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I am so Debord today at work so I figured I would post some jokes

Posted on 2/6/15 at 1:13 pm
Posted by Prettyboy Floyd
Pensacola, Florida
Member since Dec 2013
16129 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 1:13 pm
Q: What do Tennessee Volunteers do on Halloween? A: Pump kin!


Q: Why do ducks fly over Tennessee upside down? A: There's nothing worth shitting on!

Q: How do you know the toothbrush was invented in Tennessee? A: If it was invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.

Q: Why did the Volunteers change their uniforms to Orange? A: So they can play the game, direct traffic, and pick up trash without changing.

Q: How do you get from Athens, Georgia to Knoxville, Tennessee? A: Go north until you smell shite and west until you step in it.

Q: What do you call an Tennessee Volunteer in a BCS bowl game? A: A referee.

Q: How do you stop an Volunteers fan from beating his wife? A: Dress her in Blue and Orange!

Q: Why don't girls play hide and seek in Tennessee? A: No one would look for them.

Q: Where was OJ headed in his white Bronco?
A: To Tennessee. He knew the police would never look for a Heisman winner there

Q:What's the difference between a good ol' boy and a UT fan?
A:The good ol' boy raises livestock.
The UT fan gets emotionally involved.

A lady in Knoxville calls 911. Hysterically, she says, 'Someone's just broken into my house, and I think he's going to rob me!' The police officer says, 'Ma'am, we're really busy at the moment. Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you.'


Q: Four Tennessee players are in a car, who's driving?
A: The police

The University of Tennessee team has adopted a new Honor System:
'Yes, your Honor; No, your Honor'.

Q: How did the Volunteers spend the first week of Spring practice?
A: Studying their Miranda rights










Posted by TRUERockyTop
Appalachia
Member since Sep 2011
16313 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 1:15 pm to
Posted by CCTider
Member since Dec 2014
24425 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 1:16 pm to
Those were some awful, unofficial jokes.... except this one:



How do you stop an Volunteers fan from beating his wife? A: Dress her in Blue and Orange!



This joke redeemed a bad op
Posted by gameovergt
Orange Park, FL via Stevenson, AL
Member since Nov 2010
1963 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 1:39 pm to
horrible awful jokes.
Posted by Old Sarge
Dean of Admissions, LSU
Member since Jan 2012
57358 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 3:25 pm to
Well done
Posted by bama1959
Huntsville, AL
Member since Nov 2008
4586 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 3:57 pm to
Damn. That's funny.
Posted by WG_Dawg
Member since Jun 2004
87733 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 3:58 pm to
quote:

Those were some awful, unofficial jokes.... except this one:



Disagree. I think:

quote:


Q: What do Tennessee Volunteers do on Halloween? A: Pump kin!


was by far the best of the bunch. It's also the only one I haven't seen before, unlike the rest that have been forwarded around in chain emails [substituting various teams] since the late 90s.
Posted by beaver
The 755 Club
Member since Sep 2009
46861 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 3:58 pm to
quote:

A lady in Knoxville calls 911. Hysterically, she says, 'Someone's just broken into my house, and I think he's going to rob me!' The police officer says, 'Ma'am, we're really busy at the moment. Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you.' Q: Four Tennessee players are in a car, who's driving? A: The police The University of Tennessee team has adopted a new Honor System: 'Yes, your Honor; No, your Honor'. Q: How did the Volunteers spend the first week of Spring practice? A: Studying their Miranda rights


From a UGA fan
Posted by WG_Dawg
Member since Jun 2004
87733 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 3:59 pm to
Difference is we kick our shitheads out, UT covers things up all nice and neat like.
Posted by Vols&Shaft83
Throbbing Member
Member since Dec 2012
70051 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 4:17 pm to
quote:

UT covers things up all nice and neat like.





Tell us more
Posted by sandman24
Member since Feb 2015
84 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 4:18 pm to
i am getting band today
Posted by GregAl
Mobile
Member since Aug 2014
3659 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 4:49 pm to
Buck and Roy would be proud.

Posted by 1BIGTigerFan
100,000 posts
Member since Jan 2007
51105 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 5:14 pm to
Just awful...
Posted by sonuvapitcher
Member since Aug 2008
1972 posts
Posted on 2/6/15 at 7:00 pm to
A 2nd Grade teacher told her class that she was an Alabama fan. She then asked the children to raise their hands if they were also Alabama fans. Wanting to be like their teacher, all but 1 raised their hands. The teacher looked at little Amy and said, "I see you didn't raise your hand, why not?" Amy said, "I am an LSU fan." The teacher asked her why and Amy said, "Well my mother is an LSU fan and my father is an LSU fan, so that makes me an LSU fan." The teacher responded, "Well... what if your mother was a moron and your father was an idiot, what would that make you?" “Well”, said Amy, "I guess I would be an Alabama fan."

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