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Posted on 7/7/14 at 12:22 am
Posted on 7/7/14 at 12:22 am
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This post was edited on 7/9/14 at 11:38 pm
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Posted on 7/7/14 at 12:24 am to UMRealist
Pretty sure she knows that men poop. I really dont see the issue here, just ask to use the toilet.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 12:33 am to UMRealist
Haven't been with a new girl in 9 years. I'm useless here.
But maybe you should invest in some Poo-Pouri and carry it around with you?
But maybe you should invest in some Poo-Pouri and carry it around with you?
Posted on 7/7/14 at 1:06 am to UMRealist
Multiple courtesy flushes and you're good to go.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 1:14 am to UMRealist
I don't see what the big deal is; I normally go 4-5 days in between shits. My doctor says I have a huge colon. Apparently he sees it a lot around here.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 7:36 am to UMRealist
Go take a shower (surely you did this during your 4 day love fest), turn on the shower & vent, do your thing, take shower, by the time you get out the smell is gone & she Is none the wiser.
ps: she knows you shite
ps: she knows you shite
Posted on 7/7/14 at 7:56 am to UMRealist
I would fart in front of her. Then tell her I'm baking brownies and need to use the facilities. When I was finished I would describe it to her, not just the form and smell, but how it affected me emotionally. And she would love me for it.
This post was edited on 7/7/14 at 7:57 am
Posted on 7/7/14 at 8:34 am to UMRealist
Back in the day, I'd think of something to purchase and go to walmart or a local grocery store and drop a deuce while gone. Purchase what I said I was going to get and come back.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 9:07 am to UMRealist
You're doing it wrong. You need to mark that territory so other males know to stay away.
shite there and do it soon.
shite there and do it soon.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 9:38 am to UMRealist
Why not just duck off in the morning to a fast food bathroom?
You could also do the poop while the shower is going. I am thinking the poop anxiety is stemming from you not wanting her to 1. hear the poop, 2. smell the poop.
You could also do the poop while the shower is going. I am thinking the poop anxiety is stemming from you not wanting her to 1. hear the poop, 2. smell the poop.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 9:59 am to UMRealist
I've never understood the apprehension some of have of pooping in less than desirable locales. I've never had a problem deucing any place the need arose, but I guess some of that has to do with growing up with 3 siblings in a 3BR 2BA home.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 10:39 am to UMRealist
Tell her you're taking a shower, turn the water on, spray some smell good stuff before hand, stream some music on your phone at full blast, shite, spray again, proceed to shower to wipe your stink off.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 10:53 am to UMRealist
Similar issue this weekend.
Hotel wedding. Brought new girlfriend. Was uncomfortable shitting while she was in the room. Had to sneak away but felt the pressure of needing to hurry and never got it done to satisfaction.
Hotel wedding. Brought new girlfriend. Was uncomfortable shitting while she was in the room. Had to sneak away but felt the pressure of needing to hurry and never got it done to satisfaction.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 2:30 pm to UMRealist
Depends on how bad I have to go. If it begins to hurt I will just go take a shite. If you gotta go, you gotta go.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 2:35 pm to UMRealist
This entire thread gave me the IRL 
Posted on 7/7/14 at 3:19 pm to UMRealist
Drop the kids off in the pool and own the stench.
Be a man just like men were men and didn't worry about such trivialities.
Once done, slap her on the arse and ask about that sandwhich she's about to make you.
Be a man just like men were men and didn't worry about such trivialities.
Once done, slap her on the arse and ask about that sandwhich she's about to make you.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 5:18 pm to UMRealist
I usually take a monster shite, tell them they left their phone in the bathroom, watch them go in, and hold the door so they take in the full smell.
Posted on 7/7/14 at 5:53 pm to UMRealist
My biggest issue is why do women use so much toilet paper?
Posted on 7/7/14 at 7:06 pm to UMRealist
Wait, OP didn't shite for 4 days? Is he still alive?
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