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Social Anxiety
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:29 pm
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:29 pm
Anyone suffer from it, or close to someone that does, and gotten treatment of some kind for it? I suffer from it and have never gotten treatment(other than self treatment with illegal substances in college) and I'm starting to see similar behavior patterns in my daughter that I had at her age. I missed out on a lot of social situations because of it and don't want her to go through the same thing. I put an email in with the school counselor but just curious if anyone was familiar with anything that would help outside of medication.
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Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:34 pm to The Spleen
I never got treatment but I had it extremely bad when I was a teenager and in high school. It caused me to have significantly bad stomach pains and I ended up dropping out because of it. I saw a psychologist when I was younger but never actually addressed my social anxiety.
Not to get too personal -- but I never had friends in high school, I had my first girlfriend at 21 and struggled with confidence until very recently.
For your daughter...some people might think it's a bad thing, but I think it kept me away from a lot of other social problems that would have made me a different man today. I like what I am. I wouldn't go back and change anything.
Not to get too personal -- but I never had friends in high school, I had my first girlfriend at 21 and struggled with confidence until very recently.
For your daughter...some people might think it's a bad thing, but I think it kept me away from a lot of other social problems that would have made me a different man today. I like what I am. I wouldn't go back and change anything.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:41 pm to The Spleen
I had it bad in middle school and high school. I still have it somewhat when speaking to people I don't know or people of authority.
Medication only caused more problems for me (not saying they don't work for anyone else). Best I can say is just to motivate her to make friends. Close friends are what kept me going.
I don't know how old your daughter is, but maybe plan some social activities for her? One of the best decisions I ever made was to join a sport. I was terrified at first, but I think it really helped me. That or like a club or something. Good luck.
Oh and therapy. It helped me once I started actually opening up to my therapist.
Medication only caused more problems for me (not saying they don't work for anyone else). Best I can say is just to motivate her to make friends. Close friends are what kept me going.
I don't know how old your daughter is, but maybe plan some social activities for her? One of the best decisions I ever made was to join a sport. I was terrified at first, but I think it really helped me. That or like a club or something. Good luck.
Oh and therapy. It helped me once I started actually opening up to my therapist.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:42 pm to The Spleen
Probably. Although sometimes I honestly do just feel like having a night to myself and watching movies or something. I have avoided getting any medication for it out of fear that it will turn me into some sort of emotionless drone.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:44 pm to Eric Nies Grind Time
Nope don't have it but I hate people in general because they suck so there's that.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:47 pm to Wtodd
My nephew has it.
Best advice his parents were given was to tell him the plans well in advance so he could "prepare" for it and get use to the idea.
Becasue it was such a big issue, they wouldnt tell him they were planning to go to dinner until that night / right before it was time to go and he would freak out. By telling him in the morning, he has the day to adjust to the idea and seems to do much better.
Best advice his parents were given was to tell him the plans well in advance so he could "prepare" for it and get use to the idea.
Becasue it was such a big issue, they wouldnt tell him they were planning to go to dinner until that night / right before it was time to go and he would freak out. By telling him in the morning, he has the day to adjust to the idea and seems to do much better.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:49 pm to CNB
Thing is she is very popular in school and has tons of friends. She's never had a problem making friends, and is very social if she's in a situation where she's comfortable. I was kind of the same way in that I had a bunch of friends, but she is way more outgoing than I ever was. But if either one of us get in a social situation we're not comfortable with, we clam up and want to get out of that situation ASAP.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:49 pm to Chris4x4gill2
quote:
Best advice his parents were given was to tell him the plans well in advance so he could "prepare" for it and get use to the idea.
That's interesting. I have always had a problem with something deviating from a plan. It has lessened as I have gotten older though.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:51 pm to The Spleen
quote:
But if either one of us get in a social situation we're not comfortable with, we clam up and want to get out of that situation ASAP.
I think people that never feel uncomfortable in any social situation are pretty rare.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:55 pm to The Spleen
got it real bad myself. i take citalopram. it helps, but unfortunately there is no cure all. I would suggest therapy. If nothing else it just feels good to talk to somebody about it.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:57 pm to Eric Nies Grind Time
quote:
I think people that never feel uncomfortable in any social situation are pretty rare.
True, but it goes beyond uncomfortable. An example. My freshman year in college, I took a liking to a girl in one of my classes. We seemed to hit it off and before class one morning I said we should go out sometime. She said that sounded good and she was actually meeting some friends for dinner later that night and I should meet them there. I get to the restaurant, and notice through the window she was sitting at a table with about 12 other people I didn't know. The seat next to her was empty. I freaked out, went back to my car to calm myself down, but never could so I left. Next class meeting, she sat on the opposite side of the room.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 12:59 pm to The Spleen
Glad somebody finally brought this up.
I avoid situations where I might be tempted to take 2 or 3 people out, because I am afraid I will get arrested and locked up, before I reach my financial goals and am able to achieve global extermination.
It's a struggle everyday.
Really though, getting her involved in school and church activities might help on that.
I avoid situations where I might be tempted to take 2 or 3 people out, because I am afraid I will get arrested and locked up, before I reach my financial goals and am able to achieve global extermination.
It's a struggle everyday.
Really though, getting her involved in school and church activities might help on that.
This post was edited on 10/31/14 at 1:05 pm
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:01 pm to The Spleen
Yeah...that is a little extreme. But if it is just something like getting uncomfortable at a party with people you don't know...that's pretty normal.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:03 pm to The Spleen
Never, pretty much the opposite. My only problem is finding people who seem interesting enough to talk to. I do get tired/bored of people though and need some alone time to recharge. The wife is pretty understanding.
I love large crowds and while I do get nervous if I haven't done it in a while, I also enjoy public speaking and doing presentations.
I wasn't always like that though. I wasn't popular or liked when I was a kid and pretty much vowed I would be. I sat there and memorized jokes or how to behave in interactions from the 'cool kids' in one social group, then moved to another one and tried to do what they did. Took 15 years for me to be able to fake it well enough to have some good friends.
I love large crowds and while I do get nervous if I haven't done it in a while, I also enjoy public speaking and doing presentations.
I wasn't always like that though. I wasn't popular or liked when I was a kid and pretty much vowed I would be. I sat there and memorized jokes or how to behave in interactions from the 'cool kids' in one social group, then moved to another one and tried to do what they did. Took 15 years for me to be able to fake it well enough to have some good friends.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:09 pm to cokebottleag
That might be the damn weirdest thing I have ever read.... except for my own posts of course.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:14 pm to MasCervezas
quote:
got it real bad myself. i take citalopram. it helps, but unfortunately there is no cure all. I would suggest therapy. If nothing else it just feels good to talk to somebody about it.
I know it's rare but I think I cured it just by being adventurous for the most part. I was so bad that if anyone talked to me I'd start to turn red (then they'd mention it, and it'd just keep getting worse) -- but now I'm a teacher, and it kind of melted away. I figured out a few methods to cope with group activities from the military, and it seems to have transferred over very well to the civilian world.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:16 pm to The Spleen
quote:
But if either one of us get in a social situation we're not comfortable with, we clam up and want to get out of that situation ASAP.
That ain't social anxiety. That's normal.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:18 pm to Eric Nies Grind Time
Absolutely, but I can rattle off several examples similar to that one from my past where I couldn't get over being uncomfortable. Racing heart, sweaty hands, stomach cramps, being unable to speak when spoken to, even a couple of panic attacks. It may just be normal with my daughter, but her behaviors are too similar to mine for me to ignore.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:19 pm to The Spleen
quote:
stomach cramps
They were absolutely horrible when I was in high school.
Posted on 10/31/14 at 1:20 pm to The Spleen
Have you asked her if she is having the same physical symptoms?
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