There was a time I might have done what you did. But with reactions like hers, no way. If I'm not close enough to them to tell them directly, then tough luck, they screwed up allowing the pics.
Posted on 6/24/16 at 8:47 am to Stacked
Stacked
Finally we agree on something
Finally we agree on something
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