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Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:20 pm to Sheftie
I was a buck tooth bee stealing cover in the kitchen window. with a phantom pianist undressing an old black typewriter across the room. with reports of men and their mood swings. none of us needed any bright ideas. It was just a gentle race for the door
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:25 pm to Sheftie
I remember it was a thursday night because we played redneck music those nights for the older crowd. my little brother had let me borrow a cowboy hat for the night. it was really a western style hardhat he picked up out in texas working for the carnival. but it worked for this occasion
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:27 pm to Sheftie
Yall are florida and im kansas basically
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:29 pm to Sheftie
Marty, our repulsively fat DJ, was spicing it up with some kenny rogers anthems and eating weird shite from tupperware containers. I spent the night mixing up salty dogs and vodka tonics
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:33 pm to Sheftie
I remember she walked in around 11. dragging her little korean pig behind her like always. Her name was melanie but she made everyone call her Jeff for some reason. she dated a big grumpy bitch name sandra that cooked at the seafood place across from my house. I was cool with both of them but god damn could jeff light up a room
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:35 pm to Sheftie
She had soft brown hair cut short, cut like jimmy kimmell. Very petite, maybe 90 lbs, with pointy elfish features. and always in an amazing mood. she glowed like a brand new text message. I guess you could say i had a crush on her. We were really close
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:42 pm to Sheftie
As was our routine, when i got off around 3 we grabbed a bottle of jameson and took a walk on the beach. Just me, jeff, and the pig
Posted on 7/12/19 at 11:47 pm to Sheftie
Im out
Wifes looking at me at me like shes ready to cash in a bitcoin
See you on the filp
Wifes looking at me at me like shes ready to cash in a bitcoin
See you on the filp
Posted on 7/13/19 at 7:14 am to Sheftie
Welcome back
Posted on 7/13/19 at 9:57 am to Sheftie
Old man still alive?
Posted on 7/13/19 at 8:26 pm to Cobb Dawg
Turned 1 a few days ago
We're out of town and wife gives him a fricking bday party
Posted on 7/13/19 at 11:40 pm to Sheftie
Yall could've told me
Deerpig, kneehigg, cobb, spunk, nu..
This shite sucks
I trusted yall
Deerpig, kneehigg, cobb, spunk, nu..
This shite sucks
I trusted yall
Posted on 7/15/19 at 12:45 pm to BreezyDawg
Seems like it should have a different hot sauce. Sriracha is about as Mexican as bratwurst, poke, and couscous.
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