re: How would you announce your commitment to a school?

"I'd like to thank all of the coaches for these opportunities, and I'd like to thank my parents and god for giving me these abilities. I'll be furthering my education and playing football at the University of Louisiana State University A&M College"

Then I'd pull out my dick with ULSUA&MC tattooed on it.

Then I'd move to the UK and go to Oxford.



ETA: All trolling aside, I'd just put a hat on and say "LSU..." I'd want to make it the most lackluster announcement ever.