re: University of Missouri Prediction Thread

I hate that I have Battered Aggie Syndrome, but it comes out every year in games like this. Why?

BECAUSE EVERY frickING TIME WE HAVE SOME MOMENTUM, SOMETHING OUT OF LEFT FIELD frickS IT UP. It has happened so many times, I have come to expect it.

Here we are again, on the BRINK of GREATNESS. There is SO MUCH AT STAKE. If we win this game, JFF likely wins the Heisman. With a bowl win, we likely start the 2013 season in the top 10, maybe top 5. But, I have the gut-wrenching feeling that it's not gonna happen. When I ask myself why I feel this way, and think it though, I come to the conclusion that my unreasonable, Battered Aggie Syndrome is caused by these fears/suspicions:

Conspiracy
I am afraid and suspicious that t.u., baylor, tard, landtard, etc. will pool resources to somehow make sure we lose to Missouri, or make sure JFF has a really bad game to stop his Heisman chances this season. I have felt this way many times before. I went through phases where I thought other big 12 schools would work together and do their best to "keep Aggy down" by infiltrating our locker rooms, stealing our playbooks, paying people off to allow them to listen to our communication on the field, paying off people to record and release our game strategy and locker-room adjustments, paying off refs in games against weak teams or non-big 12 competition to ensure we got a loss, etc. You name it. I formulated these conspiracy theories. Especially after last years inexplicable 6-6 donkey abortion. I know it's unreasonable, but the Big Twatever has a lot to lose if A&M gets any more traction. For some reason, I just can't get over the thought that last year's 6-6 season was more a function of conspiracy than coaching or anything else. I just can't shake that suspicion. Call it paranoia.

Hoodoo Voodoo Aggie Karma
When things are going good, we are just unlucky. Look back at our history just over the past 25 years. Anytime we are about to really break through--BAAAM--frickED IN THE arse. Some totally unlucky shite jumps up and kills us. It's the Aggie way. We can NEVER reach elite status, no matter what we do, because God hates A&M or some Aggie robbed an Egyptian tomb with a curse on it. We are destined to be just out of reach every year. I can't shake this feeling. I am officially, certifiably frickED UP after following Aggie sports too long.

I need counseling for my B.A.S., but I know I am probably not alone.


For this reason, I think Missouri wins on Saturday or plays well enough to give Heisman voters enough fodder to shoot down JFF.

Scenario 1. Missouri by 3 in a close, low-scoring game.
Scenario 2. Aggies win by less than 3, and JFF has his shittiest game EVER.

Heisman--GONE
Good Bowl--GONE
Top 10 Preseason--GONE
Momentum--GONE
arse Virginity--GONE

quote:

---

some Aggie robbed an Egyptian tomb with a curse on it.

---

This definitely happened. We have a really good archeology department.

We are so assured of victory that Bovada is running scared by not posting the line for today's game. That's too bad, because I like free money.

I can't wait until we're up by 30 points and Kyle Field begins to shout "S-E-C, S-E-C, S-E-C..."

A&M 58
Misery 20

quote:

---

KaiserSoze99

---

A step towards healing your BAS?

quote:

---

A step towards healing your BAS?

---

Still have to clear the ULTIMATE hurdle...winning a game after December 31st.

We haven't won a post-midnight January 1st game since 1988.