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re: Most painful poop you've ever taken
Posted on 8/20/16 at 8:53 am to TTsTowel
Posted on 8/20/16 at 8:53 am to TTsTowel
Man I shouldn't share this but I know what it feels like to give birth. And I am a man. After my first back surgery my dad give me a bottle of morphine capsules. I took them like a dumbass.
It didn't dawn on me that I had not took a shite in 3 weeks so during the Bama and Arkansas game in 07 I didn't take morphine instead I wanted to drink some beer for the game. Well by halftime I felt the kid pushing on the door.
Long story short. I should have just went to the hospital. Seriously. I ended up in the bathroom with old towels, latex gloves and a sweaty brow. In the end I had towels that were covered in blood and poo and I did things with my finger I am not proud of. It is worse than what I am telling you.
After that I became friends with laxatives while I took myself off the morphine. To this day I refuse to take opiates without taking laxatives with it. Horror show.
It didn't dawn on me that I had not took a shite in 3 weeks so during the Bama and Arkansas game in 07 I didn't take morphine instead I wanted to drink some beer for the game. Well by halftime I felt the kid pushing on the door.
Long story short. I should have just went to the hospital. Seriously. I ended up in the bathroom with old towels, latex gloves and a sweaty brow. In the end I had towels that were covered in blood and poo and I did things with my finger I am not proud of. It is worse than what I am telling you.
After that I became friends with laxatives while I took myself off the morphine. To this day I refuse to take opiates without taking laxatives with it. Horror show.
This post was edited on 8/20/16 at 9:56 am
2
Posted on 8/20/16 at 9:42 am to sunseeker
Sometimes you gotta go in after it.... 
Posted on 8/20/16 at 10:56 am to sunseeker
BBBBbbbbwwwaaaaaahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!
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