re: Why WASHINGTON can beat Alabama

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1. Jack "Cobra" Browning

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If he's anything like my Browning 12ga Shotgun, he should be money. Browning makes a damn fine shotgun.

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Offensive Line - They average a weight of 332 lbs across the line

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Damn, UW needs to fire their S&C coach.

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3. Kawasaki

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Yamaha is far more superior

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4. Speed, Speed, Speed

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But can they make fast people look slow?

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5. Time of Possession

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Unless points are awarded for whomever has the most TOP, who cares?

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I think UW wins rather easily, say 34-17

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Let's see, you have listed:
Browning
Overweight offensive line
Kawasaki
Speed,speed,Speed
Time of Possession

...and the best you could come up with is a 34-17 score?
Let me show you how it's done, son.

I predict Bama wins by a score of 56-0. Why you ask?
Well, 'If it was up to me, we wouldn't bring our offense or any damn quarterbacks. Outscoring teams is a sissy-arse way to win! We'd put 22 D-linemen out there and just beat the other team into submission -- that's real BY GOD football. But we've got some candy-arse Bowl Sponsors who say 'Hey, we want to see offensive touchdowns this year!' So we're going to ask our BY GOD DEFENSE not to score so many points against your hippy assed, liberal lovin', Bernie Sanders supportin', dope smokin', Upward League All Americans of yours. So we're bringing our offensive asses to the game just to make the sissy assed bowl sponsors happy. They'll be good for a few touchdowns or 12.